Why No Emotion?

[ShanaK]

I am just curious....

I am the wife of a PTSD Vet. Im looking for thoughts or reasons why it is hard for PTSD sufferers to feel or show emotions to their loved ones. I know my husband loves me. But he never shows affection anymore...at all. Is it meds? Is it part of the process? Do sufferers get to the point where they are able to show and feel emotion again?

 

[Casey_03]

It could be a lot of different things, but usually it's because the trauma (whatever the trauma was for the sufferer) forced the sufferer into a fight or flight response, in which they couldn't have emotions -- emotions would literally get in the way. So when a sufferer experiences an emotional flashback or a normal flashback, he/she may automatically switch emotions off. As a matter of fact, this is not only when flashbacks are occurring, but could be any time there is stress. It's hard to answer your other two questions without knowing more about your husband's trauma and treatment. I don't think the "numbness" will ever really go away, but I guess some PTSD sufferers can learn to deal with it better, so it won't affect close relationships as much.

 

[EveHarrington]

Numbing is a symptom of PTSD and is listed in the diagnostic criteria. Perhaps it would help you to read over the criteria itself so you're aware of what symptoms are due to PTSD?

The numbness for me comes after a triggering or stressful event. My body goes into overload. It protects itself by going numb. I don't think this symptom will ever disappear because IMHO IME it's part and parcel of my damaged nervous system.

 

[ShanaK]

I have exhausted myself on the symptoms. I just wonder why and does it ever come back. I've read why it is thought to happen but not heard from anyone who has been through it. Sometimes it helps to hear someone's actual story. :)

 

[Casey_03]

It will never fully go away, unfortunately.

 

[EveHarrington]

All of this stuff can come back at any time unfortunately.

 

[Chimera]

Is your husband in therapy, is he in contact with other veterans?
These things will help him, but maybe not you so much..Wishing you both well.

 

[ShanaK]

@EveHarrington my husband is an Investigator. He is always under stress.

 

[ShanaK]

Is your husband in therapy, is he in contact with other veterans?
These things will help him, but mayb...

He is in therapy with the VA. Unfortunately, where we live there are no close support groups with veterans. He thought about going to one about an hour and a half away but all of those vets are divorced. He would like to be able to talk to some who are married. Then other times he doesn't want to talk about it to anyone at all anytime @chime

 

[Chimera]

Is there an option for him to seek therapy outside the VA?
Maybe a more regular schedule? (I am referencing the overloaded VA, and resources I hear many speak of..)

 

[ShanaK]

Is there an option for him to seek therapy outside the VA?
Maybe a more regular schedule? (I am refere...

I would really like for him to and have brought it up to him. However, he doesn't want to talk about it more than once a month as he has to go to VA. I am still dropping suggestions here and there and I am hoping he will come around. I really feel like he needs more. He has only been to two sessions with the VA and so far they have just talked mostly about meds and how most vets wind up divorced if they have PTSD (very encouraging I might add..sarcasm). So at this rate it be a long time before it probably helps him any if he sticks with one appt. a month.

 

[Chimera]

@ShanaK
It's good though, he is going, taking steps in the right direction. Try not to push and I hope neither of you buy into statements that indicate divorce is inevitable. Hopefully you'll consider therapy as well, if you're not already... this site has supporter forums, please take time and look around, so much information and support here..and I'd like to say Welcome to you, hoping for the best for you both.