Lilac98
Policy Enforcement
I've had tics for a few years after developing over time extreme social anxiety. My family said they don't know anyone else that will uncontrollably shake and twitch like I do from anxiety even if it's bad anxiety. Does anyone on here have a problem with this. I think I'm really slowly starting to find being around people easier. I go out with my autism worker twice a week somewhere quiet normally. We've now been to a supermarket and a shop in town once when I went to see where something was for a covid jab. We've been walking to a quiet bus stop in preparation for me getting on the bus to go to the library in the next town. Sometimes I feel like I've not gotten anywhere but my autism worker points out that I used to hide behind the sofa and not talk to her until I got used to her even being in the same room. I still really struggle with my sister doing my hair but I've managed to not move so much from panicking which makes it slightly easier for her. It's been ages since I threw up and nearly passed out in the middle of having my hair dried and before that bleached though I don't think the bleach smell helped with that. I don't have a clear reason why I ever developed such bad social anxiety though I wonder if it might have been a subconscious thing cause of being around grandad after he got out of prison for abusing my sisters when I was 11 and being scared he'd abuse me which he did and I forgot about it for years until remembering it last year (I'm 23) and him living with us when he wasn't well and having to stay upstairs so there were no problems when they took nanny to hospital appointments and I was left alone with him. He couldn't get upstairs. I was too panicky to eat with my family around that time so I could eat in a separate room but I'd still panic wherever I was and struggle to eat. I don't think I'll ever get back to where I was but I've got somewhere.