How to stop depersonalization/disassociation?

[user57631]

I am new here, hello. Eastern Canada if that matters.

I’m coming up on 60 years of PTSD. Just took a trip to my ‘second home’. I knew it had changed but I wasn’t prepared. Since I’ve been back I have plunged into a deep depression, and my anxiety is so bad that I have been completely out of it, like watching myself do things as if it was someone else…

Is this depersonalization or disassociation?

I don’t know if there is an answer here in Eastern Canada. Can’t access therapy, I am old and broke. If there is anyone else from Newfoundland in particular I would appreciate your input…TIA

 

[Ecdysis]

Hey there, I've found this Youtube channel on DP/DR really helpful.

Depersonalization Manual

• I Help People Trapped In DPDR To Fully Recover • Feel Clear, Normal & 100% Like Yourself Again • Proven Step-by-Step Recovery System • 50,000+ Helped Over 20+ Years • Start Your Recovery Today 👇

www.youtube.com

It can be a mix of depersonalisation and derealisation. It's horrible, isn't it.

Have you tried using the AI therapy here or ChatGPT as a therapist? They're a great option if you can't afford or access therapy. It's amazing how far the AI has come. Give it instructions to talk to you like a trauma therapist and give it some background info about your PTSD. Look at a couple of its answers and work out what style you'd prefer. Often, I limit mine to like 5 sentences, cos else it talks a LOT and I can't follow that much info at once.

Depersonalization-derealization disorder - Symptoms and causes

www.mayoclinic.org

Edit to add: I should add that I found some of the "recovery" DPDR videos grating after a while, on that youtube channel. Their focus is 100% on "YOU CAN GET OVER THIS!" which yes, is a super helpful message on one level, but maybe not the only important point? But it is the best source for DPDR that I'm aware of.
What helped me most with this approach was truly learning to say "This feeling that I'm dead and only going through the motions - IT'S A SYMPTOM - it doesn't mean I'm truly dead, however convincing the feeling is."
So, by learning to see it as JUST A SYMPTOM, you can learn to ride it out, learn to ground yourself, do little things to prove to yourself that you are alive, and then the symptom can start fading into the background over time.

 

[user57631]

Hey there, I've found this Youtube channel on DP/DR really helpful.

Thanks for your reply. I’m glad to hear you are feeling better through AI and YouTube.

I have tried the virtual route. I did, however, have access to a psychologist for a while, thanks to the financial support of a very dear friend. Working with her on the cognitive processing therapy model was magic for me…psychiatrists and counsellors (social workers) was a dead end for me.

I plan on selling a precious but unused musical instrument to fund a few more sessions. That is, unfortunately, my best option.

Once again, thank you for your support, I wish you all the best

RogerP