What To Never Say To A Ptsd Sufferer

[sunshineontheway]

Yes we still need to go on, but slowly. I find during the day when I have a good moment I get all excited and want to do things now, My psychologist says we need to listen to our body telling us it is needing time to heal from the trauma and get to know ourselves again.

Yes, step by step, no greed on the way of healing, not to set any extra challenges to ourselves.... Wouds need time to be healed.

I used to tell my traumatic story to my closest friend, and in the middle narrative, I was cut because my friend told me she feel dizzy and uncomfortable with it. And at dinner time of a family gathering my cousin sister's husband said to me that I don't understand why you prefer sitting in front of the computer rather than going out for any activities or having fun with people. Why you couldn't lean anything good from your elder and younger sister? At that time, I couldn't control of emotion and soon burst out into tears... I shed tears for an hour and regain clam for another hour and leave the dinner place at last... This happens a lot and now I try not to listen to other's <encouragement>, I try to make option according to my heart, my willingness.

 

[Mandy Tad]

Hi Sunshine, yes I have had to hear and face all of the above. Every time something happens I cry and cry. It is so hurtful when family members say such things. I have chosen not to tell anyone anything anymore. If I want to say anything I sit and tell myself. I dont even trust my own doctor or psychologist anymore. They think seeing a psychiatrist is the best, this psychiatrist keeps saying it is all okay and if I am looking for a job it shows I am getting much better and I am okay. I have decided no point in telling anyone anything anymore.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

This was actually said to me, Never ever say this to a ptsd sufferer. You are demon possessed and you worship satan. This did a number on my and my family for years. Toxic people that are religous zeolots.

 

[Shellbell]

Oh Gizmo, that must have all been horrendous hugs ((((Gizmo)))).

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Thanks Shellbell. I had no defense against the lethal gossip this started. I was labeled and stigmatized. It is good that we finally moved away from there. We do not have to deal with this anymore. Big hugs to you for saying that.

 

[Mandy Tad]

I had one more said to me today - " everything happens for a reason". So I am supposed to assume that being bullied and having PTSD happened for a reason?

 

[Springer80]

I had one more said to me today - " everything happens for a reason".

It's the kind of comment you wish you had a large inflatable mallet behind your back for. :devilish:

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I agree. It is a very unkind thing to say to a hurting person. Sorry that happened to you.

 

[Mandy Tad]

No Springer80 I just realized I do not have to tell anyone anything that way I will not feel or hear anyone say anything to me anymore.

 

[Mandy Tad]

Hi All, I heard this quote recently and thought of sharing it with all.

As we know about the future it will be all different
But perhaps what we fear is that it will be the same
But we must celebrate the changes
as someone once said -
everything will be alright in the end, and if it’s not alright, then it is not yet the end.

 

[sunshineontheway]

Hi Sunshine, yes I have had to hear and face all of the above.

Yes, Mandy, it's very upsetting that people with PTSD got very few encouragement and understanding from friends,doctors and people all around, it's a long and rough road of self help, frankly speaking..... I stopped to lay my trust on psychologist doctors in my place, most of them are rubbish, who give you a list of medicine but do not talk with you, every time , they told you to keep optimistic attitude towards life and take to people more, listen to music, etc. All these are not fundamental therapy to PTSD. I guess these doctors do not understand what happen to a PTSD patient, they just pretend to know much and try to be professional and do the test on patient, but exactly, they know less than me...Sorry, I don't mean to despise them, but just telling the truth....:sour:

 

[Mandy Tad]

Hi sunshine, an update, I was advised to seek help from a trauma specialist. I had my first appointment with him yesterday, it was really good. Normal psychologist, doctors do not know how to deal with and treat PTSD. You need to see a PTSD specialist. He kind of said so much about how I am as a person, what I am going through and did not once judge me. He asked me various questions on how I feel, how my family is reacting and it was exactly as he said it. I felt he kind of read me like an open book.The only thing he said to me is the therapy is not going to be easy but it will make me better. He asked me what the other psychologist have been doing and said to stop seeing them. He is writing to my doctor and will advice him on my treatment plan. I really suggest you have yourself checked out by a proper specialist. Look up the internet and check. I was terrified and cried a lot at the therapy as I did not want to talk about the events. So I wrote it all down and he just said let me read it so that I can start helping you. he was kind and did not push me. Bad news though is he does not want me to work which is a bit difficult as I do need the money. All he told me is try but if it does not work you need to walk away. I hope you take the step too and look for a good trauma specialist and get the help you deserve. You can do it.