What do you do to cheer yourself up?

[Changing4Best]

OK, he died in 1973, so, yes, these paintings were displayed after his death, no question as to that. I was involved in that artists' group in 1990, if I recall, so that was well after his death. I'm not sure if these works had ever been displayed before he died, but I am guessing you may be right about that. He may well have done them as therapy and never intended to display them. Good point! I did like some of his other works, especially his works in pottery. So I did not dislike everything he did. No. I had just been SO turned off by those works, that everything else took a "back seat" by compare.

 

[Changing4Best]

I just reviewed a lot of my life. My marriage was to a man who did not really appreciate art. He knew nearly nothing about it and made no effort to learn anything about it either. He made crude jokes about artists, and here I was, an artist, and his wife.

He worked on the waterfront as a longshoreman and had no real contact with the art world, other than through me. I never got him to go to a museum with me or to view an art show or anything, except that maybe he went to a few local shows that my work was displayed in. He did not understand art and had no use for it.

Really, he did not understand ME! I had been artistic since the earliest I can remember. My parents told me that I painted on the walls next to my crib, with the cold cream that was on the dresser next to it when I was maybe 2 1/2 yrs old. They said it took 8 coats of paint to cover it! That was my first artistic experience. From there, of course, it was crayons, until my grandmother bought me a set of oils when I was 6! I painted a few paintings then, but I didn't really start to excel at art until I was in the 4th grade or so, if I recall. However, I had always wanted to be an artist, and had basically known I would do it all my life from a very young age.

However, when I fell in love, it was his sense of humor that I fell in love with. I never bothered to find out if he liked art or not! I was just head over heals in love, because he made me laugh and that was just so rare that I grabbed it and never let go. The fact that he never respected my career didn't so much matter until later, when he started to make jokes about artists. I didn't know what to do with that. It hurt, but I never admitted that. I tried to ignore it, I guess. That didn't make it hurt any less though....

So now I have done anything but cheer myself up. SIGH.... thinking was something he always said was a dangerous thing to do! I have to agree with him on that. At least thinking about things that have upset one in the past anyway. Even so, I miss him so. He died in 2005. And my best friend who used to make me laugh, she moved 100s of miles away from here not long ago, so now I have no one who makes me laugh anymore, and I am so sad. "Laughter is the best medicine" they say. I have believed that all my life!

 

[hodge]

OK, he died in 1973, so, yes, these paintings were displayed after his death, no question as to tha...

I understand.I hope he wouldn't have chosen to display them. I like some of his stuff. I hope I get some warning before I die so I can throw out my obnoxious therapy paintings!

 

[hodge]

I'm so sorry your husband didn't appreciate your art. Glad he made you laugh, though.

I would love to see some of your paintings some time. Are they posted on a website anywhere? Some of mine are on Fine Art America. I'll pm you my real name if you want to see.

 

[Changing4Best]

Since I ended up homeless, lost all my works of art and basically also lost my online galleries when websites like Geocities and others that I had them on died, I know of nowhere online where my works of art are still up for the viewing. But yes, please do PM me. I'd LOVE to see yours.

 

[Changing4Best]

I understand.I hope he wouldn't have chosen to display them. I like some of his stuff. I hope I get some w...

I had to laugh when you called some of your works "obnoxious" because that is what these works of his were! Exactly. He might have rolled over in his grave if he had known that anyone dared to display them!

 

[Changing4Best]

Speaking of things to try to cheer me up, I just ordered a book online, which I think folks looking to cheer themselves up might find helpful:

Overcoming Trauma and PTSD: A Workbook Integrating Skills from ACT, DBT, and CBT (A New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook) Paperback – December 1, 2012
by Sheela Raja Ph.D

I cannot vouch for the book or anything yet, though I did read what I could online before purchasing it and it did give me some hope that it could help me.

 

[Deleted member 37474]

To cheer up, I hang out with my best friend and her two year old. I call her daughter "my heart." This little one will purposely climb up on the couch and wiggle in next to me. She is so little and excited about all things. Curious, innocent and playful. Everything good in the world is embodied in a toddler (that you can give back, lol).

 

[Changing4Best]

Well, I guess I should answer my own Q!

This morning I saw a homeless woman, so I went over to her and asked her if I could pray with her. She agreed, so I did. I then asked her if I could take her to MacDonald's for breakfast. She said they would not allow her in there, so I offered to go and get her something there. She finally agreed, wanted a Sweet Tea, a buscuit with pancake syrup, and that was all. She didn't want an Egg McMuffin or anything heavy, and I asked! So I got her what she asked for.

I guess it makes me feel better, cheers me up, to help someone who is worse off than I am. Kind of puts things in perspective, ya know? I was homeless once for 2-3 yrs, so I can spot a homeless person from a mile away. We have a certain "look" about us, even if we are clean and taking care of ourselves. She was clean, she is even pretty, but I am pretty sure she is on drugs, so that was why I did not give her money, just did what I did.

I was not on drugs or anything like that when I was homeless. I had just fallen on hard times, lost everything I owned, when I had to place my husband in a nursing home. We lost our business (which had been our home too), all our belongings and everything, because there was no law to protect a business from the nursing home taking it. So I gave it back to the bank, rather than let them have it! There wasn't a thing that they could do about it, either. I thought I would be able to find a job, but that didn't happen, so I ended up homeless until I got my Di$ability.

 

[hodge]

How lovely, SheilaKathy. Bless you!

(Though I wish she would have opted for some protein. Oh, well.)

 

[Deleted member 37085]

You know for me it all is very contingent on just how much "cheering up" I need @SheilaKathy...for like you I too turn to reading self-help books all types that have to do with whatever is eating at me...Also like @Ronin I love music and will escape into either deep emotional music, or nature cds' of wind, ocean, night sounds, etc.

Also, like @Tornadic Thoughts, I am one to isolate and lick my wounds and I pray also and for others...I cry...oh so cleansing...to cry out loud and hear my self...instead of what I used to do..cut, and S/I (self-harm), etc. Also, I too just like @hodge, and you, am missing my beloved "Baby" animal shelter rescue maltese. (Crying...) I miss her so much...and I don't know if I could take on another pup for they too have so many physical, emotional needs like us...they for me are human...and I miss my precious "Baby" oh so much. Her actual name was "Baby Precious"...what an angel...she was cremated... and now is atop my coffee table in front of couch. I miss her every day...she passed in 2007...

Thank you for this thread...(((hugs!)))

 

[Deleted member 37085]

Well, I guess I should answer my own Q!

This morning I saw a homeless woman, so I went over to her...

Good for you not allowing the cruel nursing home where your husband was to get everything! !@#$%@$%!!! Ohhh, this burns me up! So sorry about loss of your husband...and oh so loving and kind of you @SheilaKathy to care for this precious homeless woman! I like you...yep I do! Oh yes!!!