We need to create 1 unified language for our diaries

[joeylittle]

We need to unite to help researchers help us and help the next generation.

What would that look like - as in, is there something that you're envisioning, or some way that we are interfering with current research? I just don't think I'm understanding.

 

[TruthSeeker]

Aw! We need to unite to help researchers help us and help the next generation.

I don't know that there's a true "need" to change how I write my own experiences. I'm a writer by trade.....and that alone....my words, expressions, idioms ......will NEVER be changed for anyone else including science. I spent a life time monitoring my verbal expressions out of my mouth.....I wouldn't come here if I had to learn a new way to write, and frankly, I want to reflect who I am.....by how I choose to communicate.....writing is as personal to me as creating art, music, or photographic images is to another...... when we create from our soul, there should be no rules to interfere with such a personally significant internal process.

 

[EveHarrington]

Do you mean in our diaries HERE?

Aren’t our posts copy written? Or am I thinking of another site? So….this makes it such that researchers can’t take anything posted here. (Or did the rules change? I can’t keep up.)

We all know nothing is truly private/safe online, but at the same time, most of us probably wouldn’t have a diary if it was subjected to scrutiny by researchers.

Plus there’s no way of verifying anything here, not a diagnosis, nothing. So, it would be the most worthless research endeavor ever as no valid conclusions could be drawn.

 

[joeylittle]

(Or did the rules change? I can’t keep up.)

They did - the site now leaves the ownership of posts to the members - but by posting it, you're granting the site a license to display that post on the forum. All this means is, if someone came along and copied a member's post into their blog (or whatnot), it's up to that member to issue the request for it to be taken down (if. they want). - we don't make that decision on the member's behalf.

Plus there’s no way of verifying anything here, not a diagnosis, nothing.

^^^ This is the main thing, I'm glad you brought it up.

 

[DharmaGirl]

If I wanted to be studied, I'd apply for a research group.

 

[Widow_of_one]

I don't know that there's a true "need" to change how I write my own experiences. I'm a writer by trade.....and that alone....my words, expressions, idioms ......will NEVER be changed for anyone else including science. I spent a life time monitoring my verbal expressions out of my mouth.....I wouldn't come here if I had to learn a new way to write, and frankly, I want to reflect who I am.....by how I choose to communicate.....writing is as personal to me as creating art, music, or photographic images is to another...... when we create from our soul, there should be no rules to interfere with such a personally significant internal process.

You need to change your attitude to help the future generations live through their hell and stop worrying about nonsense

What would that look like - as in, is there something that you're envisioning, or some way that we are interfering with current research? I just don't think I'm understanding.

Thank you for your concern and trying to understand what I am saying! Ok I’m sorry. I have invented a language to explain - describe - what is going On. I am always reading: not much is known about incest victims. I thought, we need to unify our language so that any researcher or any survivor can read what we wrote and to get “relief” or understanding” to give them comfort

 

[Widow_of_one]

We need to make decisions as to how to write our experiences so that researchers can interpret what er are saying. Remeber the “I love Lucy” episode where they had a chain of people each speaking a seperae language in order to understand what was going on? We need to make a group decision as to how a “diary entry” is to be labeled. Plain and Simple: we need to help the children suffering right now!

 

[Widow_of_one]

Do you mean in our diaries HERE?

Aren’t our posts copy written? Or am I thinking of another site? So….this makes it such that researchers can’t take anything posted here. (Or did the rules change? I can’t keep up.)

We all know nothing is truly private/safe online, but at the same time, most of us probably wouldn’t have a diary if it was subjected to scrutiny by researchers.

Plus there’s no way of verifying anything here, not a diagnosis, nothing. So, it would be the most worthless research endeavor ever as no valid conclusions could be drawn.

Omg! Stop with the crazy talk. Seriously we are all alive - we’ve suffered but we have made it! Let’s stop the Crazy and settle on a language! One language to help the children! We are their only hope! Right?

Yes our diaries here!

 

[somerandomguy]

I'm pretty sure I'm using language to talk about my experiences in my diary.

I'm not quite sure what you mean by "crazy." Can you clarify? Because I don't know where you're seeing that.

 

[FauxLiz]

And I am pretty sure that if I wanted someone to define how I speak about my experiences I would still be living with my abusers who directed and scripted what were the proper terminology and phrases to be used to describe my experiences and feelings. Thank you but no thank you @Widow_of_one you are welcome to join a research project if that is your choice and how you choose to help others here now and in the future. Me, I personally am doing my best to get through each day, some definitely not as well as others and having to watch what I say, and how I say it, when I come here for peer support because you feel we should be thrilled with the idea of being some sort of research specimens that have again been dehumanized for someone else’s benefit! NO THANK YOU.

If you don’t like the way that the diaries are done here, a suggestion put some time, effort, and money into the development of your own site, where you can develop a terminology and language, defined rule set for users to agree to adopt when they participate. Don’t join a successful site 15 years down the line and try to change it to fit your needs. Sorry if I sound angry and frustrated but I am going through some stuff right now and people have been politely trying say that this is not something that we the users or Anthony the founder appear to be interested in so please let it drop.

 

[Widow_of_one]

What would that look like - as in, is there something that you're envisioning, or some way that we are interfering with current research? I just don't think I'm understanding.

Wel ok I am glad that you asked. First of all I’ve realized that a “Fb” is not one event it is a cluster of memories that happened before or after. So your mind will show you “happy” things that happened then it will show the sad trauma that you experienced . And there are such things as: an emotional Fb contrary to what people have said heee - even the guy who runs this site has said that “there is no such things as emotional Fb”
Anyway, I have invented my own personal language and I think it makes reading my diary on thsi site difficult. Ok I get it I don’t have the expertise most of you have: I have a tendency to hide.
I have noticed that I have perfect feelings of joy about a moment on my life: I call them “moments of clarity” - (abbreviated MOc)…
As I’ve progressed with my “fbs” I’ve created a language to explain what I feeling.
That seems natural and “logical” right?
I realize that when I post in my diary that the “coding” that I use baffles the readers. That isn’t hood bc I am trying to Help the reader understand what I am saying to hep them!! And they can’t understand bc they don’t know what my codes are: I have got to say that an old boyfriend read my diary and he was a bit baffled. He is a medial professional and is interested in what I have to say. And he said my blig here was confusing bc he Kept havign to go back to figure iut
Who was who! (I use abbreviations instead of actual names!)
We need to create 1 language that we all speak to write our diaries so than any of us, not just “researches”, can understand what I am saying: this is important bc our “voice/diary entry” will save LIVES! We need to have a positive flow of communication to help each other “problem solve” our everyday issues. For example, I’ve noticed that I get “intrusive thoughts” about an ex. In the past I thought; thsi means I live him snd need to go back to him.
Now I see that “it isn’t that I loved him” it is just my mind trying to process what he did to me so that I can get angry and move on.

simplicity we need a simple language that helps the future live, stay alive and prosper. This is what I’ve been doing for the past 35 years!

Do you mean in our diaries HERE?

Aren’t our posts copy written? Or am I thinking of another site? So….this makes it such that researchers can’t take anything posted here. (Or did the rules change? I can’t keep up.)

We all know nothing is truly private/safe online, but at the same time, most of us probably wouldn’t have a diary if it was subjected to scrutiny by researchers.

Plus there’s no way of verifying anything here, not a diagnosis, nothing. So, it would be the most worthless research endeavor ever as no valid conclusions could be drawn.

yes our diaries here firstly. Image that I speak America English And you speak Spanish? How could we communicate we don’t have a common language.
We need a common launguage!

I don't know that there's a true "need" to change how I write my own experiences. I'm a writer by trade.....and that alone....my words, expressions, idioms ......will NEVER be changed for anyone else including science. I spent a life time monitoring my verbal expressions out of my mouth.....I wouldn't come here if I had to learn a new way to write, and frankly, I want to reflect who I am.....by how I choose to communicate.....writing is as personal to me as creating art, music, or photographic images is to another...... when we create from our soul, there should be no rules to interfere with such a

And I am pretty sure that if I wanted someone to define how I speak about my experiences I would still be living with my abusers who directed and scripted what were the proper terminology and phrases to be used to describe my experiences and feelings. Thank you but no thank you @Widow_of_one you are welcome to join a research project if that is your choice and how you choose to help others here now and in the future. My I personally am doing my best to get through each day some definitely not as well as others and having to watch what I say and how I say it when I come here for peer support because you feel we should be thrilled with the idea of being some sort of research specimens that have again been dehumanized for someone’s benefit NO THANK YOU.

If you don’t like the way that the diaries are done here, a suggestion put some time effort and money into the development of y oh r own site where you can develop a terminology and language defined rule set for users to agree to adopt when they participate. Don’t join a successful site 15 years down the line and try to change it to fit your needs. Sorry if I sound angry and frustrated but I am going through some stuff right now and people have been politely trying say that this is not something that we the users or Anthony the founder appear to be interested in so please let it drop you.

And I need your anger because why? Lmfao. I am glad that you don’t get this! Really “goodbye”

and perhaps getting my own site is the solution. You are kidding yourself that “Pedafiles/sexual abusers” aren’t “organized”. They isolate the victim in order to demean them and convince them that they are “all alone.”

You need to do some reading about this.. hey do me a favor and block me bc I have a mission and you are not helping.

 

[TruthSeeker]

and perhaps getting my own site is the solution. You are kidding yourself that “Pedafiles/sexual abusers” aren’t “organized”. They isolate the victim in order to demean them and convince them that they are “all alone.”

You need to do some reading about this.. hey do me a favor and block me bc I have a mission and you are not helping.

You said "we need to make decisions......." assuming you are referring to members on the thread and in the forum....and me. That sounds pretty commanding..... almost demanding....and it feels emotionally manipulating...and all about the children now. People come here to get their lives and heads straightened out....not to satisfy your ideas on how we should change what we are doing in our own healing process, to do what you think is best for an even greater purpose-the children. I think most people here recognize that PTSD will continue to be a mental health disorder and there's no quick fix. For the vast majority, we are all trying to heal. That looks and happens differently in everyone.

Gotta tell you, I came here in my 60's, long after my trauma happened and there is nothing research could have done to prevent the multiple traumas that occurred to me. Reseach wouldn't have stopped my parents from drinking or made them pay more attention to what was going on. I think people's narratives are pretty clear....person (s) X, did something terrible to person Y to cause trauma, or medical diagnosis X impacted person Y and created trauma, or situation X (like a dead body) was viewed by person Y, and person Y has some form of trauma as a result. Then you add the co-morbid mental and physical health issues....and it's not as simple of a solution as you think......

There is no pill to fix this, people's brains are different and some people are impacted more than others by the exact same situation, and everyone copes differently. When you are dealing with a person's brain, brain chemistry and neuronal networking, there are too many variables.....so I suggest you focus on something more realistic and productive than expecting this group of people to change how they tell their narrative.....and consider reducing your stress load over the suffering children whom we have no control over. Yes.....it is sad, but actions from this group of people changing how they write their narrative isn't going to stop another's trauma. I'm 50 years worth of trauma.....and need to get myself straightened out....so I can live the last years of my life.....happier then the first ones.

The way you craft your concern sounds like a societal problem..........

Solutions for the children: That no parent who doesn't have a wholesome set of values, while really wanting and planning to have their own children, promise in writing to take an active role in parenting, and refrain from drug use and alcohol use, and promise to take care of them with love....and teach them about feelings and community involvement.
Here's an idea.....I think the government should have minimum requirements for parenting in order to pass a parenting test with 90% accuracy (only 90% accuracy because there is no individual parenting manual when the child is born). Or the government decides not to reprogram soldiers to kill so our children can go into the military "safely" and not come out with PTSD, or we change the way death happens so nobody has to watch it ......because it can be excruciating to watch someone die....slowly.........or we cure all diseases to prevent medical trauma and everyone takes an annual shot so they won't have sexual urges and take them out on kids.....and I could go on.....trauma happens because of many things......some intentional, some accidental, and some unintentional acts.....

It's not as simple as "how one writes their narrative'......and I doubt that the information gathered would help save the suffering children......because it is the parents who entrust their children to be with community leaders, church leaders, and the like so that they don't have to be as involved....as far as blocking you.....I don't know how and just because you don't like my input doesn't give you the right to ask me to leave......that's rather rude on a forum.