Word finding difficulties

Toren

Learning
I have had this so badly that I would just stop stumbling and be silent. My son actually teases me about it good naturedly. I will go completely blank on anything from what did you eat for lunch to "where do you work?" and i would stumble and intnerally flail frantically for the information. Sometimes I just stutter or mix two words together into one. It has diminished a bit in the last couple of weeks since my ex deployed (voluntarily) so I am hopeful it will improve as it is so freaking frustrating as I used to be pretty articulate. Glad you posted about this and to know I am not alone. I hope we both get to a place of security within ourselves where this doesn't need to happen. I think it is part dissociation at times because the info is just gone
 

Warrior Chicken

MyPTSD Pro
Yep....happens to me as well. Often I can manage it with pauses when it's words, and my brain might be able to replace a single word with a description of what I'm trying to explain when it's not completely fried or zapped by a trigger.

It was extremely frustrating last week when I was working on things in therapy. I'd be listening to what my T was explaining to me, trying to apply it to my history so I could understand it, then I would want to provide a comment and would open my mouth - T would pause for me to speak, and it would be gone. Like a breeze caught it and swept it away. It's entirely confusing in the moment, frustrating, and feels like your marbles just spilled. Then you have to pick them up and figure out which one was being worked on.
Thankfully, when it happens in a place where the other person understands it, there's no judgement.
As @tree mentioned - ptsd causes us not to be able to access our frontal lobes sometimes. That causes us to lose speech entirely, or words.
Knowing that doesn't change how frustrating it is when it happens and how much you'd like to either improve it or make sure it never happens.

I also agree with @Toren - when it happened to me in session it also felt as though my brain was blocking access to what I wanted to say. I used to completely zone out and be lost in dissociation but have improved a bit. The brain is so tricky though, could be that dissociation adapts as we progress.....not sure. Anyone care to comment on their own experience?

Thanks for posting this thread.
 

ruborcoraxxx

MyPTSD Pro
The brain is so tricky though, could be that dissociation adapts as we progress....
I think so. I might be a bit atypical in this, but there is a thing, I just press the button and that’s it, I flood the conversation in any nonsense direction, make jokes, tell a story for the hundred time, and I can watch myself doing it and I can’t manage to stop. Then at the end I’m reminded of what I wanted to do and I didn’t do it. If I have a gap, I manage to fill it with whatever. I can write without thinking at all. It’s very strange.

There have been moments people told me I did the very exact same series of responses and associations two times, the first one I didn’t remember. So I understand that this series of words were very automatic. Stress tends to make me rather talkative and hectic more than becoming silent, but it’s not really quality conversation. Depression, sheer fear or rage can make me shut down.
 
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