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When Meds Shut You Down

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Grizzly

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do you ever go throu a stage where is seems like the meds aren't doing their job?

I'm having a great day it seems. In control. However, I have been having these near panic attacks all afternoon.

Closer to this evening I'm hit with this darkness. Unsettling unhappiness. Hatred of all things but mostly myself.

It's not suicidal ideation. But best as explained its more like no interest in my future I guess. I don't get it. At the moment it all sucks.
 
Well sorry to say yes....at times......What I think it is (total guess on my part) the Beast wants out big time. So it hits you/us with everything all at once, starts out slowly and gets bigger. I'm thinking when as you said "I'm having a great day it seems."
Here is when the beast thinks it would be a good time to come at you....I am now at a point in dealing with this f*cker, I just tell the mother, Nice Try, but I am not going to let you pull your shit, I will not play your game. So I go into lets say mode 1, I know what it is, how long it may last and it wants me to feel like shit. So I may take an extra Xanax, have a green tea, do something I like and ride it out.....I may have to try a few things, but I will not let it get to me.....Easier said than done, but after doing it, over and over, I have no idea how many times, it works......It will start to fade.......Think of it this way, I have to get a shot in the ass once a week and have been for 5 years, got one today. I have got to a point I don't even think about the damn thing.......I wounder how I would feel if I sat around and thought about getting that shot for the week before???

My point being, we have the Beast. We know what it can do with our bodies and mind and make us feel like shit....It's not going a way, so we need to expect whats coming. If not today, maybe the next or the next, it will come. Each of us just need to learn to be ready for that day and have a plan worked out to deal with it.....It can be done........

Truth be told, I was once afraid of the dark when I was a kid......Makes me laugh......Now the dark is my friend and yes some people should be afraid of the dark, very afraid if I am in it.....;) Now the beast likes that shit, as we are in agreement...

J R
 
I don't have a lotta experience with most Rx's... But I've got a helluva lot of exp with ADHD meds. One thing, is that if you notice a pattern like that? It's usually either a side effect, or you've just found the half-life / this is what happens when it starts wearing off. If it's a side effect, it usually means it's the wrong med. time to try something else. If it's the half life? What happens when the levels drop in your bloodstream? The fix for that with short acting meds is to time a second dose so that you don't have that rebound.

Talk with your doc, Grizz. Most meds either have well known side effects or halflives, so they'll know which it's likely to be. And whether to switch you up or add another dose.

Now... If this is a long acting (takes a month to build up in your system, so levels are constant as long as you don't forget a dose) I'm talking out my ass. ADHD meds are short acting / that's where my experience lies. Still means it's time to chat up your doc, though.
 
Grizzly, frequently. It's taken docs quite a while to figure what medication would work with me, I tended to have far more side effects than otherwise issues with health and self medicated even worse, so quite fun. Upping the dosage of what worked usually got me to much better place, but then that's something they're competent to judge.
Just chiming in with 'yes, been there, it's got solutions'.
 
do you ever go throu a stage where is seems like the meds aren't doing their job?

I'm having a great day it seems. In control. However, I have been having these near panic attacks all afternoon.

Closer to this evening I'm hit with this darkness. Unsettling unhappiness. Hatred of all things but mostly myself.

It's not suicidal ideation. But best as explained its more like no interest in my future I guess. I don't get it. At the moment it all sucks.

It happens often. Most folks are not lucid enough to even notice it- even the so called normal folks.
I could go off on a long, detailed biochemical tirade about what causes this, but it is just easier to say it happens to everyone.

In my experience it is one of the ironies of the beast.

That shit they call heightened vigilance and we call situational awareness/attention to detail? It just makes us Combat PTSDers more likely to notice when we perceive shit ain't right, even if it is ourselves.

I think in the case you describe it is a result of the meds working too well! You are chilled out and aware enough that you have become more sensitive to your own mind.

Does that make sense or sound like a bunch of touchy-feely New Age horseshit?
 
Some days medicine just dont overpower the mind and the thoughts that come at least it's that way for me. I do no it sure helps if everything else in your life is going good. Stress, Bills, and the beast dont play good together
 
Thanks everyone. My biggest issue lately is general work related stress.

Both T's have said I need deeper help and I need to take an absence. Mathis all plays into my whole "I beat myself up over everything". Part of My brain tells me I need to HTFU while my body and other parts are on fire.

Just another shitty day today. And it's all stress.

My kick in the nuts...I felt like I used to work well under stress. Seems age is a mutherf*cker. Can't hardly wait till I'm 50!

Wah...wah...wah!
 
I know I'm a bit late in jumping in on this topic but today is one of those days for me. Everybody is winding things down since it is the holiday season but my supervisor still expects me to get stuff done when I'm waiting on other people to do their job so I can finish up what she wants me to get done but even when I tell her she keeps asking me how the different stuff is doing. I woke up hoping it would be an alright day but as I got dressed and came into work I could just feel that it was going to be a rough day and felt like the meds weren't working today to an extent. I just want to put my coat on and say f*ck it and leave work and go for a long walk. But I can't just tell my work that I'm not having a good day and leave without going to mental health and mental health won't let me just walk in unless I'm having thoughts of harming/killing myself or others.
 
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