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Ten, Twenty, Thirty - Words, For When Sentences Evade You

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10: lost in thought; ready for war; no one to fight with
20: flashlights help when the power fails; other times too; yes; elephants; roses; hospitals; lamp; coma; pain; out of breath; happy
30: foggy; cold; rainy; sunny; windy' humid; dry; sandy; mouse; moose; plaything; toys; keyboard; computer; tower; castle; horse; slinky; bear; ribbon; books; paper; hat; lost count; spray;baby; miscarriage; grandma
 
Day 26

10: bullies, two, Karlyn, Dominique, prison?, maybe, quit cigs, breathe, blow

20: rain, wet, quiet, pain, worry, remember, Junior High school, she was crazy, more than me, her own brother scared of her

30: he came to my house, to beat me, but heard me out, something happened after that, don't know what, but was left alone, after, think I found her, not sure, messed up, this morning. Years add up, home town, could really be her
 
Ten: Escalating anxieties, lots of worry, struggling faith, heart pounding discomfort.

Twenty: No anxiety med, wtf, little to no relief, doctor's denial, refuses to listen, must overcome or suffer this obstacle, angry.

Thirty: Watch running out of time, must move faster, accomplish more or lose, unsatisfied, fighting losing time, too much additional anxiety, intrusive memory violations, steals time, well of frustration, behave good.
 
Day 27

10: phlem, blood, throat clearing, hot cheeks, damn it, not again, still

20: husband, home, off today, breakfast, see the mothers, nice, together, it helps, for him to be there, see too, not feeling well, today

30: nightmares, last night, slept badly, tossed, turned, disturbed, a dream, though, not real, disappointed, weight, health goals, not improving, stuck, trying to think, why am I stuck?, rut, another damn rut, keep moving
 
Day 28

10: rough, sleep, throat, sore, nose, stuffy, feel like shit, again

20: head ache, up early, conflicting things, two appointments, going to be late to one, nurse didn't call me back, again. stop by, today

30: cord, wonder if I can get two, hope so, how much?, not hungry for food in general, tastes icky, two days, start, two new goals, which two?, running, busy, today, got to get back on track, physically, feeling pretty bad, fatigue high, curl up, die
 
Day 29

10: sore throat, up too early, car, how much?, doctor, jerk, deal with it

20: mom's, housework, visit, giving me a ride, grateful, be nice, smile, relax with her, husband, tired, hunting, primitive weapon, this weekend, firing range

30: expensive, need to repeat, Brenda, missed chemo, new music, no nightmares, dreamless, good, distilled water, get it, for cpap, you forgot yesterday, what did they want?, too late now, appointment today, Bodi, treatment working?, mister said wait, another month
 
Day 30 (and conclusion of this goal/activity, though I may come back and visit occasionally because I really think this is a helpful exercise to start my day with. I can blurt out and read what's going on... like a brain strorm. It helps me to see if anything is "running in the background"... because I still have been surprised how innaccurate my mind set is when I start my day)

10: 2 goals, done, new one starts, today, blessings, car, cheaper than expected

20: help from a stranger, too, even mom stepped up, doctor still a puzze, don't like him really, no choice, though, got to keep him, facial pain

30: med concerns, hydrate, drink water, lots, 30 days, got to do it, no skipping, not on the c-pap either, sunny day, mild temps, rye grass growing, green, I like green, missing kitten, bob tail, I hope she finds it, stupid girl, busy street, worry, stress, keep an eye out
 
Ten: tired, smoking, unhealthy, scared, bed, new life-style, where, when, how.

Twenty: bored, scared, lost, overwhelming, tommorrow, dull isolated work, nothing exciting, dying, trapped, lost everything important, living stress, fck this sh't.

Thirty: Ooooh I said bad word, wacky, who wouldn't be, oblivious to holidays, Christmas, New Year's, feel hopeless, upcoming appointments, too tired, EEG, lost everything important, depressed, sad, night-time blues.
 
Ten: So little time, disappointed with time, anxious, stressed, tension, pressure.

Twenty: Frustrated with passing time, need more time, invent time, situational anxieties, read, medical appointments, missing mother - fear & anxiety, guilt & sadness.

Thirty: ill prepared 4 upcoming medical appointments, frustrated, disappointed, working challenges - overwhelm, distraction, anxiety, conflicted needs & desires, numb cold tingling purple feet, use them or lose them, laugh out loud, why not.
 
Ten: New knowledge, several high risk factors, who knew, concerned, questions.

Twenty: Depleted this afternoon, daughter's stress and frustrations, son's teasing and tormenting, noise, back - neck & base of skull pain again, exhausted, read tonight, good materials, nagging need to know what's what.

Thirty: Plots surrendered, how come, not necessary, inconsiderate lawyer, worrisome, disappointed, troublesome, overwhelming pressure, not enough time, how, stress, elementary school bights, backward & disordered school's mission statement, baseball, money, soon, exhausted.
 
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