Bad day/meds not helping

[AnonymousGirl99]

Hi everyone,

I was curious if anyone else had days like these. A bit of info: I have CPSTD, emetophia, and PMDD. I'm currently PMDDing, so it's intense, but the past three days:

Multiple panic attacks Friday. What it took to calm me down: 1 Zofran, 2 Tylenol,.75mg Xanax, 37mgs Hydroxyzine, .125mgs of Klonopin.

Panic attacks Saturday: .75 mgs Xanax, 50mgs Hydroxyzine

Multiple panic attacks Sunday: 1 mg Xanax, 1 mg Klonopin, 1 Zofran, 2 Tylenol, so far only 12 mgs of Hydroxyzine, debating taking 50 more mgs.

To me, this is a lot of medication. I've been in contact with my psychiatrist and therapist. I'm not doing this alone, but the bad thing is, I'm STILL in this cycle and not entirely calm. I feel like I'm beyond help.

Has anyone ever been in a cycle like this before? Is this not as many drugs as I feel like it is? How do you break the cycle? I'm going to pick up some Seroquel tomorrow, but I'm not sure how much longer I can live like this.

Any help is appreciated.
Ella

 

[Supervixn]

You can't rely solely on medications to take it all away... imo...

Are you doing any mindfulness or CBT type things to combat some of this?

 

[ParalyzedMind]

Hi everyone,

I was curious if anyone else had days like these. A bit of info: I have CPSTD, emetophi...

Hi there.
Up until last week, I used to be taking care of PTSD victims, as part of my job. I am a physician, but the trauma 6 months ago have now come so strongly into my head that I can hardly think about anything else. PLEASE DO NOT TAKE ANYTHING I SAY AS MEDICAL ADVICE, but rather as a patient to a patient at this time. I do not any more feel like I can be a healer again and it is devastating to me, but I have to be truthful, so Please respect that NONE of this is medical advice.

I do EMDR with my psychiatrist and has just been prescribed Guanfacine, which actually is a blood pressure medication, also used for ADD and studied for PTSD. Only other medication I am on is 5 mg of Lexapro, but this is something I am trying to get off as well. Personally, I don't want a future on medications.

I will speak about how I am dealing with hit now and why. First of all, I find EMDR the biggest help I have and dread medications. That is just me and it may not work for everybody. I have taken one BZ in my life and never liked how I felt. Of the meds you list, I would say Hydroxyzine is the one with least long-term concern, but it also may not be effective enough for others. Otherwise, if you know ONE person you can trust and feel comfortable with, then that may be a good start. My wife is also a physician, but she doesn't understand me, but is trying her best to help me, dear her.

So my simple advice would be to talk to your physician at extent and raise your concerns. Do you do any EMDR? Find a good therapist. I am lucky enough that my psychiatrist is also a psychotherapist and EMDR trained. He is excellent and I think he has saved my life, although I cannot seem to move beyond total dread at this point. Otherwise, I am trying to find something that makes me have some enjoyment, ANYTHING, because I know how important it is for the brain to feel some positive vibes.

For all it is worth, here is what I am trying to do for myself:

*Music therapy: I listen to ambient electronic beats and there are many designed to lessen anxiety. Take a look at Marconi Union and "Weightless", find your preferred volume and just let it sink in. At least to me, it helps. The frequency of the beats is set at 60, which is supposed to be a good rate for calm. Look it up on YouTube.


*Games: I try to play chess online and also play some video games of past I have liked, that I connote with better times.

*Hiking: I have a past of rock climbing, skydiving and other sports. At the moment, I cannot rock climb as I don't have the focus, but I hope to return to skydiving soon. Being in a plane with all noise and high up in sky doesn't bother me at all. At some point I will go back to that. Nowadays, I do a lot of solitary hiking in parks and I go on easy climbs, where I don't need any gear and just sit high up and watch the earth, which makes me happy. Just looking at trees and identifying different bark thickness is something I used to do as kid to learn where north is and now it is coming back again and is a good feeling.

*Drives: As long as you are comfortable with it, may not fit everyone, I go for small drives just to feel like I am able to master that. I stay off highways and go to rural road with little traffic. I also find this helpful to test how I can go to new areas and be good.

-------------------------------------------------------

Finally, I reiterate that speak to your physician about your concerns with medications. Everybody is different and everybody has different thoughts about drugs and therapy. You need a good conversation here. All the best and I hope to get help from you all and maybe throw in my 10 cents as a fellow patient as well.



*Prayer: Works for me, but I do not go to church (too many people and too much noise).

 

[Friday]

- Standard Caveat - I am not a doctor or pharmacist. This is purely my own experience. Any time you are concerned about how much or how often you're taking your meds? ALWAYS talk with your doctor or pharmacist for an informed & professional medical opinion.

Zofran is an antinausea
Tylenol is an analgesic
Hydroxyzine is an antihistamine

So I'd strike those off my mental list of things I'm taking.

Which leaves you with the Xanax & Klonopin.
- Klonopin is usually targeted at 1-1.5mg per day
- Xanax is usually targeted at 1-4mg per day.

So broken down, for 3 days you have taken the recommended dose -or less- for 2 meds, while having a very hard time.

Feels like a lot, but isn't.

***

I feel ya, by the by. I have a PRN med that if I actually take the recommended / prescribed dose for an acute issue I'd be out in 3 days what usually takes me a month to use. When you're used to not needing something, all of a sudden taking a PRN as prescribed can be a but of an :eek: OMFG! Aieeeee! :eek: kind of affair.

As far as daily panic attacks, and having panic attacks THROUGH your medication? Yup. So been there. For a very long time. To the point I had to stop taking my medication, because I wouldn't just be taking it one off, or for a few days in a row during a rough patch, to stop a bad cycle before it kicked off, or turn one around. And to the point where even when I did take them I was expecting them not to actually stop the symptoms, just enough to take the edge off for a little bit, in order to allow me to ramp up my other coping mechanisms to handle my symptoms.

 

[AnonymousGirl99]

Tried to post a response earlier, but I must've done something wrong. Anyway, thank you all so much for such thoughtful responses. Your kindness truly brings me to tears. Friday, the validation you gave was on point! It was exactly what I needed to hear, and it always means something more when it's coming from a fellow survivor. Thank you!

And Paralyzed Mind, thank you too for all of your suggestions! I tried the music you mentioned last night and it really eased me into sleep. I think it's something I will continue, especially as I lay groundwork for meditation. Will maybe help to focus my mind at first, since I have such trouble doing that which is why I avoid meditation in the first place.

I do exercise, but recently got Achilles tendonitis which just put me out. I can't run, and that breaks my heart, and is contributing to all of this I'm sure. I also started CBT quite recently, though I know that takes a while to work. I'm not very good at being patient when I feel like I'm losing my mind. But I'll keep trying. And I have yet to find a good EMDR therapist, but I may try looking again soon.

Anyway, thank you for all of your help! I'm still in the thick of it (though today seems to be better than yesterday so far). You all really just gave me the support I needed. <3

Ella

 

[ParalyzedMind]

Exercise:

If you can do yoga, I think it is good, but it has to be the right type.

Group yoga in a fitness center is NOT the right type.

If you can find a great traditional studio of Mysore style, which is individualized, without music or group-led, it is the best.

Personally, I find being in nature the most effective so far.

Finally, if anyone is gonna watch eclipse DO NOT LOOK DIRECTLY AT IT!!!

 

[EveHarrington]

Could it be possible you're stuck in a rebound/withdrawal situation which spikes anxiety between doses?

 

[ParalyzedMind]

Hmmm, this is STILL not medical advice, but if you are taking a medication at regular schedule, there is a "steady state" when plasma concentration has reached therapeutic effect and it will stay like that as long as dosage is regular.

THIS is different from "PRN" medications that are used to deal with something at the moment.

Very often, the PRN medications are more needed due to long-acting ones not being used, or being the wrong ones.

Examples:

*Using Xanax (Alprazolam) for anxiety attack vs. being on a steady schedule of Buspar (buspirone) to lower the generalized anxiety tone.

*Taking Imitrex (Sumatriptan) for migraine attacks vs. being on Topamax (Topiramate) to lower frequency of attacks.

*using long-acting insulin like Lantus (Glargine) to keep blood sugar closer to 120 range vs. using rapid-acting insulin like Lispro at meals to lower blood glucose after food intake.

Still, your question is very well a possibility with scheduled medications, especially with low or infrequent dosing.

Every response is variable and individual, so don't take my general comment as advice, but merely descriptive for the question

 

[AnonymousGirl99]

Eve - very good question and I've wondered this myself. My psych doesn't seem too concerned, though I might start keeping a closer eye. It's frustrating because it doesn't always seem to follow a pattern. Maybe I'm just not noticing it.

Paralyzed Mind - also an excellent point. Unfortunately, I'm relying mainly on PRNs at the moment. For the past three years I have tried (what feels like) everything under the sun. Mainly anti-depressants, but a few mood stabilizers and antipsychotics as well. I did not react well to any of them. Finally, at the start of this year, I decided to come off of the meds.

Before I went on them (including PRNs) three years ago, I never needed or had a prescription for anything and while I wasn't great, I was still functioning. Since starting them, I've had to take two leaves of absence from work and am still running out of sick days each fiscal year. My panic attacks are more intense and last longer, unlike anything I've experienced before. And that put me in the "fear of the fear" cycle, which now I'm finding hard to break since my last episode Sunday.

But I saw my psych yesterday and we have decided (or she finally realized) that these episodes are PMDD and that I should try going off my birth control pill, as I started this around the same time I started all the other drugs. I'm very hopeful this will make a difference. Time will tell.

She also said I likely have gastritis as a result of the stress, which triggers my emetophobia, which triggers panic. So I'm to take two tums a day like vitamins, and hopefully that will decrease the nausea and then decrease my anxiety as well.

I wish in this day and age there would be a single blood test and more specific treatment that would work for everyone. Frustration is an understatement.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I am a fellow survivor here on the forum.

I was on Xanax for quite some time and built up a resistance to it. It was no longer working. My psych doc took me off of the Xanax and I had the worst withdrawal symptoms I have ever known. It literally affected my body and the anxiety was so very bad. I went back and he had me take klonopin to down dose off of the Xanax. It really made such a huge difference for me with the withdrawal symptoms. The Xanax was making my thoughts confused for a very long time and until I was off of it, I had no idea how much it impaired my judgement.

I think from my own personal experience that being on Xanax for so long was the worst thing I could do.

I share this so you know at least one person who got addicted and was taken off and my anxiety just shot through the roof. I would never want to to go through that again.

So use please use caution in the use of those two benzos. You do need some extra help now with the use of medications and following your doctors orders is probably the best. Good luck with the anxiety issues and bringing it down to a more manageable level.

 

[AnonymousGirl99]

Thanks, Rain. I just regret everything med-wise. I wish I had never started taking anything. I really am starting to wonder if I've built up a resistance to the Xanax (it's physically impossible not to, right?). I haven't increased my daily dose too much - usually just two pills, which totals .5 mgs. Some days that's all I need, some days it's just barely getting me by, and some days it isn't enough. Unfortunately it's been the latter two lately.

I'll have to consider all of this. I wish docs were better advocates for their patients, at least in my experience. I'm advocating as much as I can, but I'm not well right now. I can only do so much. Thanks so much for your insight.

 

[ParalyzedMind]

First Ellie, I am sorry you are having bad experience with your doctors whoever they are. If you can get other ones, Please do if you think hey are not helping you.

Medications are needed for many people and the key is to have a good and strong communication with your physician. It is sometimes very overpowering or even intimidating to challenge those who prescribe medications to you, but you need to in order to build control over your life.

Personally, I never prescribed Xanax to anyone. Maybe I just never saw patients I thought would be right candidate, but to me it is too short-term and leads to emotional dependence of quick fix. I am sure it has its role, but i would never take it.

Otherwise, there is nothing Rsin said I disagree with. Right on!