What was the absolute "low point" of your life and how did you get out of it (if you don't mind talking about it) ?

[Applecore]

I suppose I do.

On a real downer today.

I'm exhausted after the allergy I mentioned got worse and ended in a hospital visit.

My car is wrecked after an RTC so I have no transport. My boss was kind of an arsehole about it, given my 40+ mile commute. I had to had to get my dad to take two hours out of his day to drive me there.

Then my wife broke the news about the divorce to the kids while I was at work. I can only imagine the things she probably told them.

I started messaging my BFF and noticed Cake Girl was no longer a valid WhatsApp contact.

We're in the charity group chat, which handily popped up with a little notification that she has a new phone number.

Fair enough. She got a new phone. Poked the prompt and it updated her number.

By then I was already spiralling, though.

My BFF got some bad news of her own and wants to be left alone.

So I'm on here bitching to you guys. I haven't got anyone else.I know this isn't what this place is for, but I'm hanging on by my fingernails.

Your kids will grow up some day and know you on their own terms. If I had kids, I think I might want to look forward to that day and imagine how it looks. You could write the scene here if you think it might be a nice idea.

 

[CooCoo4CocoaPuffs]

I was searching online how to end myself but my dog (at the time, RIP) looked at me with his big, beautiful brown eyes and I just had to keep going for his sake (I had literally nothing else to live for.) Now I’m in a long-term marriage and have children that I thought I’d never be able to have. Sometimes, life is hard but I’m grateful 99% of the time to be alive. *hugs*

 

[Applecore]

I was searching online how to end myself but my dog (at the time, RIP) looked at me with his big, beautiful brown eyes and I just had to keep going for his sake (I had literally nothing else to live for.) Now I’m in a long-term marriage and have children that I thought I’d never be able to have. Sometimes, life is hard but I’m grateful 99% of the time to be alive. *hugs*

Have you seen that Netflix show, Afterlife? The same thing happens in that.

 

[CooCoo4CocoaPuffs]

Have you seen that Netflix show, Afterlife? The same thing happens in that.

No? Is it a triggerfest? I will check it out, thanks!

 

[Applecore]

No? Is it a triggerfest? I will check it out, thanks!

Depends what triggers you. It's Ricky Gervais, who I usually don't like because he is so nasty. But it's interesting how he turns around a nasty, suicidal character into one that is no longer suicidal and less nasty. Very interesting case study for most of us here.

Here's the trailer: After Life (TV Series 2019–2022) 8.4 | Comedy, Drama

 

[Ecdysis]

I know this isn't what this place is for,

Heh... yeah, course it is. I think that's pretty much what we're all doing.

 

[Captain Barnacles]

Heh... yeah, course it is. I think that's pretty much what we're all doing.

I'm not supposed to need help. I'm supposed to be the one who turns up and makes everything better. I'm not supposed to let people see this or impose upon them with it.

 

[Applecore]

I'm not supposed to need help. I'm supposed to be the one who turns up and makes everything better. I'm not supposed to let people see this or impose upon them with it.

You know that's not true, surely.

 

[Ecdysis]

I'm not supposed to need help. I'm supposed to be the one who turns up and makes everything better. I'm not supposed to let people see this or impose upon them with it.

Haha... Join the club... Or, I suppose go find a forum for people who don't need help and who support everyone else...?

 

[Captain Barnacles]

Haha... Join the club... Or, I suppose go find a forum for people who don't need help and who support everyone else...?

That's what I usually do.

You know that's not true, surely.

It's a rule I made myself- I have to earn help, you know? By helping other people, mostly. I haven't done enough yet.

It's really hard to focus on typing just now because the guilt is turning to panic.

I'm sorry. Please don't hate me for this.

 

[Applecore]

That's what I usually do.

It's a rule I made myself- I have to earn help, you know? By helping other people, mostly. I haven't done enough yet.

It's really hard to focus on typing just now because the guilt is turning to panic.

I'm sorry. Please don't hate me for this.

This guilt - is it about the reason your wife gives you for wanting a divorce?

From my point of view, you seem to be saying: "I'm sorry. Please don't hate me for this"

...to her and to your kids, to the universe and to yourself.

 

[Captain Barnacles]

This guilt - is it about the reason your wife gives you for wanting a divorce?

From my point of view, you seem to be saying: "I'm sorry. Please don't hate me for this"

...to her and to your kids, to the universe and to yourself.

The guilt is for wanting help. I'm supposed to help other people. Not being able to help myself and making demands on others' feels like an unforgivable transgression. I'm only allowed to relinquish control and allow myself to be helped if the injury happens in the service of someone else.- Those are the rules. I'm breaking them by being here.

I've always felt like that, for as long as I can remember.

The divorce happened because I fell in love with my partner at my last job. We never actually did anything, but our feelings for each other were apparently obvious to everyone.