How do you stop dissociation?

[SeekingAfrica]

Obviously working with T would maybe help, working through whatever brought it up. Or taking time off. In the absence of that, or ability to get service dogs, what do you do?? I can take meds for panic attacks and work on overall health, but what about dissociation? For me it's one of the things most out of my control and that's horrifying...and probably making it worse. How can I have better control over it?

It's happened only few times this month, but that's few times too many. And it's usually at a bad moment(not that there is a good one.). Here is how it is for me: I get completely frozen. I know where I am and I'm present, so it's not like flashbacks. But it's like I 'pull back' in my mind. My heart doesn't race, but I can't move. I can't even open my eyes. I clutch my body together and it feels like I just cannot be there, cannot deal with that moment, but can't move either. I'm not upset, I just...can't move, breathe, open my eyes, in any way. I freeze. All the things I should be doing seem enormous, but yet I still can't move and eventually my mind scrambles any important things to the back of my mind because moving seems essential. Any outside noise feels intrusive and awful.

Eventually I push myself up to do one thing- doesn't matter what. Pushing myself out of that can take 30min, but it can take 3 hours if I'm in bad shape. Moving for the first hour is like a zombie, I walk slow and it's hard to make my body or mind comprehend anything. It feels like I'm in a dream. When I fully come out of that state I panic and hyperventilate about all the time I lost, and after allll that I am able to function, for the most part, but not for every job- I'm still a little de-concentrated and doing one part of my work that needs me to listen to audio and catch certain details just doesn't happen for a while more. Takes me few more hours of being really scatter-brained to get to regular state...

Again, that doesn't happen a lot, but when it does, as seen...it's bad! It happened today, the first part, and I got out of it, but it takes so long. And I still feel scattered and like I'll faint at any moment and the only way to work or do anything is 10min at a time...

 

[shimmerz]

Are you aware it is happening when it is or does a supporter or 3rd party need to bring your attention to it?
Also, what do you do now to bring yourself out?
Are you able to move your body through dissociation?
Are you aware of yourself during dissociative spells.?

 

[MyWillow]

Acute dissociative episodes mostly occur in session for me.

Outside of T I can really struggle getting functional in the morning after a night filled with disrupted sleep, nightmares and flashbacks. Icy cold drinks, crunching ice, feet on the cold floor all help.

Sometimes at work, anger and frustration can make feel dissociated and disconnected. Focusing as hard as possible on the TASK can really help.

However at the end of the day:
1. Dissociation tends to indicate that I’m under too much pressure (mostly self imposed - damned high achiever and people pleaser lol)
2. Therapy is going too fast. Need to slow the f*ck down
3. I need to take responsibility for calming my whole of self down after a dissociative episode. My new psydoc has suggested I try wrapping my arms around myself, stroking my arms gently like I would my cat and reassuring my body that I’m ok, I’m safe and I’m listening. I do not expect this to be effective overnight as I have zero self compassion. But I think she’s pretty amazing so I’m willing to give it a crack.

 

[SeekingAfrica]

Are you aware it is happening when it is or does a supporter or 3rd party need to bring your attention...

I am aware what is happening, yes, but vaguely. Like, I know where I am and what date it is, but time feels frozen and if I had a meeting at specific time, even important one, that would still not be able to bring me out.

I can't move my body in the actual dissociation part, as I described. I just lay there/stay there and all the things I should be doing race through my head, and I try to push myself and I still can't. Then usually that gets to me thinking of some trauma related things, because that is the first times I've experienced that feeling, I suppose. Anyway, I keep thinking random things and keep telling myself I have to move. Even if it were to do something calming or grounding. Anything. And I still can't move. I am aware, but vaguely, but it's like being in a dream that I can't control. Like I know if there are important things to do, but I can't think about them for long enough to actually somehow get myself up.

So I keep laying and I keep thinking in a ball on my bed, and the thoughts race, and I lay with my eyes sqeezed and my body frozen, feeling all hypervigilant and like this is the one day when skipping any time will somehow make my whole world fall apart. I keep telling myself there are important things to do and I have to get up, and in time, my body gets more present, and I can finally get up, but it can take 20min, or it can take hours...

When I finally get up I am present but still a bit like zombie, or like sleepwalking, it's hard to concentrate on things, I move slower and it's hard even taking steps forward. That takes another while to snap out of and then I'm just purely exhausted and completely freaked out about having to catch up on whatever I missed in the day...

 

[MyWillow]

I can relate in part. Pardon the pun ;)

I wake frozen in a panic multiple times a night and I’m working on point 3 above. Sometimes I can’t move to stroke my arms. I can’t speak so I think it. Sometimes I just hug my kitty or dog and focus on their energy.

 

[SeekingAfrica]

I can relate in part. Pardon the pun ;)

I wake frozen in a panic multiple times a night and I’m wo...

Yup. Sadly I have no clue how to get out. It just takes however long it takes and that sucks. I can move now, but I'm still not entirely okay enough to start work. And I know there is a lot to do, but my body feels too rundown still to even be sitting.

I've been trying to rest to hopefully feel normal and productive soon, and I've been thinking about it. And I kind of isolated that the times this has happened to me in the past months is whenever I face something huge that I can't change or postpone and for whatever reason think I can't handle it and I'm totally screwed.

This time I've been working towards certain documents for a year now. But the last part of it also included help from few people, and each one plays part. And in the last moment one of them may not be able to help for reason not depending on them. It would have been great to be altogether and not have needed anyone, but this has been the hardest year I've had in the last 10 years, so it is what it is. But the thing is, now there is no time to change plans. And things can fall apart in a moment tomorrow, and pretty much there is nothing I can do about it. My future is now dependent on luck tomorrow, pretty much. And I tried to find alternatives last night, and I couldn't so I told myself to chill and hope and do my usual work day and hope tomorrow works out. But I couldn't. All those hardships for a year, and it can all fall apart in a moment, and I don't even know what I would have to do if that happened. So I woke up and I was going to start and breathe and take it one task at a time and leave tomorrow for tomorrow....and then I couldn't get up. And here I am now, and the last 3 days are the most important of the whole year probably and am still barely functioning, and I will have to hope somehow that will be enough...I feel so broken.

 

[Deleted member 47384]

Have you tried doing any sort of grounding techniques? It seems a little simplistic, but it's helped me in the past. I had major issues with dissociation for most of my life.

Usually, I try to just stop and focus on all my senses. Where am I, what does it smell like, what textures am I feeling? Is it cold, warm, is there a smell? Anything that can help you feel like you're back in your body, so to speak.

I hope things get easier for you. You're doing the best you can, and that's all anyone can really hope for <3

 

[Starfire]

Obviously working with T would maybe help, working through whatever brought it up. Or taking time...

For me it was trial & error to just improve it. Shorten the time etc. Had to find what made me feel safe & present & not fight it. Made the conditions safe to dissociate. Unfortunately that changed over time too!! For awhile curling up in a weighted blanket helped. Went to a 3 step system like put my phone near me, then my dog on my lap, then some food or drink handy. Created a safe area with present day things. Slowly started recognizing the pre-dissociative warnings. Did whatever was my 3 step comforting steps...figured out ahead of time but not prepared ahead. Sometime having a trusted friend just be in the room was helpful. Had to do the same for the car. Not fighting it was the key for me. Taking comforting actions & complaining to my therapist that he wasn't fixing me. Don't know why he thought that was funny!! Take care of yourself.

 

[Abstract]

Hi! What have you tried grounding and prevention wise? Have you discussed this in therapy before?

 

[IceQueencop]

Remember that PTSD is a stress disorder. Your body physically can’t tell the difference between your work stress and your original trauma stress, so it reacts by shutting you down.
It sounds like you know what is triggering you, so finding another way to deal with your work stress will probably benefit you greatly. Be sure you have a sleep hygiene or routine that gets you to sleep in a neutral frame of mind, like shower, brush teeth, do sudoku, meditation or something neutral every night before bed, so you are signaling to your body that everything is ok. If you get into the routine of doing this every night, it will benefit you when you are at your most stressed by calming your body.
The more calming, mindfulness rituals or routines you have, the less likely you are to trigger.
Best wishes.

 

[SeekingAfrica]

Remember that PTSD is a stress disorder. Your body physically can’t tell the difference between y...

I realised recently that it's been all building towards a PTSD relapse of sorts. I've been more hyperviliant now too, dissociating more, I'm back to sleeping badly and nightmares...Last night I had my first flashback(s) in a while. I've been stressed a lot in the last year and did not get triggered like that. But I realised today the exact stress related sequence of events that triggered me. Wish I'd realised that earlier. I am working towards reducing stress of course, but that will take a while more than expected (originally I thought August 1st will make things easier, but now it seems it may take another month or 2).

REALLY struggling with routine. I'm still maintaining the main things(showers, teeth, doing dishes etc. etc.) but my order of what I do when has went out the door for few months and although I've extensively read on planning and routines and organisation(a bit of a hobby of mine) I struggle maintaining order to anything I do lately. The only thing that has structure in my life right now is keeping time sensitive appointments or errands in offices that close early. Everything else has no exact schedule. It's still getting done, just in whatever order I can manage that day depending on my health level.

First I stopped having energy for paper planner few months back(and that is the only schedule that ever worked for me). Then I tried to get back to gCal, in combo with to-do list app, and that was okay for a while until my anxiety really hit high and I was too overwhelmed. For a while I was holding onto simply having a todo list by days of the week in that app and that was working...and then right before I started my anxiety meds, that started being impossible too, and any scheduling other than super urgent things went out the window. I'm trying to get better, the meds and vaguely starting to help, but I've completely lost control of the order of my day, schedule, routine and all that and I'm struggling to get back into it without starting to feel overwhelmed again.

Have you tried doing any sort of grounding techniques? It seems a little simplistic, but

Thanks! Grounding has worked for me only at the start of a panic attack, but never with dissociation so far, my mind seems to get completely unconcentrated. Self-soothing helps sometimes- combination of few things I've noticed- really sour gum/candy, really hot drink, and fidget spinner seem to be interesting combo. Fast working, but short effect only:(. I want to make myself bigger self-care box with more of these things, but it will take a while when I'm in proper state. And when I have any money to spare too. This is still a start, I guess.

For me it was trial & error to just improve it. For awhile curling up in a weighted blanket helped. ...put my phone near me, then my dog on my lap, then some food or drink handy. Created a safe area with present day things.

Yup, working on it too. So far sour candy, hot drinks and fidget toys are doing something(only in combination), but I need more for sure. Will start working on meditation when calm, so that it can hopefully work in distress as well. I heard about weighted blankets, and thought they could help, but they don't have them hear(to my knowledge) so I would have to ship them either for more money or from far, and it's 'weighted' blanket, who knows how much it will cost to ship across an ocean...Maybe one day. Planning used to calm my daily stress leading to less episodes, but I lost the habit altogether and not sure how to get back to it.
Sadly I don't have an animal. I do have my phone near me. I think it would benefit me to buy headphones and simple mp3 soon, I didn't realised how much it calmed me when traveling in bus when I'm more anxious. I guess even just healdphones and my phone will do for now but I can't afford getting them right now...we'll see. What would you suggest to put in a 'safe area'? I work from home which does help in those times I think because I'm in as much familiar setting as I can...can I do anything to help that too?

Hi! What have you tried grounding and prevention wise? Have you discussed this in therapy before?

See the answers up in terms of grounding and prevention. Also one more thing I do are regular dance classes, which are physically intense so they definitely ground me a bit, it's usually the best part of my week, and other than home, the only other place that feels like my safe place. Like, any other area in my life would start having issues before this does.

 

[SeekingAfrica]

My best friend was feeling I wasn't letting her in how I'm doing in the last months and I tried to tell her as honestly as I could. She was asking me to reach out more in the really bad moments, and we tried to come up with things she can help with....
So today I tried to tell her what things may help ground me if I'm in distress(dissociating and having flashbacks) and somehow manage to call her, since I know that in such moments talking or even typing is really hard. So I told her all I know that could help so far. I am a little in shock with myself that I told someone that. I've told people I have flashbacks but usually they have no clue how to help. And I've always felt too vulnerable to explain to anyone what I actually need in those moment because I still feel freakish for having them at all. So...I let her in a bit more...I seriously can't believe this is happening.