This is an a**hole of a disease!!!!

[Itsnotyouitsme]

I’m absolutely fed up.

I think of my PTSD and then I realise just how messed up this whole mental state is. How can a a human being loose their entire self, everything they’ve ever known, be flooded with terrifying and painful flashbacks, anxiety attack’s, avoid human interaction, be in constant fear, undertake things to absolutely self destruct, suffer in pain day in day out and STILL survive?!

This is no life at all. Nobody should have to experience this, it’s an absolute mind f*ck.

 

[loui50]

I'm sorry you are feeling this way. I just want to give you some hope. After 15 years of PTSD I'm finally feeling a little better. Life isn't perfect but my therapist has really helped my learn to enjoy my life again. I hope you can find the support you need.

 

[Itsnotyouitsme]

I'm sorry you are feeling this way. I just want to give you some hope. After 15 years of PTSD I'm finally feeling a little better. Life isn't perfect but my therapist has really helped my learn to enjoy my life again. I hope you can find the support you need.

15 years?! Kudos to you for really hanging in there for so long. I’m hopeful that one day I’ll be able to say the same thing... although I’m not so sure I can survive this thing for that long.

 

[Ellabella44]

What keeps me trying is seeing all of the events that happened after my attempt years ago. I've seen events within my current family ( husband and kids) that they needed me for. The one to be their best help was me. If I'd gone through with it, they would have gone through those events alone wishing I'd been there.

 

[DharmaGirl]

Kudos, @Ellabella and @loui50, it's nice to see some other survivors. @Itsnotyouitsme, you're right, it SUCKS, and it takes a long time to heal, and you have to go through the grief of losing what you had. I totally get it. I lost all that too. It takes work when you don't want to to get better, a lot of work, so don't give up. You are here and that's a step in healing. You are posting too so you are taking steps toward healing yourself. You made it through the trauma, you can make it through the healing!