General Vagueness

[Toria]

I've been having an issue with husband just recently where he goes a bit vague and, well, the only way to describe it is spaced-out. It generally happens late at night, but it has happened at other times. It happened last night - we were watching television (nothing awful - snake people in Florida. I tend to be wary about what I "let" him watch) and he was staring at the screen but not watching it if you know what I mean? I said something to him and he just said that he was going to bed. I stood up to close the blinds and asked him if he was okay - he looked at me, but he was looked through me and his eyes were all over the place. I did the usual pre-bed things and so did he. I know he didn't sleep well, and hasn't for a couple of nights - but I just wondered if anyone else's sufferer did this and what is going on? He's always said he doesn't have flashbacks as such - certainly not violent ones - but I'm starting to wonder what is going on and if there's anything I can do to help whilst it is going on?

 

[amethist]

Hi Toria

I have seen this in my husband too. All I do is quietly ask him if he is OK, then keep everything calm until he is back on a level playing field.

He told me once it was just him drifting but not disassociating as such, more off in a bit of a day dream. I have noticed this usually happens when something is either bothering him, but not PTSD connected, or he too has not slept well for a few nights.

May not be the same as your husband, but maybe possible.

Amethist

 

[Ted Moen]

Evenings are a challenge for some of us. Our ability to generate a chemical "flight, fight or freeze" response to daily stressors has beend enhanced by our traumatic experience, and our ability to generate the chemical response to counter the "flight, fight or freeze" response has been damaged by the level our "flight, fight or freeze" response was activated over a period of time. The result is that even on our good days the normal daily stressors just build and build until by evening we are "spaced out." Thoughts and feelings are swarming around so fast in our minds we can't focus on anything, just momentarily watch or feel the passing thoughts and feelings.

I used to try to write stuff in the evening, but it seldem made any sense when I reread it the next day. Frequently there were negative thoughts or feelings passing, and the stuff I wrote became pretty negative. I currently use computer games, mindless ones like freecell or spider solitaire to distract me while that kind of stuff is passing, though as I have learned to manage the amount of stress in my life I end up in that "spaced out" place less and less.

I also learned that if I wasn't very careful, I could be pretty confrontational with my carer in that mood. So I sometimes just leave the room and go someplace safer, and come back when the mood has passed.

Ted

 

[OKRADLAK]

I space out. Sometimes I am totally "back there". Sometimes my brain is just kind of frozen.Sometimes I am thinking about a million things, sometimes just overwhelmed with emotions.....

Either way, if he can't tell you or won't, you can't know for sure what it is..........