Sufferer Just me. overwhelmed & over triggered stage with new therapist.

[Harmonics]

Just saying hi. I am new here. I have been quietly reading, trying to reassure myself that I am not alone in these feelings. I am currently in the overwhelmed and over triggered stage with a new therapist.

 

[ladee]

Welcome !!! Glad you found us. and happy to hear you looked around for awhile to see if this was a good fit for you.... I'm sorry for what brought you here, but you are among people who support and understand. You are not alone..... glad you are here.

 

[EveHarrington]

Is the therapist pushing you too hard?

Are you seeing a trauma therapist?

 

[Deleted member 37085]

Welcome! @Harmonics

 

[Harmonics]

Is the therapist pushing you too hard?

Are you seeing a trauma therapist?

I don't feel like T is pushing too hard. I am able to set the pace. Yes on the trauma T. It is just that even quickly going over the history is very difficult. I am having to focus very carefully on good self-care.

 

[Deleted member 43031]

Hi Harmonics, I am right where you are still seeking a new therapist. Just saw another one first time on Saturday. Still not sure. It is scary for me. Glad you found one you feel is allowing you to set the pace. I too am feeling overwhelmed, that alone is a trigger. Slow it down. Get to know your therapist. Ask any questions you want or need to do. Let yourself get comfortable and feel safe, that takes time. It's hard because we need it so badly, and yet it is a process, we have to be kind and patient with ourselves. I need to feel a comfortable "connect" with a new therapist, plus know their boundaries and availabilities between sessions as well.

I found a great therapist on-line who writes a blog and articles on Psychology Today on-line, coaching and encouraging clients to interview new therapists, relevant questions to ask - he is wonderful - his name is Ryan Howes, PH.D, ABPP....he does have a home page, website - but I cannot put it into this comment section. If you find it - Scroll down and he has a section - really helpful for me called 21 Tips for Clients in Psychotherapy
best to you, and you helped me feel not so alone.

Hi Harmonics, I am right where you are still seeking a new therapist. Just saw another one fir...

PS. I am not seeing this guy, but had the opportunity to speak to him, and read quite a few of his blogs and articles. It helps, but still is challenging to be troubled and still have the presence of mind to discern if a therapist is right for you. xoxo

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[Joan]

Welcome to the forum.

 

[The Albatross]

Welcome Frankly to the forum.

 

[Deleted member 43031]

To be Frank, I am mighty appreciative. Thank you.

 

[Harmonics]

Just saying hi. I am new here. I have been quietly reading, trying to reassure myself that I am not...

I had to come back to this thread. What a difference a little over a year makes! At first, I felt really stupid looking for another T after 18+ years with a previous T. But I had graduated college, moved to another state, and was living in limbo. I needed the support. Plus, with the move, I was now away from my family...where a lot of the childhood abuse came from.

A friend of mine who is a T advised me to find a new T. The previous T had made a point of telling me before I moved that I did not need therapy. Yikes! I now realize that was a questionable thing to say. In any case, the previous T was NOT a trauma therapist and had absolutely no idea how to handle having someone with CPTSD. They had retraumatized me in the way they handled what little finally came out about my past. I really couldn't have done trauma therapy then anyway because I was living next to family who were childhood abusers.

The flashbacks started in earnest shortly after the move, making me realize that no matter what, I needed help. I got lucky in finding a good T who also does trauma therapy. I did not realize when I walked in the door that would be what we would need to work on. I thought I just needed to find a way to continue "letting go" (stuffing) of my past (more "great" advice from previous T). During the history with the new T, I was asked about a family member who did most of the abuse...and I freaked out--crying, hands in front of me trying to protect myself--and I began to realize I had to somehow go back and address my past. Thankfully, T got a pretty good idea that it was bad and asked no more questions.

I spent the next six months working on coping skills. Then one day, in the process of trying to work on skills to get through an upcoming family get-together, he said something about taking a time-out to look at my hands if I got overwhelmed. I responded telling him that I had learned how to get "lost" in the ceiling as a kid. That's when we started talking about the dissociation. The previous T did not believe in dissociation and made fun of me when shifts took place. But I still did it and couldn't help it. I had since I was a kid. I did not know that was what I was doing or that it even had a name until I returned to college and took a class that briefly covered it. So it was a big shock when this T said dissociation, and I was allowed to talk about it without being ridiculed.

Fast-forward another few months, and one day I just started talking a little about what happened as a kid. It was the first time I ever had someone validate that what I went through was traumatic and illegal. I have a long way to go, but I can see that I have made a lot of progress since my first posting. I am still in my job, and I love it. I also have a part-time job doing another thing that I love. I am getting ready to buy a house. I am in grad school now and doing well with my classes. I have put a lot of boundaries in place with my family, and I am learning that it is ok to enforce them. I am learning to feel, something that is very hard. I spent my whole life running from feelings. I have a long way to go, but life is just one long journey. I will keep taking one step at a time.

 

[Joan]

Well done! So glad you sought out help and found a good T. Sounds like you have done some really hard work. Congrats!

 

[Justmehere]

Wow, it is so great to read of all the good solid progress!

Seeing a trauma therapist really does make a big difference over a general therapist. So much. Good on you for facing so many changes head on. I’m learning to live with feelings (ack!) now too.

Keep up the good work!