What To Never Say To A Ptsd Sufferer

[Mandy Tad]

Hi Jaret, your questions are tough. I have been thinking since the past hour and then I actually asked one of my childhood friends to tell me what was ME. this is what she said This is ME as she remembers -jovial, witty, creative, adventurous, ambitious and yes naughty too.

This is me as of today and since the past few years - Scared, terrified, I smile so that people do not see my feelings, I joke to make people happy, I feel judged and hence have to work harder to prove myself. I am paranoid and nervous wreck, I do not trust people, I pretend to be brave but inside I am churning with fear.I dont like people who yell or scream. I scream and get angry easily. I am a bunch of nerves in front of people. I keep checking my work all the time. I keep checking my emails all the time to ensure I have done all my work before anyone can find a fault to pick on me. I hate loud noises, I freak out if things do not go as planned. If my daughter is to come home at a particular time, if she does not my mind wanders into the worst possible situations, even if my neighbors do not come home on time I go into panic mode. We did a few renovations at home, for weeks I went crazy thinking and having dreams that the place was going to fall apart, I went so crazy that I called an inspector to check the place not once but twice. and then still had to make sure. It was like work, make sure Mandy make sure everything is covered or else they will pick on you again and start a new problem. I am insane.

 

[Tanishq]

I am insane.

No, you're not. You are strong person who is dealing with insane situation. You're strong.

Mandy, don't be hard on yourself. :hug:

 

[Shellbell]

Never say 'So is the therapy getting easier now?' after only 2 months of therapy.

Errrrr....no.......now facing exposure therapy and EMDR. Definitely not getting easier.

 

[sunshineontheway]

I have had none of the above treatments. The meds are helping me but it does not help when someone yells at me or behaves rudely towards me, I end up crying and hysterical.

Mandy , I have resonance with you , I was so disappointed to the phychologist doctor in my place , that I prefer to turing to Self hep books for help ..... Moreover ,same with you , PTSD effect my previous job severly .....A concludsion is more than correct , saying it's painful during trauma , but after it's nightmare.......

 

[InHell11]

'At least don't be a hindrance.' apparently because when my moms boyfriend said that I went pretty crazy. But there was lots of mail and paper to throw so I doubt I broke anything too important.

 

[Springer80]

But there was lots of mail and paper to throw so I doubt I broke anything too important.

OOOooooo plate smasher!!! We'll call you The Greek! ;)

 

[Mandy Tad]

Sunshine on the way, :) hugs to you. A nightmare that we have to go through only. I had one said to me recently - You do not have PTSD, you have depression and anxiety. Considering that I was diagnosed with PTSD and been advised to enter myself into a hospital after I tried to jump in front of a train, I am now being told that workplace bullying does not cause PTSD. I made a choice for myself and yes it is not the easy road. I made a choice to fight the PTSD and get back to working. I dont know if I will have more flashbacks, going back to work brings back the memories especially at interviews when asked of my work experience at my previous job. I am a wreck but I will push forward and no one will stop me.

 

[Springer80]

Anything about para-olympians and people with real disabilities having it properly hard.

I'll give you something to feel disadvantaged about if you could get off your misinformation horse called Prejudice for a mo.

 

[InHell11]

OOOooooo plate smasher!!! We'll call you The Greek! ;)

I wanted to throw the plate in my room onto the hard floor as well as all the cups on my desk but somehow I was able to not.

 

[sunshineontheway]

Mandy,

Yes, very uneasy with PTSD on the way, even word cannot express all... sometimes it's hard to move on. I used to try a way to end up myself, but god saved me back. From then on, I tell myself never do this again, even I am trapped in great adversity..... Last month I resigned because the work is of high pressure and strength, much over work...... My PTSD deteriorate, I feel anxious easily, feeling myself clumsy, foolish, feel something out of control and I really did something wrong which make my client lost money. I really hate myself.... My mom always said if you are a stong-willed person you would not lose job easily... I scold her in my heart that if you're not my mom, I would not be hurt to such a humble state.

Mandy, I am also not good at the moment, but we still need to go on with it no matter bad or good... But I beleive something could be changed if we try to find new ways... I recommend you with some self-help book, which I think quite useful to PTSD, they are <life after trauma> by Dena Rosenbloom, <The post traumatic stress disorder Sourcebook : A guide to healing , recovery and growth> by Glenn R. Schiraldi (could be bought in Amazon.com). Moreover, the books posted in Book Column in this forum are also very helpful!

 

[Mandy Tad]

Me too Sunshine, last month I tried to end myself when I had another flashback. I found I had no control on myself and jumping in front of the train was a really nice option. Since then I been put on stronger meds which are keeping me sane. I know how much it hurts when people you love say the wrong things. Big hugs to you, I know how much it has hurt you to leave your job, I have done the same. I was told to walk away and give myself time to heal. The pain is very difficult to go away.

Yes we still need to go on, but slowly. I find during the day when I have a good moment I get all excited and want to do things now, My psychologist says we need to listen to our body telling us it is needing time to heal from the trauma and get to know ourselves again.

I have been advised to read a book called Mind over Matter. Will try and look up the books you mentioned. I believe we can all heal ourselves if we give ourselves time. But during this time we yet have to face up with people who try to help but in reality are hurting us.

I receive these positive quotes from friends everyday and ended up asking them to stop as all those quotes mean nothing to me, being kind to others does not fit in my world right now after what I went through with the bullies.

 

[sunshineontheway]

Me too Sunshine, last month I tried to end myself when I had another flashback. I found I had no control on myself and jumping in front of the train was a really nice option. Since then I been put on stronger meds which are keeping me sane. I know how much it hurts when people you love say the wrong things. Big hugs to you, I know how much it has hurt you to leave your job, I have done the same. I was told to walk away and give myself time to heal. The pain is very difficult to go away.

Yes , (((((big hug))))) :hug: ... I can understand the feeling of no end of darkness , no way of going ahead , obstacles everywhere...... I used to did the same , but god did't let me go ...so I stay and determinded to survive & fight with my destiny......At first I've not any idear whehter I could get a little improved (psychologist in my place just ask patient to take medicine & do not talk for more than an hour , moreover , monthly medicines are very expensive) , latter I browse some website and found a book name <life after trauma> and it was strongly recommended by a patient who's on the way of healing....I tried to read this book , and use some of the therapy it mentioned and find it works on me , though I am not healed , but feeling myself getting better .....