Sexual Assault Tired Of Pretending

[missfrier]

tired of telling every one I'm ok feeling lke this I had good few days and Iit starred going down I wasup most of ngiht nightmares flash backs my head pounding I'm tired took it all out on ash this morning so now I feel guilty the front door was left unlocked normally I do it every night went to go to school couldn't find my keys car was frozen I wen flying spilt coffee was trying sort Bradley out tidy kitchen gget my self ready for school my I just want to shut my self away I want it to stop and go away I don't want tot keep doing these feeligns any more why wont they stop

 

[Bristol]

I feel exactly the same as you it's hard to act normal and carry on, keep going though we are all behind you

 

[missfrier]

thank you for reply

 

[Deleted member 37085]

@missfrier I also feel a lot like you do; going through the motions. I can't believe I feel the way I do, and I do feel as you @missfrier. That which does not kill me will (is) making me stronger. I didn't come this far to give up. I will (for this moment in time) NEVER give up. MInd tells me S/I and that's a permanent solution to a temporary problem - so I've been told. Plus, I don't want to leave here, I just, like you - want the flippin' pain, nightmares, etc. to end. Am in emdr therapy, it sucks, because it hurts like hell, like hell. I'm not giving up (one moment at a time) one minute at a time, and you @missfrier are backed by thousands of members here who do give a darn about you. Yes, I care about you, and know you are hurting, me too. Others here as well. We are a community that speak the same (ptsd) language and I (you) no longer have to go through this crap alone, anymore. (If you accept), big hug for @missfrier. JadesJewel

 

[missfrier]

Thank you sorry

 

[Deleted member 37085]

Oh, Oh, Oh @missfrier I am sorry! Let me get off my soapbox. I care about you a...

Thank you sorry

Oh, Oh, Oh @missfrier I am sorry! Let me get off my soapbox. I care about you and what you are going through; I identify with a lot of what you are dealing with at present and you are not alone. I apologize for sounding like I've got ptsd under control. For I do not; I get so upset that I have it and I want you to know @missfrier that we are going through this together. I am here for you, anytime you want to talk ANYTIME, you just pm me or write on my profile page. I so do apologize for I was so strong in my response back to you. I just want you to know that I too am struggling and at times taking life one second, one minute, one day at a time. You are so brave for coming on and posting and you have helped me by doing so. You have reminded me that I am not alone with ptsd. You are here and I am not alone.

You have nothing to apologize to me for @missfrier. I wanted to build you up, instead I must have made you feel badly. I never ever want to make you feel that way. I care and I am here for you @missfrier. JJ

 

[missfrier]

Thank,you I thought I had,upset you, see,my councillor next week think it could,be last one.as waiting for specialist coubcilibg tower if they can.help me

 

[Deleted member 37085]

Thank,you I thought I had,upset you, see,my councillor next week think it could,be last one.as waitin...

No! Never! You did NOT upset me @missfrier. Oh, precious one. No. I care so much about you. Please know that I am here anytime you need to talk. I am here. I have prolonged complex ptsd, and I am in fight for my life. I won't give up. I am so very grateful @missfrier that you posted your thoughts, feelings, and where you are at in your life right now. I am so grateful for your post. Thank you. PM me anytime, and/or write on my profile page anytime. JJ

 

[missfrier]

Thank you I kkeep alto,of my feelings,bottled,up, shut my self away and if it wasn't for,my son don't no where,I be,

 

[Deleted member 37085]

Thank you I kkeep alto,of my feelings,bottled,up, shut my self away and if it wasn't for,my son don't...

@missfrier You don't have to keep your feelings bottled up now that you are a member here. You do not have to shut yourself away anymore. You have thousands of members here (me included) that care about you and you never have to shut yourself off from your feelings, your thoughts, your pain - ever again. I am sorry that you did not sleep well last evening, neither did I hon.

Also, please try not to be hard on yourself regarding your son. You will learn so much here in this forum through so many members here. Please post anytime you need to and members (like me) will share so lovingly and willingly their experiences, strengths, weaknesses, hopes, failures, and everything that is ptsd - with you @missfrier. JJ

 

[missfrier]

Thank you

 

[Deleted member 37085]

Thank you

(((HUGS)))