Undiagnosed Terrified All The Time - Home Invasion

[eila7]

Almost three weeks ago my boyfriend, 3 others and I were the victims of a home invasion. It was the most terrifying thing I have experienced. Three guys came in with guns, tied us up, hit my boyfriend and another friend over the head, took whatever they could and left. Since then I cannot sleep. I am startled by every sound, I shake and my heart feels like it will burst out of my chest. I have gone for counselling but other than that I have no support.

Everyone else seems to think that since there was no serious injuries that everything should go on as normal. I go to work exhausted everyday, I feel miserable and have no interest in anything. I feel like a prisoner in my home. I want to move but my boyfriend is not supportive. I feel like crying all the time. I am so angry at the thieves for taking away my sense of security and peace.

Life was pretty crappy before then, now it's miserable. I am grateful we got out of it relatively unharmed. I worry everyday that they might come back. I live in fear. I keep thinking what will I do if there's another break in. I am so scared that the next time (if it happens again) will be worse. even those that were the victims don't seem to be worried. 2 of the others are our landlords. They have not upgraded security or even put up more light outside. I don't think the current doors and gates will be much use. I just want to be able to sleep at night!!!

 

[scout86]

I'm not an expert, but I think, according to technical definitions, what you're experiencing is considered "traumatic stress". There's some kind of time lag before they call it PTS. BUT, you're sure experiencing what you're experiencing! Everyone deals with this stuff differently. It's totally possible that the rest of the people involved are dealing with it with "denial" which is not necessarily the best approach either. You're doing the right thing, by looking for help processing what happened. You might check and see if there are support groups in your area for people who have been the victim of a violent crime. A lot of areas have them and I would think it might be a good place to go for support. Good luck!

 

[ClairBear226]

Are you more stressed at home? Are there specific things that set you off, like noises outside, or is it just a general feeling of hypervigilance? Have you actually been diagnosed with PTSD at this point, or no? Depending on how long you've been in treatment, your diagnosis and what the specifics are to your trauma and symptoms, I would ask about the plan of care your therapist has in mind for your treatment, so that you can get some relief. And I would be sure it is a therapist that has experience with trauma. There are some good guidelines for choosing a therapist in the Wiki section if you find that yours doesn't. I used them myself. I honestly didn't get much relief from talk therapy, though my trauma was of a completely different nature than yours. Prolonged Exposure therapy and EMDR is what made the biggest dent in my symptoms. Bottom line: don't tread water here. If what you're doing isn't working, then reevaluate what you're doing. There are good treatment options out there. Explore the Wiki section here, and talk to your therapist about the gameplan.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Hi, please push for more help before this develops into PTSD.

Welcome.

 

[ericaboo]

Welcome to the PTSD forum.

 

[Abstract]

Welcome here.

You have every right to your reactions and it doesn't matter how the others reacted.

Make sure that you see someone who specialises in trauma and PTSD as general therapist usually don't know enough.

Sharing with others, such as on here, is one of the things that is supposed to help prevent the reactions setting in long term.

 

[intothelight]

Hi Eila,

Welcome to MyPTSD forum! :)

Life was pretty crappy before then, now it's miserable.

I am sorry that you had to experience the terror of a home invasion, but you do not deserve to live a crappy life. Find a therapist and set the goal of living a happy life.

Wishing you the best.

Debbie

 

[eila7]

Hi everyone. Thank you for the kind replies. I have been going to counselling. It's just being in the house that terrifies me. I am fine anywhere else. I haven't had much sleep so I am not functioning well at work and I feel irritable.I have looked for support groups in my area, unfortunately there is nothing. We don't even have a neighbourhood watch.

The therapist I'm seeing is a specialist in trauma counselling. Yesterday I asked my friend if I could stay with her for a few days and she turned me down. This is why I feel like I have no support. I don't understand why people think I should just get over it. If it happened to them, they would not be saying that. If I do not "get better" in 4-6 weeks after the incident then I will be diagnosed as having PTSD. It's just the thought of it happening again and what could happen.

 

[ClairBear226]

If I do not "get better" in 4-6 weeks after the incident then I will be diagnosed as having PTSD.

Eila, If your therapist has said this, I'd be concerned. That is not correct. Check the Wiki pages here for diagnostic criteria of PTSD.

What kind of plan of care has your therapist talked about? When did the home invasion occur?

 

[eila7]

Hi ClairBear226. He has just told me that what I'm experiencing is normal and to take sleeping pills to help me sleep. Also to move to a new place. Other than that it's just a conversation about how I feel and not much more. It will be a month tomorrow that the home invasion occurred.

 

[Venusian]

Hi Eila, welcome to the forum.

I want to say what everyone else has already mentioned, your feelings are valid. It was a terrifying situation you were in. It is good that you are looking for support and advice. There are things you can do to try and keep this from developing into PTSD because you really don't want it. Therapy is good, talking with friends, writing. If you have a good friend just let them know that you need to talk and you may need to talk about it again and again. I write, some times the same things over and over again, day after day until I suddenly realize I haven't written about it in a while. Where I live there is a Victim Services centre that is part of the police services but is separate from the police station. They can help finding support groups or help with navigating the police system if there is an ongoing investigation.

Have you tried being proactive? Is there something that you can do yourself to help you feel safer in your home? Can you install better locks or outside lights without waiting for the landlords to do it? Can you get an alarm system? Can you take a self defence course? What is it that would make you feel safer without waiting for someone else to do it?