Way Out Of My Comfort Zone

[jaccat]

So tomorrow is the day I've got a 100 mile drive for a work training session. It's probably twice as far again as I've ever driven in my eight years of driving, and on a motorway, which I've never driven on before.

It seems a stupid thing to get anxious about. I've done the journey as a passenger several times. I know its not difficult, I know in reality it's not even that far, but to me it seems like I'm tackling the impossible. Right now I'm doing the I'm not getting anxious because I'm not thinking about it, not, thing.

I put myself in this situation, and I know when it comes to it I'll do the journey and I'll probably be fine. But somehow I've got to get a good nights sleep before then.

I'm not irrationally afraid of driving. I have been in several car accidents as a passenger, some really quite serious. I was made to get into my mother's car on a daily basis knowing she was unfit. Weirdly she wasn't the driver in any of the accidents. I'm never going to take driving as just something you do. But it also has something to do with forcing me out of my comort zone. I stay in this town way too much, because.

I really want to be able to do this. If I can feel comfortable doing this drive I can go anywhere right? If.

 

[scout86]

If I can feel comfortable doing this drive I can go anywhere right?

Right! Although there may be a few steps along the way. All it is is a combination of a bunch of much shorter trips. If it's 5 miles to the grocery store, this is going to the store and back 20 times. Maybe a month of trips to the store? You can do that, right?

 

[Neverthesame]

I get like that, I find it easier to be a passenger. I still am super alert even though I am not driving. I imagine that it is because I don't really have to be. If something should happen, I know that it wouldn't be my fault as there would be nothing I could really do anyway. If I am driving however, a lapse of focus could spell disaster. It would be my fault as I was driving. (Still a tad irrational I know, but I am getting better with it). Still hate driving though.

After many years of being passenger, I have at least learned to stop stomping on the invisible brake pedal in the passenger footwell. Lol.

Good luck tomorrow.

 

[shimmerz]

I really want to be able to do this. If I can feel comfortable doing this drive I can go anywhere right? If.

Not if, but when. This is super exciting! Good for you for stepping out! It is great exposure therapy!

 

[scout86]

If something should happen, I know that it wouldn't be my fault as there would be nothing I could really do anyway.

And I feel better driving, because there IS something I can do about it. LOL Funny how that works!

 

[Deleted member 20280]

Sending :hug:s for your journey.

:)

 

[allbetter]

Good day!!! To the OP, I felt the same way today. Actually feel the same anytime I want to leave the house and drive somewhere. For me its a semi fear of the unknown, unexpected. Its never stupid to have a dash of anxiety driving!!! To many turds on the road. Try a motorcycle :), then the car won't seem as bad. My heart, start your day slow aye, if possible. Setup a reward for yourself when you make back safe!! You can do it!! Side note for anyone. Keep note of how your talking to yourself. Funny thing most overlook. If you had someone in your life that talked to you the way you talk to yourself would you be friends with them? Honestly. ? Have fun tomorrow!!

 

[Anarchy]

I'm a really bad passenger.

I know that there are plenty of people who drive far more miles than I do, but for most of the past 24 years I've been averaging about 50,000 miles a year (British average for a car is about 10 to 12k miles a year). I've done Swindon to Geordie land and back again already this week.

Check you have plenty of screenwash before you set off - If you are in the northern half of Britain, you'll probably be washing lots of salt spray off your windscreen.

Leave plenty of time for the journey, feel free to pull off for a tea or a rest at a services if you are getting tense (if you don't feel happy going into the actual services, you can still use their car parking).

as Scout has already said, it's great therapy.

If motorway driving still bothers you after this, there is no shame in finding a nice calm driving instructor to give you some coaching on motorway driving, or even doing your advance driving.

Good luck and hope you have a good time tomorrow.

 

[Laurie McLaughlin]

I rejoice that you are getting out there and doing it - Good for you

For me when I have a situation like this, I work with staying in the moment. Each time my mind takes me to some place in the past or in the future, I simply and compassionately bring my mind back to the present moment.

I can only control the now and if I am focused on the now, then I am in more control. Past stuff that happened is no longer happening and future is not real. I simply stay present and drive, constantly monitoring what is going on around me.

Hope things go well for you

Namaste - Laurie

 

[jaccat]

Arggh! Panicking now. I should have set off half an hour ago at the latest but my stupid car decided today of all days the battery was going to die. I'm still at home, waiting for the recovery truck. I am going to go, I don't care if I'm late. I'm not going to let them rearrange it for another day that's inconvenient to me. But sitting here not able to do anything is massively ramping up my anxiety. And I wasn't too bad to start with. Why today of all days?

 

[Recovery4Me]

:hug: Hope you get a good battery! Better to have it happen at home where you can keyboard about it then on the road. :tup: Safe journey.

 

[allbetter]

Second that!!! Way better that didn't happen down there. Pretty sure the answer to that has something to do with Murphy and his dang law :( Hope you make it! Would like to hear how it goes. You can dooooo it!