Poll What's Ok To Post On Social Media?

[Deleted member 1860]

Whoa this is gonna be a long one!


Personal Medical Issues?...........Those that it matters to, I will inform them personally. I don't need the whole world knowing about anything medical. And more importantly, given that NO social media is guaranteed to be 100% secure, would you want a future employer to know about any of your health issues? Even something mundane could come back and bite you in the arse.

Asking for prayer or Special Thoughts?..........I feel weird asking. Actually I go straight to the source and ask for myself ie God. The only go between is an archangel I may call on. I think its odd to ask for prayers for yourself. I have learned after the fact that I've had prayers said for me and I was like huh well that explains a lot....

Things about being PTSD?..........Given that stigmatization is rampant, why would you do this? Its akin to shooting yourself in the foot in regards to future employment and saying gee, I want to give employers a reason to discriminate against me and not hire me!

Things about having been abused?...........Again, why? For the attention?

Things about having been raped or molested?...........See above.

Things about the war you served in?..........n/a

Your mood of the moment?............I don't know why people do this, either. This one can come back and bit you in the arse as well, especially if it makes you seem like a very angry person or fill in the blank with any negative emotion that is bad in excess.

In terms of what others post, I really don't give a damn. I have wanted to smack a few people I've seen post all of their vacation pics and such while they were on vacation.....on the other side of the globe. I think the girl was valedictorian a few years behind me. A book smart person who is incredibly common sense stupid.

 

[J_trustno1]

I've selected "other" and my reasons for this are given below based on past experiences:

1. 80% people don't give a shit about what you or anyone is going through and majority of them will actually feel happy that you or others are struggling and facing shit in life. I am saying this from personal experience.

2. the rest of 17% will include those that will a) ridicule you or b) try taking advantage of your vulnerability or c) ditch you because they don't want to be around someone sad or who brings negativity into their lives. Therefore, they end up giving up on a friendship. Again from personal experience.

3. This is the 3% of those sweethearts who will actually care about what you're going through because they are either very kind hearted, or have been through it themselves or have someone close going through the same. This group is very rare to find in real life let alone social media. Again, this is coming from my personal experience.

I hardly share things on social media now days because of the experiences I have been through. I used to write about my mood and the next day at university I would be asked random questions about why I am writing all those sentimental statements on facebook or sharing those depressing posts. This world is too busy giving other people shit and they forget to clean their own shit. I am sorry for being cynical but that is the reality. It is very difficult to find those genuine people. I mean look at it this way, our own families have deceived us from childhood and how can you expect someone sitting on the other side of the computer not being a perpetrator. I personally believe that when it comes to internet, (expect from this forum since majority of us do understand each other due to our similar experiences of pain), you must have your guards up. It is difficult to trust people in real life yet you are thinking about trusting people on the internet. This whole internet stuff is coming from my personal experiences with people I have met online (not meeting them in real life) that they used my own emotions against me, some ridiculed me about my past and also said statements similar to what my abusers have said to me in the past.

I hope you understand what I mean. I am not saying that everyone on the internet is bad. I have met some lovely people from this forum and some others but not everyone has best interests in you. If you do wish to share something with a stranger or a friend, you must make sure that you trust them enough before letting your guards down. You need to test the water before striking it. I have made lots of stupid mistakes but I am kinda learning from them now unlike before. It would be best for you the share your personal issues in private chat than writing a status on it where everyone can read stuff.

I only share random jokes there or wish people new year or other formal things and I keep personal stuff personal with people I can actually trust. I hope this helped. Lastly, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. Take care :)

 

[darrenS]

i am very careful with what i post, you never know what can come back to bite you and i certainly dont want to share private details on FB. i use it just to catch up with distant friends - i am also careful not to comment in different places under my own name , as even your political and social views can become fodder

 

[Sandstone]

Selected Other, because I'd say never post anything remotely personal or private. Why would you want the world to know? If you want friends or family to know something you can tell them individually, not put up a poster on the street.

I'm honestly mystified by the desire to expose oneself to the world.

 

[Changing4Best]

Thinks for all the replies, folks. I appreciate knowing how others reacted to your posts on Social Media. This gives me a better picture of why a friend kind of didn't want to be seen with me yesterday.

All I did was to ask for prayers as I was having a medical test done in a few days. After I had the test, I mentioned in one of my comments under the original post that the local hospital was now doing 3D mammograms and I felt a lot of relief, knowing I was getting the latest tech ex-ray for the Drs. to look at.

On the other hand, about a dozen of my friends on FB said they were praying for me. In my church, the pastor asks us if anyone needs prayer, and folks ask for prayer for themselves as well as for others. So I felt that this was a normal thing to do. I had no idea that a friend would shun me for doing this. Funny thing is, she is not on FB and heard some gossip about my having done this from someone. She only hinted that it was about me, but I felt and heard in her voice and reactions to me what she really meant. She would not tell ME the gossip, but she probably told others. Also, gossip is considered to be a sin in our faith, but I am doing my best not to judge, as that is not an acceptable thing for us to do either. SO I live and I learn.

What a mess! I will be more careful and private from now on.

 

[haltija]

I really don't think you did anything wrong. I think some people react that way out of their own insecurities or lack of self-esteem. It sounds like someone was playing a game of telephone and things were misconstrued somewhere along the way. The difficult thing about what you post online isn't the same as what you say out loud. There's no emotion or tone of voice and people can confuse their own feelings with what you're actually saying.

I may not be religious anymore, but I had a Christian upbringing and where I come from, church (two or more people) wasn't a place to be perfect, but a hospital for the broken and asking for prayer was perfectly acceptable and encouraged, so I'm not sure why she would react in such a way. I suppose that's something that is sort of to each their own. I'm really sorry that you had to grow through that and I really wish you the best for you and your health.

Also, there's always the "hide post from ..." button. ;)

 

[scout86]

I agree that that doesn't sound "wrong". I'm pretty paranoid about social media sites, so I don't post much. But I know lots of people who do. Including that they are having medical issues and would appreciate prayers. My best guess is that it hasn't caused them problems, because they continue to do it. I've gone to a number of churches like you describe and I honestly thought the whole "praying for people" and asking to be prayed for was kind of cool. The church I was raised in was very cold and reserved, which was one reason I gave up on the whole idea of God for a long time.

All in all, there are what I think of as "security risks" involved with sharing stuff through social media, and the risk of being misunderstood, but I think, if you got a bad reaction to what you said, it says more about the people doing the reacting than it does about what you said.

Glad to hear your potential medical problem is ok and 3-D mammograms sound pretty cool!

 

[Spiderallis]

Other- because I'd never post any of those things. Like a few others mentioned, my accounts have been monitored by abusers. My family is a bunch of gossips too, so I don't give them anything to talk about. I post jokes, music videos I like, and hobby stuff. Nothing ever shows a location, I don't mention any plans, and there's hardly any photos.