They Call Me Tator Salad

[Taylor30313]

Honestly I don't know. Am I coming or am I going? From the outside my life looks pretty normal. Well you see, it's not. I was diagnosed with PTSD a few years ago right out of high school. And I had a nervous breakdown of sorts. Tried to kill myself. Twice. Took alot of meds. Talked (listened honestly) to so many doctors talk. When suicide didn't work I figured, well shit, better try something else. Slowly but surely I got stronger, harder and held down a job and enrolled in a local college.

But, I'm still sick. I'm that same scared, angry at the universe child. I have no one to talk to and I really consider suicide to this day. Whether I actually want to or not I think about it a lot. I miss being transparent. In a f*cked up way I miss everyone knowing I'm sick, because at least then everybody saw my pain. I'm not saying I want any sympathy, I just want to be heard is all. To matter. To have no secrets.

 

[ladee]

Welcome! Glad you found us. You will be heard here, many people here who understand. Get comfortable and hope to see you around... sending gentle welcoming hugs if you accept.. no offense if you don't like hugs... just put them on a shelf and take one down and use it as needed...

 

[Changing4Best]

Hi, Are you in therapy? If not, I would suggest it strongly. It helps a lot. At first you may need to see your therapist a couple of times a week, but as time goes on, it could be as infrequently as once a month. That is how often I see mine, just to work on anything that might come up, or just to chat about the little annoying things that happen in daily life or something.

Also, try to eat right and take a multi-vitamin. This is very important as well. Potato chips are good once in awhile, and one dessert a day might be OK, but don't go overload on sugary stuff.

If you cannot afford a Therapist and your insurance does not cover it, do you think you could find out if there is some kind of counselor at college? There was one at the college I went to and I saw him for awhile. I did a lot of crying, which can sometimes be good for one. It is a release of bad emotions, which hopefully after that won't bite you any longer.

If you are new to the Forum, (I have not see you before) welcome!

 

[Taylor30313]

Welcome! Glad you found us. You will be heard here, many people here who understand. Get comfortable and...

Hugs are great thank you for your reply too! Really helped.

 

[Taylor30313]

Hi, Are you in therapy? If not, I would suggest it strongly. It helps a lot. At first you may need...

Thank you. I can't afford one right now, but hopefully soon. I will see though if my college does. That's great advise.