Where Is The Understanding Of Ptsd In Schools

[AmyO]

I was so angry the other day and I couldn't believe what my son's T was telling me when she called the principal of my sons school. Here is a quick rundown...My youngest son has been repeatedly triggered by one teacher at his school. He goes into these tantrums and they don't know how to respond to them so they aggravate it to the point of full blown rage. Hitting, throwing, and such.

I have tried to be supportive of the school and a lack of knowledge about PTSD. I have even offered to go and show them how to get him to calm himself quicker. I stopped being supportive of them when my child started coming home with marks under and on his arms from being "restrained". And now he refers to mommy as a B....So I had his T call them to explain what to do. You think they would listen to a Dr. right?

She told the principal that it was going to take time but we had to be in a mutual understanding of my sons PTSD. He in turn told her that didn't help them right now and that asking them to learn how to treat his outbursts would be like him asking her to teach him math.

I am not expecting the system to change overnight, but with the increasing cases of children with trauma backgrounds (some even misdiagnosed as being ADHD) shouldn't we start trying to teach our children with compassion instead of teaching them more anger.

 

[Iron_Angel]

I know that schools are increasingly being asked to deal with behavioral and emotional issues in children. This is just a fact of life as things are today, and they need to realize that and deal with it. I had an awful time with one of my son's teachers when he was in Gr. 3. The guy just couldn't understand that my son needed some calming from time to time, and this was 20 years ago.

When a new principal came to the school, things changed radically. He recognized that many of the issues at this inner-city school were related to tough times the children had gone through. He knew that their personal problems affected learning, and he did what he could to make sure he provided the best learning environment possible. That included calming music played after recess and lunch breaks, small peer group work (it was amazing how the kids helped each other, even at a young age!), and plenty of professional development for his teachers. He blessed a lot of lives with his caring approach.

Maybe that's a question for the school board next time they have a meeting?

 

[Vee Lagrome]

That is just... infuriating. Unfortunately, it seems like most schools are more concerned with cramming as many kids as will fit in a classroom and making sure they all shut up and stay still. I can appreciate the concerns the teachers have, being stressed out and stretched to the brink of craziness, but since they do play such an important role in the students' lives, they should be willing to learn a couple of things that will bring peace to the classroom more quickly and will serve a good example to the rest of the students as to how to deal with someone who is becoming very emotional and how to calm down when you are becoming very emotional.

Have you addressed the particular things his teacher does that trigger him? What exactly do they say when you offer to show them how to handle his tantrums without manhandling him? I don't understand it at all, and I would really hate to think that the school is just being lazy, since they do often try to avoid lawsuits and generally do care about the children, but I don't know your situation, the teachers, or the school.

But anyway, I found this article about the things parents should think about if they are considering filing a complaint against the school (I don't know if you're in the US or not, but I think the article is a good read either way).

[DLMURL]http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/168165/how_to_file_a_formal_complaint_with.html[/DLMURL]

I really hope that things can be resolved in the best possible way for your son and his classmates.

 

[anthony]

I understand the problem from the other side though, being if one student requires special attention that detracts from teaching the remainder, then where do teachers who are already pressed to the limits, over-worked, under-paid, draw the line?

It is like someone coming onto this forum requiring special attention outside of what is considered appropriate behaviour here... they are a distraction to the majority, so unfortunately become removed and must seek more individual attention from someone who has that ability and time to allocate.

Teachers are expected to be teachers, baby sitters, therapists, medics, disciplinarians and the list just keeps going on. I get where you are coming from, but I also see the other side of the issue, in that taking care off and dealing with mental health, is not in the normal or acceptable realms of their role as a teacher, and honestly should not be expected. A student with mental health matters should reasonably expect to attend a school that has teachers specifically trained to handle such issues and be more focused upon them.

Just my two cents on that topic.

Oh... I don't agree with the bruises aspect... that is all bad.

 

[becvan]

I have so been right where you are Amy. Do you have an IEP? (Individual Education Plan) Or something along those lines for disabled children? If you are able to get something along those lines it will really help. It's the guideline for the teachers and principal for what they should and should not do. Here it's done in a combination with the principal, school counsellors, therapists and doctors and the parent. It took years of me fighting before I got one.

You would think with the huge push for resources for ADHD and what not in the schools they would know better but it's not how they work. What happens here, is the government only gives them funding to help kids with specific disorders (as in the popular ones like ADHD.) So all their resources get pushed to that area and all others get neglected basically.PTSD is actually very rare in schools and they have almost no knowledge of it. Teach them about it without telling them you are, just by advocating for what your son needs.

When my son was in grade school it took him going into a mental health program in the hospital for 2 months to get them to do an IEP. The hospital brought him to school everyday with a therapist so the school could not ignore it. Before that I really feel like I was fighting a losing war because no one would listen, not even to the therapists.

I think the school board is exactly where you should be heading right now. Get your son's T to document what he needs at school. Take pictures of the bruises. And start the "harrassment" campagain. Be polite, but firm. Your son needs help, he deserves help, and it is their job to provide it along with you and the T. Don't be afraid to threaten getting a lawyer (I couldn't afford one but threatened the school board with it here anyways.. and they jump through hoops then!) Don't give up.

Feel free to pm me, if you need any ideas , some support or even info on what strategies worked for the IEP.

bec

 

[Iron_Angel]

Anthony is absolutely right that the teachers -- indeed overworked, underpaid, and highly stressed themselves -- cannot provide specialized individual attention to students who need more than the others. Going to school is all about learning how to get along in a group; it's as much a socialization process as an educational one.

Still, schools today do have special education counselors, and have access to the tools and expertise to address special needs. The government demands it as an equity requirement. Segregating students with disabilities is no longer done, in the belief that by keeping them in the mainstream everyone learns how to cope and they don't feel disenfranchised. Twenty-first century classrooms are a mix of cultures, abilities, and issues.

Learning is goal #1, and distractions affect everyone, as Anthony said. Therefore the teacher should identify the issue to her supervisor and ask for help in dealing with it. S/he is obviously not coping very well with it right now.

The IEP bec talks about is a great solution. Really, every child should have one. The days when schools could address the "average" child, leaving the exceptionally bright (aka "gifted") and the ones with special needs on the fringes, are long gone.

My son was given opportunities to go to lower grade classrooms to help the teachers there when he got too antsy for his own class. It was a brilliant strategy. It helped him feel needed, capable, and like he had something to offer. He was always on his best behavior in front of the younger children, and that was a win/win for everyone.

 

[AmyO]

You are right that I do understand the teachers point of view. I worked for a year as a TA for Head Start and worked with 1 teacher in a class of 32 children. It is not an easy task and I do commend a lot of teachers for the jobs they do. My oldest sons teacher is a jewel as she is more of an "old school" teacher and has been teaching for 32 years.

My youngest does have an IEP and the teacher we are having problems with is his special ed teacher. She has a class of 6 kids with 2 TA's working with her. She refers to his problem as PSTD.

I don't work as I have other health issues that keep me from it but I have told them several times that I would come down (every day if I have to) to help keep him calm and have been told no. I even have sat outside the school watching in his class waiting to see what is going on (keeping out of sight of everyone like a parental ninja...lol).

I document all of the marks and working with the county on his behavioral issues, but school is the only place he does it anymore. Don't get me wrong either, my son is no angel 24-7(his horns hold up his halo), but I have noticed some of the problems could be stopped with just 10 seconds of understanding. I have also started petitioning the National board of Ed and got several Child Psychiatrists and trauma centers to send reports to them to start getting a program in place that during summers when the teachers do their trainings (they already have training seminars for Autism and other Physical ailments) to start a compassion care for the changing times.

 

[nie]

AmyO,

I am a teacher in the US. If you are in the US, I would be happy to have a conversation with you about your rights and the rights of your child. As of right how, legally speaking, they are both being violated. Let me know.

 

[AmyO]

Definately. I am in WI. I would love to hear from you. I appreciate and welcome any input where my kids are concerned. I don't know how to personal message but feel free to PM me ( I am computer illiterate in some areas still).

 

[anthony]

I don't understand why they wouldn't allow you to be close and "on call" as such, to help get him into atleast a pattern for easy calming. I get it... I understand that whilst doing that, you are enabling things to a degree, though the process to remedy often starts at enabling and then slowly withdraws, so both your son and teachers progressively have a good balance on handling things, without your interference by the end of the process.

They are obviously at the start of this process, maybe a little out of their depth... as whilst being used to dealing with ADHD children, PTSD is not even close, and depending on severity, the anger would be absolutely uncontrollable at times. Touching an angry person is often the worst thing to do... if anything, one should always step back and only soothe them, if they want it... and if that makes them worse, step back, say nothing and let them calm down. Restraining I get... I understand it, but it should only be used if the person can't calm themself within a reasonable time or is causing risk to the safety of others.

 

[AmyO]

That has been the hardest part. It has progressed him to such a state at times that he has started using pain as a calming tool. I cry for my poor kids sometimes when I see that he has picked his fingernails off to the point that is bleeding and sore. We went to the boys Psych today (yeah, poor kids have two T's) and she had to up his medications again. What child should have to take Abilify, Tenex, and Prozac now?

And I think it was through your help and understanding that made me realize that I was helping to enable a bit. I let my feelings of guilt at not being able to protect them before to cloud my judgement and ignore my PTSD triggers. I created the codependency that I struggle with today and I am utilizing new tools to become a mom again and not another survivor in the family sense.

I struggle with the thought that if I had not let them down before...if I would have looked a little harder at what my ex was doing...would my kids be as injured now? I looked at the fresh marks on his shoulders and back today and when I show them to the county workers and ask why I get told that it is because he has to be restrained and that I should expect them until he learns to calm himself.

I finally got myself an appt for a T, and I hope that I can live with it, but somehow I don't think I will ever just accept someone telling me to "suck it up and deal" again.

 

[nie]

Amy, sent you a message. I hope that you can find it helpful.