Sexual Assault Embarrassment during orgasm.

[SeaLionMan1982]

Anyone else embarrassed for how your body reacts even during consensual activity? I've had some embarrassing things happen.

 

[Movingforward10]

Hi @SeaLionMan1982
Do you want to work on the embarrassment of what your body does?

I've not been embarrassed as such about what my body does at point of orgasm I've been deeply upset about crying after. And various other things.
It's all challenging to work through.

 

[SeaLionMan1982]

Hi @SeaLionMan1982
Do you want to work on the embarrassment of what your body does?

I've not been embarrassed as such about what my body does at point of orgasm I've been deeply upset about crying after. And various other things.
It's all challenging to work through.

Only so much I can do about what my body does :-(

 

[Movingforward10]

Only so much I can do about what my body does :-(

Sure. I wondered about the feelings about it as opposed to what it is.

 

[SeaLionMan1982]

Sure. I wondered about the feelings about it as opposed to what it is.

Oh feelings of embarrassment and awkwardness, feeling shameful.

 

[SeaLionMan1982]

I wouldn't mind talking about it in more detail. I'm sorry you cry after orgasms does it (orgasming) bring you back to your abuse/trigger/PTSD or whatever you call it?

 

[Rose White]

I wouldn't mind talking about it in more detail.

What are you embarrassed about? Tell more about that. I’m in a similar place as MovingForward and you except I can’t (yet!) be with another person.

 

[SeaLionMan1982]

What are you embarrassed about? Tell more about that. I’m in a similar place as MovingForward and you except I can’t (yet!) be with another person.

Sometimes I fart, I butterfly my legs open and then straighten them over and over, my legs shake, my facial expressions such as scrunching up and sticking my tongue out, I’ve also been told by people I’m loud and a lot comes out.

 

[Rose White]

@SeaLionMan1982 idk I guess sex is pretty funny from an objective perspective If you can’t reconcile your embarrassment then prob talk to your therapist about it?

 

[SeaLionMan1982]

@SeaLionMan1982 idk I guess sex is pretty funny from an objective perspective If you can’t reconcile your embarrassment then prob talk to your therapist about it?

What issues are you having? Maybe hearing what you are going through will help me to feel better since it will make me feel like I’m not the only one.

 

[Rose White]

Sometimes I fart, I butterfly my legs open and then straighten them over and over, my legs shake, my facial expressions such as scrunching up and sticking my tongue out, I’ve also been told by people I’m loud and a lot comes out

I think I’ve done all these things. I think there is this romantic view of sex that it’s so sensual and beautiful but in reality it can be quite messy and our bodies do things that we would never do “in polite company”—which I think is one reason it so exciting for so many people? Because “normal” manners don’t apply? (When else are you going to sit on someone’s face—which is something I still cannot get my mind around but am aware that some people have lots of fun doing something like that.)

These are all my guesses. And I think csa f*cks with our brains so much because we know how sex is done “wrong”—manipulation, violence, etc. and we want to then avoid hurting others (because we might see sex as inherently violent) or avoid being vulnerable and abandoned or want to do it the “right way” (impossible) or myriad other things.