Sexual Assault Triggered By Words(?)

[jadebear]

As soon as I read the word "mysexabuse" when I came here, I started feeling anxious. And then I saw the words "guilt, violence, torture and shame", and I felt like I couldn't breathe and started having a slight panic attack.

Did seeing the new name here affect anyone else in that way? Or is just me?

 

[anon]

Yes. There are a lot of other words that affect me the same way too.

 

[jadebear]

It's good to see I'm not the only one.

The same thing happened when I just came here again. I hope it eventually gets better, otherwise I will just stop coming here altogether.

They're just 'words', so I don't understand why I am having such a hard time with them.

 

[anon]

Words are very powerful, Jadebear. Don't be embarrassed or feel like you are "stupid" because you are affected. :) You read them and then your brain responds because the concept is being introduced to your brain. The same thing would happen if you looked at a picture of a r* victim or anything else, it's the same response. Your brain is just triggered by the stimuli and of being reminded of those concepts.

 

[jadebear]

Does anyone else fear that pervs will stumble upon this site and see 'mysexabuse' and lurk or become members because they get off on reading that kind of stuff?

I was ok with the name before, but now, after actually seeing it, it is really bothering me. But, I guess this is my own issue that I will have to deal with.

 

[anon]

I think the risk of that happening is the same regardless of the website name. There has always been that potential. For me, I have just learned to deal with the potential prospect and write knowing that in mind. I am able to cognitively dissociate from the idea because I have not personally been exposed to anyone who has read my story just for the purpose of getting off. Therefore I can sort-of ignore it and write regardless. There are pervs everywhere on the internet. You can't escape them. Just protect yourself online as best you can.

 

[cherryblossom]

I hope it does get better for you JB, I for one, don't want you to stop being here :hug:

Like anon has said, I think that any title with the words 'sex', 'abuse' in the title has 'potential' for lurkers and pervs. I don't think this name change actually changes anything from that perspective.

Words aren't 'just' words, they can evoke some very provocative emotions - maybe those words are the start of 'exposure therapy' - (I don't know?!).

As with anything online, you need to keep yourself as safe as you can, and we (admins/ staff) will do our best too.

 

[jadebear]

I know this is my own issue and has nothing to do with this forum or the new name.

Just seeing all of those words together like that created so many thoughts and images in my head and freaked me out a little bit. I wasn't expecting something like that to happen. I have been in therapy close to 2 years, have been a member here for quite awhile and I was surprised that after this long 'words' could affect me in that way.

I realize that every forum has the risk of having members that aren't who/what they claim to be. Like I said, I was just a little freaked out. It made my imagination run wild. Sorry.


*p.s.*.....my reaction wasn't as strong today when I saw the words.

 

[cherryblossom]

No need to say sorry, JB. Your feelings are valid, so no need to apologise for them. I didn't mean to come across as invalidating your feelings, I was just trying to reassure you.

I'm glad your reaction wasn't so strong today, and hope it continues to get better for you.

 

[jadebear]

I didn't mean to come across as invalidating your feelings.

You didn't, I kinda did that myself.

It doesn't seem to bother me as much seeing the words now. I think I'm getting used to them.