I realize the OP is from last year, and I'm sorry I haven't read all the posts. I do not have combat ptsd, but I know from family who worked alongside the military holidays (especially at that time 'Christian' ones) were the highest level of threat/ security, and I know somewhere I read
@Never_falter2 about your Vet fearing an issue with today (Fri the 13th). I am glad he is ok.
Apart from the potential of obvious losses for those who served, grief and survivor's grief, separation from families, +/ or inability to feel at peace re-integrating to Civvie life (and I'm only speaking from limited experience :notworthy: ), I can say however even for non-combat ptsd, it seems very difficult to get through the holidays. Even with a good, or great, attitude. Of course, everyone is different, but I've had 3 arguments in one week (about the same number I'd have in 3 months). I can;t sleep. I have a perpetual headache. I feel sore, crappy & at a loss. Just, -lost. Lately I had the misfortune of it occurring to me someone's suicide past actually had benefits for some others, in a way, which started me questioning- a lot. :(
I think it's because for some people, feeling at the bottom of the barrel is what infringes on the norm, but for others (some with ptsd), the bottom of the barrel is more familiar, and even with the best intentions, when the veneer of life-is-different gets scratched off (by life happenings; thoughts; stress; just realities for that matter), that bottom looks inviting. Because it is avoidance, and it is a surrender of sorts (vs working at being what others want or expect, and trying to find a way to flow in to a culture and activities that either painfully don't apply (carefree joyful supportive family life), or even trying to have hope for the (a) future. Or even believing one has any value at all). JMHO though. Others may feel totally different or have better words than I.
I think we are all glad to have met you too! Sending you much love!
