I'm grateful for stumbling across this thread, too. Thank you for starting it,
@SeekingAfrica! :)It's a good reminder of an important way for us to take care of ourselves and heal, i.e., changing our outlook/relationship to what it means to have PTSD. From that flows all kinds of specific strategies, like writing things down in a planner, building in "recovery time," thinking critically about our own natural rhythms and being careful not to over-promise. AND to cut ourselves some slack because we're doing the best we can, and damn it, that's f*cking good enough. :mad:
I've had major depression (MDD) most of my life, since early childhood, and PTSD at least since age 15 (probably earlier, like age 5 or 11) -- so we're talking
decades now, folks. Both have come in waves or episodes, and both have, at times, subsided to barely perceptible levels.
After being on State Disability for a year and a total of 5-7 years to fully recover from my last MDD episode (besides the current one), I started to think about it as a chronic illness, like diabetes or multiple sclerosis. I have to actively manage my
illness to stay as
healthy as possible. And with that, therapy as needed, and the right medication combo, both the MDD and PTSD had been "in remission" for 12-15 years (until last year.) That's a good, long stretch to be virtually symptom-free!
I've been struggling with a resurgence of symptoms over the past year and it's affected my work.:( Since I started a new, intensive therapy (along with 2 weekly groups), I've had to talk about this a little bit with my boss. I didn't say what it was, I just said I have a chronic condition that's currently flared up, and I will have less flexibility with my schedule. I no longer come in to work on Fridays, and I don't even try to work from home that day. That day I do 90-minutes of intensive, trauma-focused therapy followed an hour later by a 90-minute "Yoga for Depression & Anxiety" class. I'm pretty much a wreck for the rest of the day, and sometimes for the weekend! I don't even schedule a phone call or look at emails. I make up the work hours at other times (it helps to be the Director of my department with a small but mighty staff, an exempt employee instead of hourly, AND have a super supportive boss who's struggled with depression for 20+ years himself!)
Now, I also have ADHD, which was only diagnosed about 12 years ago (but which I've also had since early childhood.) That's
never in remission and always takes active management strategies for getting shit done and not beating myself up for the myriad things left undone.
For me, ADHD has much in common with PTSD: Can't remember where you put your keys? Find yourself losing time staring out the window when you should be working? Don't want to have anyone over to your place because there's paper and "stuff" everywhere (not to mention being an introvert who simply can't "people" after a certain point)? Feel like you can't ask anyone for help until you've already done most of it by yourself? Feel like a failure if you can't pull it all off? :banghead:Overwhelmed by everything you have to do? Feel foggy and disorganized yet jumpy and anxious all the time? Feel ashamed??? Sound familiar????
Getting the ADHD dx was a huge benefit and game changer for me, because it made me take responsibility for figuring out how to live my life productively. One of the best and most practical books I've ever read is "ADD-Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life," by Dr. Kathleen Nadeau. :tup: It's co-authored by a professional organizer and they talk about organizing time, money, paper and "stuff," AND not getting overwhelmed with it all. They really give you permission to do things differently, to not feel like if you absolutely can't manage a filing cabinet and instead have messy piles all around you BUT you know where everything is, that is a perfectly legit way to go. It's an easy read, and might help if your PTSD is making you feel overwhelmed with all the things you have to manage. I've recommended it to loads of people without ADHD who for one reason or another are disorganized and overwhelmed and all the procrastination, time management, and organization self-help books don't do f*ck-all for them.
Great thread, thanks for all the self-care reminders, everyone!
