Want To Say Thank You And I'll Catch You Sometime

[Fadeaway]

@Sammyiam You have never once offended me or made me feel bad in chat yet you have apologized to me for it and I could never understand why. I know about a week ago ago I said hi to you in chat and then told you I would be back in 3 minutes and never came back. I want you to know it had nothing to do with you. I was so upset about not getting back to you and you thinking I left because of you. I was looking forward to chatting with you that night but my husband ended up having a GERD attack and aspirating on stomach acid in his sleep.

You know whats so great about this site and helps me the most? Knowing I am not the only one struggling so bad with stupid illness. PTSD is so isolating because most people just don't get it. So you may feel like you are being a downer all the time, but what I see is a kindred spirit. Someone who gets it.

I am going to ask you to stay out my own pure selfishness. Why? Because you are needed here and I don't want you to go.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Sammy please do not go away from the forum because I would miss you so very much.

You have never hurt me nor anyone else that i have noticed.

I see you as a cheeful, bright, kind and thoughtful person. I think you are being too way hard on yourself right now and I would love to just give you a great big hug and tell you how much I have enjoyed knowing you.

You are so important to the forum. I look forward to reading what you have to say. You are a very special and wonderful person and I so wish you could see this right now. I will miss you very much if you have left already. Big hugs.

 

[The Albatross]

Sammy don't step on your oxygen line. If this is personally truly not assistive for you at this time that is one thing... quite another based on your opening post. Not sure what led up to this, but I think I would reassess or at least address with key members who you think you've disturbed before you leave. I'm worried about you now.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I am as well Alby. I am very concerned for her.

 

[Lionheart]

Oh Sammy I Ammy, (as I like to call you) Please reconsider, I think you come across as very caring and genuine person and I would miss you if you were to leave.

 

[hodge]

I hope you come back, Sammy. You are a kind and thoughtful person. You have never, ever offended me or anyone else I could see. I think you are perhaps going through some paranoia? I know what that's like. Please let us know you're okay.

 

[ms spock]

However, I hope you reconsider and keep staying around, visible, and don't give into the false idea that you are not good enough to be around here. That sounds like a distorted thought that comes from an abuser.

Please disagree with that distorted thought, please disagree with your abusers, and claim your right to be visible and here and loved and cared about just as you are!

It is hard when the abusers voices are louder and drown out our own!

Besides, it looks like @Ms Spock is getting the chat room decorated for the best chat room disco party EVER, an it just wouldn't be the same without you. :hug:

And have a look around in the chat room - it is quite a good upgrade if I don't say so myself! :D

 

[ms spock]

***gets down and Blames it on the Boogie with @Sammyiam, @scout86, @Purplemunchkin, @Link Removed, @Junebug, @digger, @Jass_T. @The Albatross, @Lionheart777, @gizmo, @hodge, @Ms Spock :D @Fadeaway, @Tanishq, @Changeling, @Recovery4Me, @Justmehere (if I missed anyone please let me know!)

 

[mrsps]

Sammy!!! I have only just found this thread now

Please stay on here, we all love you!
I totally understand writing and deleting and re writing trying to get it sounding right as to not offend anyone, but you haven't as far as I have seen ever offended anyone. You are such a kind gentle person and I know you are going through a rough time but that is all the more reason for you to stay on here so we can give you the support you need.
Removing yourself from here is not going to help you, as you need the support. Please listen to everyone on here and don't believe the stuff your head is telling you because it is telling you lies.
Please can you come back on to let us know you are ok

XX much love
Mrsps

 

[Sammyiam]

1. @scout86, @Purplemunchkin, @Link Removed, @Junebug, @digger, @Jass_T. @The Albatross, @Lionheart777, @gizmo, @hodge, @Ms Spock @Fadeaway, @Tanishq, @Changeling, @Recovery4Me , @Justmehere, @mrsps.
   
   I'm sorry for having a meltdown, it wasn't any one thing and definitly not anything to do with chat @Fadeaway. It is just me and my life, I think I have offended people and done something wrong and am going to get into trouble most days. Yes I agree with most of you it is the voice of the abuser, and my mother, it just gets so big inside my head that it over comes me. I am having lots of family trouble and my sister hasn't spoken to myself and my brothers since a few days after Mum died. A little while before my mum died (3 months ago ) she said to me after I had told her a little about my past ( I wish I hadn't now ) she said everything would be ok as she wanted to be my mum and look after me and help me through all this stuff. That only lasted a few weeks mum died and then our family has blown it's self apart. (All over a small amount of money )
   
   My Mum wasn't a mum to me and always did what she could to mentally hurt me even meeting people she would never say my name just, this is my youngest I don't know what went wrong with this one, then she would go on to say I wsh she was like her sister, the never been hugged by her, never once did she say I love you, even as a small child not once. The one time I touched her she pulled away from me that was 15 years ago the day my dad died. I think all the negative things she has always done to me just makes me always think I'm never good enough, ugly fat and a horrible person, that most people would want to run a mile from me. I always wished I was someone better so she would love me and even now she is dead I dream about it in nightmares most nights thinking that I'm just something really horrible that no one wants to know or wants to run away from.
   
   I never ever want to hurt anyone, say something that would hurt someone's feelings, get told off, as I have lived my whole life knowing how much pain that causes and never want anyone to feel what I have felt my whole life.
   
   I'm really sorry for having this meltdown and reading everyone's replies made me cry, I'm dripping tears all over my I pad. I'm sorry that I made anyone worried if I was ok. I really like this place and all of you guys are so nice to me and very kind and I feel like you are all wonderful people.
   
   I really want to thank you all and I will try harder not to let my voices get louder than all of your voices.
   
   Thank you so much everyone.
   
   Sammy

 

[Deleted member 28740]

@Sammyiam Thank you Sammy. Personal meltdown myself, and some of that family. You are helping me. Not alone. It is ok to have a voice and it does not have to whisper. I get so sick, sick of stuffing down my feelings.

 

[Chava]

You've never hurt me @Sammyiam ...but you have helped me and I am so grateful because it's really hard for me to access help. Means a lot to me. !!!
Please stay , or come back. :hug::hug: Meltdowns are okay. Helps all of us feel more "normal",.