So I started a new job back in June. Got close with some people which is odd for me. A couple days ago, I confided in one of them that I have PTSD and she ended up telling most of the People on our team. After that I apologized to two girls who we often made fun of. That same day that entire group of people started making fun of each other, the two girls and supervisors. I told one of the supervisors and now they the group of people are targeting me and making smart comments about me. My supervisor and manager tell me to get thicker skin but with the PTSD this is really hurting me. Any advice?
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Targeted At Work
- Post starter Grace511
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Oh my goodness. What a tangle. I am not sure I understand.
* You and others used to make fun of two of the girls.
* All the people at work started targeting each other and making fun of each other.
* You told management that the others were making fun of each other or do you mean you told one about the PTSD?
* The group is now targeting you and making fun of you.
Could you give an example of what the making fun looks like? What words are said and how.
One of the things I find important is to be very careful who I tell personal information to. To think how trustworthy they are and likely to treat it with respect.
* You and others used to make fun of two of the girls.
* All the people at work started targeting each other and making fun of each other.
* You told management that the others were making fun of each other or do you mean you told one about the PTSD?
* The group is now targeting you and making fun of you.
Could you give an example of what the making fun looks like? What words are said and how.
One of the things I find important is to be very careful who I tell personal information to. To think how trustworthy they are and likely to treat it with respect.
cherryblossom
VIP Member
What a horrible environment in which to work. It sounds awful. But, like Abstract, I think some more details would be helpful.
Seasounds
Diamond Member
Creare boundaries. If the goal is to keep your job, creating any kind of boundaries will need to be done very sensitively and diplomatically. Also, the size of the business, and whether there is an Human Resource department matters, that can ultimately protect you from bullying.
Personally, unless absolutely necessary (due to needing leave from work due PTSD exacerbation) I would not reveal to anyone else, at your work, anything about your condition,especially within the first 90 days, where many businesses have a trial period for employees. After this time, if you work enough hours per week, you can submit an FMLA for PTSD that will allow you to not have any PTSD related sick time counted against you.
Secondly, to decrease people taking to you about PTSD, now that you have opened the topic, you will need coping skills to gracefully deflect and signal to them that you are now wanting to talk about other things, and make sure you do not appear hostile. To support ethical treatment of everyone at the workplace, you can set an example of not "making fun" in the work place. Laughter is good, when it is not mocking others.
Acts of kindness, are helpful ways to mix in with others.
If problems like bullying develop, you may need to ask HR or your manager for help. However, from the limited information I have, it soundslike the manager and supervisor are not mature, nor trustworthy. For this reason, you may want to see if you can create boundaries yourself at work. And save PTSD talk for you friend at outside work.
Personally, unless absolutely necessary (due to needing leave from work due PTSD exacerbation) I would not reveal to anyone else, at your work, anything about your condition,especially within the first 90 days, where many businesses have a trial period for employees. After this time, if you work enough hours per week, you can submit an FMLA for PTSD that will allow you to not have any PTSD related sick time counted against you.
Secondly, to decrease people taking to you about PTSD, now that you have opened the topic, you will need coping skills to gracefully deflect and signal to them that you are now wanting to talk about other things, and make sure you do not appear hostile. To support ethical treatment of everyone at the workplace, you can set an example of not "making fun" in the work place. Laughter is good, when it is not mocking others.
Acts of kindness, are helpful ways to mix in with others.
If problems like bullying develop, you may need to ask HR or your manager for help. However, from the limited information I have, it soundslike the manager and supervisor are not mature, nor trustworthy. For this reason, you may want to see if you can create boundaries yourself at work. And save PTSD talk for you friend at outside work.
D
Deleted member 1860
I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. I don't know if I'd call it targeting so much as everyone going after everyone else, which seems to be pretty toxic.
I kind of see it as you were taking things out on other people and now it's coming full circle and you can't handle it. I'm not throwing around blame, rather saying that these things tend to come around and bite us in the arse.
You can't change the past but I hope that next time you see some catty person who badmouthes others, you'll steer clear as it takes 2.5 seconds for that behavior to be turned around on you, as it was here.
I'd stick to my work and avoid the drama. If you can talk to HR, then do it. If its a small company, you may just have to suck it up and deal on your own without much outside help.
I wish you the best.
I kind of see it as you were taking things out on other people and now it's coming full circle and you can't handle it. I'm not throwing around blame, rather saying that these things tend to come around and bite us in the arse.
You can't change the past but I hope that next time you see some catty person who badmouthes others, you'll steer clear as it takes 2.5 seconds for that behavior to be turned around on you, as it was here.
I'd stick to my work and avoid the drama. If you can talk to HR, then do it. If its a small company, you may just have to suck it up and deal on your own without much outside help.
I wish you the best.
franciemarnie
Diamond Member
Everyone here has given great suggestions and ideas.
I just want to add that I was bizarrely targeted at work once and it had nothing to do with PTSD. It only happened at one place for a while when some new people worked there for a couple months. It was a total drag. They were just being irrational bullies but beyond being real jerks, there wasn't much I could do since management didn't perceive a situation in which to intervene. I didn't take any ish but it was stressful. I didn't want to leave so I focused on my job and the people that were cool. The lousy behavior people eventually left. I hope things go better for you there. Who needs additional, unnecessary stress.
I just want to add that I was bizarrely targeted at work once and it had nothing to do with PTSD. It only happened at one place for a while when some new people worked there for a couple months. It was a total drag. They were just being irrational bullies but beyond being real jerks, there wasn't much I could do since management didn't perceive a situation in which to intervene. I didn't take any ish but it was stressful. I didn't want to leave so I focused on my job and the people that were cool. The lousy behavior people eventually left. I hope things go better for you there. Who needs additional, unnecessary stress.
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