Hello all,
This post I'm sure is going to sound crazy but I need to tell my story and ask for help. I am married to a wonderful man, Combat Vet with PTSD. This is a second marriage and he took on ALOT. I was in a 19 year marriage with a sociopath!! I have 3 adult children none of which live at home. Back 6-8 mos ago I had a box with things of my son's to send out to him. Things that I had packed up from my old house. Well there were things from his father that he wanted to keep. His father had committed suicide several years ago and my son was holding onto items that he wanted. So I did the wrong thing not even realizing I never should have taken that box into OUR home. My husband found the box and really had a very had time with items in his house that were from such a VERY bad man. He blamed me which I understand but have to say it wasn't anything I did on purpose. I took the box and threw it away. My son was holding onto things he really didn't even care about. It was my fault I hadn't mailed it out to him. That being said my husband had a VERY hard time with the situation. He was withdrawn and it made him physically sick....he would wake up in the night vomiting for about a week. I didn't know if my marriage would make it through this but it did. I understood why he was upset but the physical aspect was something I had never experienced before.
Well, just the other day we were out at the fire and I noticed my husband using a walking stick to toss the fire around. When I asked where it came from he said my son. I think my son got it from his fathers apt when it was cleaned out. I was in shock and sick to my stomach. He said my son didn't want it so they were using it for the fire. It was with the other stuff I threw out but I never saw it as it was outside. SO what do I do..... I want to get rid of it!!!!!! I'm so afraid to explain to my husband why I got rid of it!!!! He's going to have a fit that again something from my BAD ex was in his home!!! I hate not feeling comfortable with talking to him about this!! I'm afraid he'll go back into a funk like he was in. Its gross I understand but its innocent....Help any suggestions?
This post I'm sure is going to sound crazy but I need to tell my story and ask for help. I am married to a wonderful man, Combat Vet with PTSD. This is a second marriage and he took on ALOT. I was in a 19 year marriage with a sociopath!! I have 3 adult children none of which live at home. Back 6-8 mos ago I had a box with things of my son's to send out to him. Things that I had packed up from my old house. Well there were things from his father that he wanted to keep. His father had committed suicide several years ago and my son was holding onto items that he wanted. So I did the wrong thing not even realizing I never should have taken that box into OUR home. My husband found the box and really had a very had time with items in his house that were from such a VERY bad man. He blamed me which I understand but have to say it wasn't anything I did on purpose. I took the box and threw it away. My son was holding onto things he really didn't even care about. It was my fault I hadn't mailed it out to him. That being said my husband had a VERY hard time with the situation. He was withdrawn and it made him physically sick....he would wake up in the night vomiting for about a week. I didn't know if my marriage would make it through this but it did. I understood why he was upset but the physical aspect was something I had never experienced before.
Well, just the other day we were out at the fire and I noticed my husband using a walking stick to toss the fire around. When I asked where it came from he said my son. I think my son got it from his fathers apt when it was cleaned out. I was in shock and sick to my stomach. He said my son didn't want it so they were using it for the fire. It was with the other stuff I threw out but I never saw it as it was outside. SO what do I do..... I want to get rid of it!!!!!! I'm so afraid to explain to my husband why I got rid of it!!!! He's going to have a fit that again something from my BAD ex was in his home!!! I hate not feeling comfortable with talking to him about this!! I'm afraid he'll go back into a funk like he was in. Its gross I understand but its innocent....Help any suggestions?