5 Things I'm Thinking Today

[Muttly]

1) still having lots of fibro issues and have a major headache
2) headache turning into stress headache. blah
3) found a lump on my cat. probably nothing but not handling it well, because I was already stressed. all the indications (that i can check, say it's not cancer) but... bleh. so, I'll give it a week to make sure it's not an injury since he was outside friday. he's only 7. sigh, and don't really have money for a vet bill and if it doesn't heal in the next week that almost definitely means a biopsy which is expensive.
4) need to pull my shit together and go to work
5) ok, all that whiny stuff, but the wonderful, fantastic news is, yesterday we said we love each other. we were both protecting each other by not saying it sooner. I was pretty much sure he felt the same way but to have it confirmed and be able to share feelings.... and we, have never felt this way. never let anyone get so close. never thought we could feel this way. thought that part of ourself was too broken. heh. And it was cute, because he said all his insiders (he also has DID) talked and agreed they loved us. And we said we all had talked and agreed. All that makes 1 through 4 much more manageable. I really believed I could never feel this kind of love. huh.

 

[Friday]

The Hippa law should have exceptions for family members searching for loved ones.

They're actually written -in part- to prevent exactly that.

What you can do, however? Is

0 Time - Lots of Money
- Hire someone who is legally & ethically bound not to disclose anything protected by medical confidentiality laws to search for them. (Private investigator, licensed at the highest level your state requires, lower level licensees don't have the same access. Check with your local PD & DA as that's where most good PIs come from or work out of.) You still won't know where your family member is (if it's protected information, like a mental health facility or drug/alcohol rehab) but you'll know they are indeed somewhere being looked after, and your contact information can be left there (by way of the 3rd party) so if the patient decides to contact you? &/or disclose where they are, or sign the paperwork needed to put you on their visitors &/or exchange of information list? They can. Conversely, if they're not in a medical facility? You'll usually get their exact contact information. Even if it's "just" the food bank they frequent on Tuesdays.

Little time - Little money
- Write a letter to you family member and mass mail it out to every facility you think they might be at. Getting a returned letter breaks HIPPA confidentiality laws (you're not allowed to disclose whether a person is or is not there, and returned mail indicates that they're not there), so unless they've got a new receptionist you won't hear back from any of them. But if they are there? Your letter will be delivered to them. INCLUDING if they were there, are not any longer, but have left a forwarding address. (Patients often receive mail for several months after discharge). At which point they can decide to break confidentiality, or not. I would be very very certain to include that you are mailing this out to 124 (or however many hospitals, rehabs, etc.) locations inside the letter itself, so the shock of being "found" by someone you're deliberately hiding from / the idea that your confidentiality has been broken / massive loss of trust / etc. doesn't cause them a major setback OR cause them to flee the program itself.

Lots of time - 0 money
- Be prepared to listen to 124 (or however many) "I'm sorry, but I'm not finding your name on our list & we're not allowed to confirm or deny whether or not someone is a patient here, without a letter of consent specifically naming you." <<< When you cold call facilities? Do NOT ask for your family member by name. Give your own name, and ask if you're on their exchange of info list. The receptionist may then ask for the name of your family member (usually not) if they have approved contacts on cards, rather than a data base. Ideally? Give them both your legal name AND any nicknames you might be known by. Mr. Lion Heart, or possibly Leo Heart or Uncle Leo... As patients in distress are pretty notorious for not filling out paperwork with full legal names, and unless they're also trying to get into contact with you? That's not a very high priority for therapeutic staff, and admin staff doesn't have access. So what happens is "Uncle Leo" gets written into the database. Then when someone calls with the name Uncle Leo? They're asked to leave their number & full name (because it doesn't meet legal standards to disclose to a partial name), so that they can verify whether or not they have a release on you. Then that request goes back to the therapeutic staff, who confirm with the patient, who then get back to the admin staff. Whole process can take a couple days... So don't just wait by the phone. AND don't get your hopes up. Some facilities take contact information from every caller, just so that they're not in breach of HIPPA by asking for it (indicating that someone is there).

Good Luck :)

 

[Teasel]

Really happy for your good news item no 5 @Muttly that's lovely :-)

1 ~ I feel better than I did
2 ~ Bed time
3 ~ Salad for lunch tm
4 ~ it's been playing on my mind how I stood up to s/o and rather than back down I think I'll continue to let it play on my mind as long as I need to
5 ~ sausages

 

[Heather]

Life is hard again

We are miserable... Again or maybe still.. ...who knows

It was beautiful today and we sat outside

My mother still doesn't get it...frustrating

I want to get out of here and goto Florida

 

[Muttly]

1) found a lump on one kitty. checked it out and it's probably a wound or fatty lump, not cancer, but of course I don't really know. came home from work and it looks like the other kitty has a hot spot? wtf? did the two of them get in a fight and they are both having bad results? is it the flea medicine? that could make sense for the hot spot but no so much the lump and the hot spot isn't really where the flea medicine was. is it some major bad kitty karma?

2) hit a possum on the way home. i swerved way around him and he was almost across the road but then he turned around head for my car. I swerved wider and then he sped up and ran right in front. there'd been a car tailgating so I hadn't wanted to slam on the breaks at first and then i was swerving so much that I didn't want to break harder than I was and skid the car. bah. poor stupid possum

3) my dog bit my hand while playing tug-of-war. no broken skin but some mighty good bruising. this happened shortly after finding the hot spot on the cat, which happened shortly after hitting the poor possum. meh!!!!

4) I really can't afford two vet bills. One I can pull out of emergency fund, but two? ok. stop stressing. can't fix it tonight

5) I want to come up with something positive... hmm... umm... I like stephen colbert

 

[Friday]

5) I want to come up with something positive... hmm... umm... I like stephen colbert

<grin> That's TWO things! :D Wanting to come up with something positive is positive, and then finding one? Double points.

 

[Lionheart]

Thank you so much @Friday for the information!!! I have been quite stressed over my brothers whereabouts!!!

If he is in mental hospital that would be a good thing, but if he is out on his own it might be disastrous, so like a big brother, I worry, I search, and I pray.

Will update when I get more info to share...

thanks again,
Lion

 

[The Albatross]

1. My face hurts. (Allergies seem to flare up when it's windy here)
2. A peer is AWOL again. No more voice mails, just send an email today. She doesn't get her voice mails half the time anyways.
3. A deadline and hope to get resolution... why didn't that friggin' bill come in the mail?
4. My right shoulder and arm to the palm is still doing the pins & needles thing... over 3 months now. I don't even have to be using it now and it happens quite a lot throughout the day and evening. Cyst? Peripheral neuropathy? Pinched nerve? What the heck? No job so still not gonna do anything about it. (Brain says, "Stop being a whiny bitch you know you hate that".)
5. Confirm the class... what will they think of me?

 

[Ronin]

1. Bills paid & food bought.
2. Rites for the lost ones. Some closure where there's no other one.
3. Japan. Dreams. Closer Than. Plans. Somewhere else entirely. Mission still.
4. At least I finally remembered who used to wear that other ring / why did I keep it.
5. Breathe. Aim. Live. Breathe & Aim to live. The path matters, loss is collateral.

 

[Teasel]

1 ~ I like dancing.
2 ~ I want to do more dancing.
3 ~ And painting
4 ~ Why am I so frigging afraid of something I live so much?
5 ~ Aaaaaarrrgggghhhh stoopid.

 

[Teasel]

Love not live

 

[Tornadic Thoughts]

So many humans, so little humanity.

The rain from Spain (and everywhere else in between) brings lots of pain.

Pain leads to some major brain and energy drain.

Damn, those nasturtiums grow like a mofo!

I'm more like the peppers, though, I tend to grow slow and low.