Wondering Why My Spouse Is Still With Me

[Xenu]

To all those who stay with their PTSD partners...

Thank you. You give me hope I won't die alone.

 

[anthony]

Sucks I know what I am doing wrong I'm not a happy person anymore I dont make her laugh anymore and I cant do anything about it.

The biggest issue... you actually can do something about it if you want. It is your choice as to whether to change or not. PTSD can be managed, it can be controlled for the most part, but you as the sufferer must really decide whether you want too. Otherwise, you come to such conclusions and accept that level of life.

If you know what you're doing wrong, then make a list and work on one thing at a time to improve and change the wrong to a right.

Again, write down what used to make her laugh and that is another goal for you, to move back towards who you where.

How you live with PTSD is your choice, it cannot be cured, but it can be managed and controlled quite well if you choose such.

 

[zoe]

I am not sure there is anything logical about love or that there needs to be. I think age is only a factor if it is between the two of you. As for the physical disability, I would suspect it is more your issue than hers...if she is still there (personal experience) - a wheel chair does not make someone who they are.

Even through the waves of PTSD there can be laughter. There are periods it doesn't seem possible, but it will come if you want it too.

 

[Pam]

Early on, 5 years ago, things were rough but I have known C since I was a little girl. I loved him then as a little girl looking up at a handsome grown young man, and now that we are a couple I love him even more now. I love him for so many reasons, and for none at all. Yes, there were times when he shut himself away and I was nearly unable to cope. But I remembered his service to my country, his contributions to the local community, and his family. And I remember the crush I had on him when I was only 10. And because he is a vet, I know the motto. When the chips are down, you just don't leave anyone behind. Everybody comes home.

 

[Clarity99]

Hi Allan,

Thank you for asking this question. It has brought out some beautiful replies.

I love my boyfriend very much. It doesn't matter how PTSD has changed his behavior, I know PTSD is not WHO he is. I remember our good times and have hope for the future. I also know that every relationship has its challenges, and I'd rather walk through them with the person I love most. Its temporary in the way that there will always be ups and downs. That's life and no one is exempt.

Don't be too hard on yourself.

By the way, "partying" is really not all that its cracked up to be. Many people just don't enjoy that type of scene. Your wife has free will and she is choosing to be with you. :smile:

 

[shiraz]

I have finally realised - deep, deep, down that he stays because he loves me. And that is enough.

He also sees the good in me, the kindness and gratitude and humility and courage and he loves the potential in me for greatness.

He also stays because I love him and i love his journey and I love his happiness and freedom and greatness and ideas about the world.

We stay because along with trust, these are the important things which bind people together and we look past the PTSD and focus only on what is important.

 

[justme]

I stay because I love him and know this is not something he has control over.