because it makes the anger stop and nothing else is working right now
So, I know I am a pain in the ass about the exercise but I have found that riding a stationary bicycle as hard and fast as I can for as long as I can helps me to get some of my anger out. I would kick and hit a punching bag or something but my knee and elbow joints would probably turn backwards and that would make me madder.
I used to cut and burn myself. I did it until my early 20s. One day my fiance grabbed ahold of my hand after the fact and with tears in his eyes simply said, "you can never do this again."
I never cut again after that because it was the first time in my life when I realized that someone was genuinely hurting when I cut myself besides me. I do think I doubled up on my smoking, though. I've since quit but at that point in my life, I did what I had to do to exist without killing anyone.
I hope that you are able to find some other way to get the anger out. I still struggle with anger a lot and that pisses me off a lot.
Sorry you are having a hard time.