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What To Never Say To A Ptsd Sufferer
- Post starter FightingLily
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Lucycat
Sponsor
Shall I pm you her address?
Me neither until just now. Well, I've learnt something today!
How kind of you Hashi. No, I am not OK emotionally and spiritually. My health has been poor, exhausted all the time. I saw my Dr. today and got some blood tests and a flu shot. It seems to me that my flashbacks are more frequent and the "hangover" time may take days rather than hours.
I try to do what is asked of me but with a fault finding husband hardly anything is right. That is triggering or embarrassing. I don't like to be shamed in public but heaven forbid that I let him know that he had just dumped on me. I have no escape. I guess I married what I knew as far as verbal negativity goes. I'm feeling worthless and helpless, trapped and dependant .
I try to do what is asked of me but with a fault finding husband hardly anything is right. That is triggering or embarrassing. I don't like to be shamed in public but heaven forbid that I let him know that he had just dumped on me. I have no escape. I guess I married what I knew as far as verbal negativity goes. I'm feeling worthless and helpless, trapped and dependant .
@Mercy, I'm so sorry. I wish there was something I could say. I wish there was some way I could help. For what it's worth, I can't understand how this must feel, but I feel for your pain and am sending you support. Would it help to start a new thread on the forum, to get more support here?
I'm so sorry you're going through this, and that you're feeling this.
I'm so sorry you're going through this, and that you're feeling this.
PurpleSurvivor
Bronze Member
"Think the words 'positive love'. It works on everything."
...
When I'm out of words it's serious.
...
When I'm out of words it's serious.
rainy_daze
Diamond Member
@Solara , I had always thought Katy Perry (was she even the lyric writer for Hot N Cold? I might check up on that later) was meaning "got a case of a love bipolar" in the context of:
having or relating to two poles or extremities.
"a sharply bipolar division of affluent and underclass"
Which was the entire theme of the song - a relationship which involved her partner constantly running hot and cold, being kind and unkind, and so on. I don't think it's a song about making fun of mentally ill people in any way. You're completely entitled to your opinion though, and I can see that song upset you, so I'll shut up, but I felt it was necessary to give my point of view there, as I love that song. It really hurts when something in pop culture/media upsets you - I've been there before, especially in the context of people confusing PTS (post-traumatic stress) with PTSD, or implications that people with PTSD are crazy and/or lose cannons about to erupt. Still, I'm beginning to be more aware of being overly sensitive to some things as well, and it helps when people tell me their point of view on things. Hopefully I've done the same for you, and not furthered your dislike of Katy Perry :(.
I would suggest never to say the words You sound so much better after I've told you I spent the entire day crying. I know these words come from a caring place, but really, it's like you didn't hear the words I just said, only that my tone sounded lighter :meh:.
having or relating to two poles or extremities.
"a sharply bipolar division of affluent and underclass"
Which was the entire theme of the song - a relationship which involved her partner constantly running hot and cold, being kind and unkind, and so on. I don't think it's a song about making fun of mentally ill people in any way. You're completely entitled to your opinion though, and I can see that song upset you, so I'll shut up, but I felt it was necessary to give my point of view there, as I love that song. It really hurts when something in pop culture/media upsets you - I've been there before, especially in the context of people confusing PTS (post-traumatic stress) with PTSD, or implications that people with PTSD are crazy and/or lose cannons about to erupt. Still, I'm beginning to be more aware of being overly sensitive to some things as well, and it helps when people tell me their point of view on things. Hopefully I've done the same for you, and not furthered your dislike of Katy Perry :(.
I would suggest never to say the words You sound so much better after I've told you I spent the entire day crying. I know these words come from a caring place, but really, it's like you didn't hear the words I just said, only that my tone sounded lighter :meh:.
In the early days of therapy, H used what little I had shared against me. He would use it against me to win an arguement /difference of opinion over how to teach our #2 daughter, for example, what 4yr olds need to learn like table manners. He would say, 'Just because you had a lousy childhood, that doesn't matter now for #2D.' I had told him a little bit. Yet, he used it to put me down as a mother - I am overreacting and his way is right. I stopped sharing anything from therapy for the next 15 years. He didn't ever ask how #2D and had spent our day. It was so painful to hear him talk about office blab while I was so torn apart.
DharmaGirl
VIP Member
One ex-friend said to me, "my son has a mental illness, you just have some sort of mood thing". Really? Good to know.
Me: *explains how a flashback feels, and how you just can't breathe during them sometimes*
Non-sufferer friend: "yeah, I know what you mean"
Me: "...........you know what a trauma flashback feels like?"
Non-sufferer friend: *defensively* "hey, I DO have empathy you know..."
Yes. Of course. Empathy equates to knowing everything I'm feeling. Thankyou for invalidating my experience!
Non-sufferer friend: "yeah, I know what you mean"
Me: "...........you know what a trauma flashback feels like?"
Non-sufferer friend: *defensively* "hey, I DO have empathy you know..."
Yes. Of course. Empathy equates to knowing everything I'm feeling. Thankyou for invalidating my experience!
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