How To Make Your Self Unpopular

[Rani G2]

I believe that recognizing and respecting an individuals coping mechanisms is always a healthy basis to heal. Easily said than done because some Strategies are harmful not only for myself but for others too. Acknowledging them doesnt mean, “Oh yeah....thats the way you tackle relationships in life, keep on doing so“. People dont live in a social void, we have been and are still influenced in so many ways, that our coping meachnisms vary and is a very subjective experience. You cant take a human being out of his or her social context. Poverty matters, racism matters, LGBT rights matter. Okay, now what has that to do with PTSD? I dont know, I just need to say this.

 

[UnKnown-Self]

@Suzetig
Your post deserves more than a like, it's 5 stars! Very well said.

 

[Bloomy]

Thanks for hijacking my thread sucessfully anonymous.

Jepp - this is what happens in real life too. Someone comes along break into an ongoing conversation and rudely demand to be center of attention even do at the moment there might have been someone else that needed it.

So - shall we keep answering Anonymous?

f*ck it. Bloomy is by now pissed. Hope Anonymous got the attention he wanted in my thread about something that was none of his busniess to poke its anonymous nose in to begin with as long as you were to babbel all about your own concernes. . As @Ronin said over here you have now puked all over this thread that was important to me.

This is what usually happens - people comes peing on my life like this like its a f*ckin joke. f*ck Bloomy cause Im so much more important Ill interrupt her first and babbel along with my own shit and then call her rude and insencitive when she cant handle and get uspset.

 

[Bloomy]

Dont really want to follow this thread anymore.
Im tired.
Got dumped twice today.
Someone else had planed a hike at the same time and place as Bloomy and no one went with her.
Then she had another event going and every one cancelled.

Om done.

 

[Deleted member 541]

@Bloomy Take a deep breath and just breathe out slowly. Don't walk away from your thread just because someone posted an annoying post and hid behind the annon mask. I hate that thing!!! Everyone here is entitled to their opinion and even if we don't like it, it happens.

I wonder if you feel people don't like you, or don't want to be around you because your depressed? Are you depressed??? I know when I'm super depressed, no one likes to be around me I kind of drag others down and most people like to laugh and have a great time when they are with others. They don't like the killjoy of the part dragging others down.

Hang in there........

 

[Rani G2]

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[UnKnown-Self]

Dear Bloomy,
Please don't give up. If you want to go on a hike and no one else wants to go, don't let that stop you. Go on your hike, take a notebook and pause occasionally to write about the beauty of nature. Breathe in all that is around you. If you can, take pictures with your phone. Collect a leaf, acorn, pine cone or simply a stone that catches you eye.
Find things you enjoy that doesn't have to include others and do them.
I have found many with PTSD are very creative people. What creative things do you like? What have you tried?

The others are only important because you make them important. If they did include you in everything, how would you feel if they were doing to someone else what they are doing to you? Is that the kind of group you want to belong to?
If they pick the same place to hike, go to another place or take a different path. If you make plans, do it for yourself and don't invite others. Just do you.

 

[Bloomy]

Im just tired of being alone. Been since I was born. I need human company. One person in my hiking group had planned a hike today too and chosen the same time and same place as me to meet those that where to go on his hike. So every one ended going with him. Probably not a big deal just that Im vunerable to all sorts of rejections right now.
Then I had another event this evening and I asked those who said they join if they were still up. Nope they werent.

Ill go the the church instead as they are going to have a special event there for lonesome folks like me. Poetry and a mass.

 

[expectingbetter]

@Bloomy I am sorry for apparently continuing of hijacking your thread but I just felt like sharing my point of view concerning this as well.

I don't see the person who hides behind the anonymous mask as someone who really is hiding, it is just he or she always posting from that account, I see that way, it is the same hiding like I hide behind my mouse for example. And like we all here do.
I don't see also like that person wanted the attention that is getting actually, it was just expressing their opinion, and I am always sorry when somebody feels excluded here, I wish neither you Bloomy or the anonymous person would feel that way, but you both feel unfortunately.

I know I am grateful for this site and for this community and that this is the place where I feel so much supported like I don't feel anywhere in real life so I really have the amazing experience with how supportive this group is but I can understand that not all us here feel the same, unfortunately. Also it may be that it is not always the same, sometimes you could feel supported and then on the other days not at all.

@Bloomy in my opinion I mostly think that a lot of rejections I encounter in my life has nothing to do with me but rather with other people, so my opinion is that the reason why your event didn't attract people is just unconnected with anything concerning you.

But also I know I tend to give anybody a chance to come into my life and I run away from them only when I feel judged or attacked so it is just me, I can't tell you other than what I tend to do, and everybody is different anyway.

 

[UnKnown-Self]

It is very difficult being alone @Bloomy
Let me rephrase that, feeling lonely is very difficult, especially when that feeling of loneliness has been with you your whole life.
It can create a feeling of "what is wrong with me?"
That feeling can become a deep belief about yourself that can turn into a self truth.
If you believe something so deeply it becomes a personal truth, you will project that to others.

I am not criticizing but I think you and anonymous have something in common. A deep need to feel accepted.

Yes, this board reflects real life, we are real people dealing with our own real life issues. Not everyone is comfortable sharing what brought them here. Maybe some have a predetermined script so if they share something, certain responses are expected. If they don't get the response they want, they feel unliked or misunderstood and so they withdraw.

I have lived my life not fitting in, being avoided and excluded.
@Bloomy I give you kudos for trying, you are much braver than I am.
Not only don't I try to coordinate a get together, even when I am invited, I say an enthusiastic yes! Then at the last minute back out. Then my feelings are hurt when I'm no longer invited. Go figure!

All of this that's going on around you has nothing to do with anyone but yourself. You can't expect people to like you if you don't like yourself. I know because I live it.

Hugs of understanding offered. Accepted or not are both okay.

Alice

 

[Bloomy]

@expectingbetter - same here - I give up on people that attacks me or give me charateristic and judgment. I dont care if he is anonymous I care he intervine in something that is important to me in a thread I wrote and a puzzle about me I need to sort out to feel better.

I probably takes some matters personal and Im aware its due to growing up in family where they seemed to lothe me and mommy dearest always said I shouldnt have been born and then tried to kill me. But thats just me.

 

[Bloomy]

Okay so Im going to take a deep breathe and withdraw from this thread until Im not so tired and vunerable.

Sincerely appreaciat all replies - even anonymous.