How do you identify/ define "dissociation" and how do you identify/ define "grounded"

[Deleted member 47099]

Hi all,

I'm trying to reduce the amount of time I spend dissociated and am looking at good grounding techniques.

I'm wondering tho, how do you guys "tell" when you are dissociated and how do you "tell" you are grounded?

So obvious dissociation signs for me are feeling numb, feeling spacy, not feeling my body, feeling empty, feeling like my head is full of static.

Signs I'm grounded are deep relaxation, inner peace, not feeling anxious, pleasant clarity in my head.

How do you notice either of those states? Any tell-tale signs?

All ideas/ tips welcome! :)

 

[shimmerz]

Yeah, I feel my eyes do the thousand mile stare. That's really the indicator for me. I repair that and come into a grounded state by eating hot or sour candies, to come back into my body again. Grounded? For me that is being aware of where I am, what time it is, what colours are around me, textures of things.

 

[EveHarrington]

I just go by grounded——100% in the present moment; dissociated——not 100% in the present moment.

 

[Deleted member 47099]

I'm reading up a bit more on grounding techniques and found this quite helpful:

"Grounding techniques orient one in the present and to achieve a healthy medium between being cut off from or overwhelmed by emotions."

I like that point about the healthy medium between numb and flooding re emotions.

Grounding Techniques

Staying Present During Trauma Therapy: Grounding Techniques

 

[Abstract]

Good topic.

I don't know. Identifying D for me has been like peeling an onion. Every time I think its all peeled away (I have identified all the D) another layer is revealed.

So started off with the being outside the body stuff and the outside world and body parts being distorted.
then the losing awareness of surrounds, big distortions in time,
then feeling body, being in body, being spacey, spaced out, time being distorted, emotions gone
then me being slow me being clumsy
then me not being able to speak or stand or use my arm etc.
Then realising numb parts to body,
etc etc.

I guess its about feeling connected to myself, my surroundings, time, feeling.

Maybe its me but to me grounding doesnt always feel happy blissful state. Especially if coming out if dissociation. Maybe depends what type of grounding? To me its being in my body and self and sometimes that is very uncomfortable. Understatement of the year, But I guess I can then ground my emotions. Calm myself. I may have that wrong,

 

[shimmerz]

Maybe its me but to me grounding doesnt always feel happy blissful state.

Imagine my shock and horror when I finally attained my goal of not dropping into dissociation and realizing that I WANTED to dissociate. That was a hard pill to swallow.

 

[Abstract]

Imagine my shock and horror when I finally attained my goal of not dropping into dissociation and realizing that I WANTED to dissociate. That was a hard pill to swallow.

Know that one very well! x

 

[Deleted member 47099]

Good topic.

I don't know. Identifying D for me has been like peeling an onion. Every time I think its all peeled away (I have identified all the D) another layer is revealed.

OMG yes!!!!!! :laugh:

Same here.

I'm like "Oh yeah, I "get" how dissociation works now, cool..." And then *bam* another layer...!
I'm actually finding it suuuuuuper interesting, when it's not being annoying/ frustrating/ inconvenient/ distressing :laugh:

I think I have a whole bunch of learning-layers yet to go about dissociation. It's actually quite a fascinating thing! :)

Edit to add: And yeah, some of the layers are really "obvious" but a lot of the layers are really subtle.

I keep reading that a classic hallmark of dissociation is "the person may not even be aware that they are doing it" which certainly rings true to me *some* of the time. Sometimes I'm totally aware I'm dissociating, other times not at all!! :facepalm:
Sometimes I'm noticing "something weird" and then years later I'm like "OMG, that's dissociation too?! Who knew!"

 

[MyWillow]

Further to @Abstract ’s fine post I did a Pilates class a few weeks ago and experienced zero muscle pain although I was pushing myself really hard. Yep, could barely walk for 3 days. My psydoc suspects that’s not the first time. Dissociation can pop up in unexpected forms.

 

[TTC18]

Imagine my shock and horror when I finally attained my goal of not dropping into dissociation and realizing that I WANTED to dissociate. That was a hard pill to swallow.

Yep...

 

[frogthroat]

The being numb and floaty are all signs for me too. I know I'm starting to dissociate when the voice in my head is a man's and not mine.

 

[Deleted member 47099]

The being numb and floaty are all signs for me too. I know I'm starting to dissociate when the voice in my head is a man's and not mine.

Oh, excellent point! I have a certain form of dissociation (doesn't always happen) where I stop having a sense of gender.

I'm a cis female, so I'm female and identify as such, emotionally, and there's a form of dissociation that is really miserable for me and one of the (many) things that happens is that I can't "feel" my gender anymore. It's like I'm of no gender/ neutral gender and the female and male attributes feel approx. equally strong.

As it ties into abuse stuff, this is one of the dissociation types that totally freaks me out and triggers me a lot.

And it's also one of the dissociation types that took me years and years to recognise... Cos why would you think that "feeling a loss of gender" could be one of the many strange things that happens between the connection of brain and body in some types of dissociation.

It's still really hard for me to *notice* this type of dissociation, cos the second the lack-of-gender symptom starts, I'm like *bam* triggers/ trauma/ flashbacks... :facepalm: