I feel like i need help

[Freida]

LOL that was @freebird but it was brilliant so I'll take the credit :);)

 

[freebird]

Right now you're at a time when you are breaking down the only wall you never dared to cross, and you have yet to explore the new world behind, and it's painful. For some, breaking that wall has taken a few years. For others, not as long. The journey comes with un-learning the toxic bricks. Learning those things that will work for you to help you make your own happiness and break the wall. It takes a special person, with so much courage, to do what you are doing. You are very brave. This wall in front of you was built by someone else who forced you stay behind it. When in truth, nobody should have a wall in their life. I have learned that even in the US, freedom comes with choice. You have to choose to set yourself free, or you will remain trapped. It's all up to you, and you have to fight for it. Also, you are allowed to grieve all of the loss that the cult took from you. The time that was wasted, and the lies. It's your grief and the cult does not own that.

 

[saraemerald]

Right now you're at a time when you are breaking down the only wall you never dared to cross, and you...

Thank you @freebird . I didn'd have a chance to respond earlier cuz I had to work today, and I haven't been feeling well but thank you for responding. Your words are beautiful, deep and true. I will try to apply them to the best of my ability. We try to be "strong" sometimes whatever that means and then we don't want to be "strong" anymore and then take it all out on ourselves and make ourselves feel bad when we know the original source of our pain is whatever is forcing us to be who we are not

 

[freebird]

Thank you @freebird . I didn'd have a chance to respond earlier cuz I had to wor...

No worries! Totally know the feeling. It's okay if you don't feel strong. Part of taking out the toxic bricks is taking out those core beliefs that you aren't strong. Be very patient with yourself. The first step is waking up and finally not denying yourself peace. Take a deep breath and know you are on the right path. Don't ever tolerate anyone to force you to be who you are not from now on. It's time that people respect your way of life, not the other way around. It's your turn. Cut these cult people out like cancer, and you will start to feel so much better. You will become stronger, and you can finally make peace with your world because it is your world.

 

[saraemerald]

No worries! Totally know the feeling. It's okay if you don't feel strong. Part of taking out the toxic...

"Not denying yourself peace", can totally relate to that. I am doing that to myself currently and wondering how I got that way. Ugghh. It sucks