Poll What Support Do You Have?

[mysihba]

Tlight and TSG, after a long absence from here, I popped in and have to report that I feel about the same way you do. After many years, I really thought that I would be "better" than I am. I really thought that I would get some of my "life" back....wrong again.

 

[Philippa]

I spent many years deliberately not wanting to join support groups or ask for support, as the people around me seemed more wrapped up in their stupid lives than supporting me anyway. All I got was how much they didn't understand me, and had given up trying to.

When I was raped, my mother and brother gave me a hug, and my brother actually said he was sorry that it happened to me, which was a total shock, since he is the sort of person who would run a sweat shop if he could. Nothing but unhelpful comments from my other brother and father though...so no joy there.

I seemed to attract people after that who were too self-abusive to support me in any real way...they needed help themselves and were too busy belittling and emotionally blackmailing me, or trying to, to be of any real use. People are so insecure and they very rarely ever say the right and most helpful thing...have you noticed?

I moved to the city and got nothing but rejection from people who didn't get what was going on for me and thought I was rejecting them because I spent so much time on my own...so they all just rejected me and thought there was something really wrong with me and that i was being manipulative.

Other people I did receive the sense of support and care from...but they ended up stopping all that when it became apparent I wasn't going to have sex with them!:rolleyes:

I have currently two female friends who I can turn to in my town, and speak about lots of things to do with dysfunctional stuff and families etc. I have had a good run with counselors for the most part...one or two that weren't that great but they didn't last anyway...and a really good experience with staff at a shelter I stayed at when I was homeless, which was awesome.

I have a counselor now who is pretty awesome, and the sessions are basically free, as she has offered this while she is still at uni furthering her education in psychology. We had a good rapport fromt he start though, and both agreed we'd like to continue working with each other.

So far it has been good, though I have noticed my avoidance behavior coming up in recent months, and to her credit she has stuck by me when others would have told me they wanted to end sessions.

I have friends I can go to online, one who has ptsd herself, and then of course, this place.

I'm pretty blessed...but I also know what it's like to not have any support. I had that experience for a couple of years after I'd been raped. To anyone who has tried lifeline or those services but not been able to get through, persist with it...they are a really good service, but like everything else, occasionally they have there technical moments where they need to go offline for a bit.

 

[Zef]

My wife. She had to sit with me through a flashback just this morning. Most of my life, it was just me and PTSD. It's amazing the difference one person can make.

 

[^^FlyingSolo^^]

My wife. She had to sit with me through a flashback just this morning. Most of my life, it was just me and PTSD. It's amazing the difference one person can make.

I had to chime in here because I relate so closely to most everything being said in this thread. Specially what you just said Zef about the difference one person can make.

Recently, about 6 months ago I sought out help from CIL (Center for Independent Living) and got lucky and found a great advocate there. We have a standing weekly appointment. He helps me in so many ways! He lets me vent, and talk about recent stuff, listens, he gives advice and he helps me muddle through some of the housing and business things that I need to handle. He also goes with me to my appointments. He's a lifesaver for me! I was on the brink of destruction before I found him. I had absolutely no one. Since I moved here 4 years ago, I was in an HMO and only had 4 Dr's to choose from. I didnt like any of those Dr's. It took a long time but I got my insurance sorted out and found a MD Dr. that I love. That in itself makes a big difference too. Now I have a Dr. I trust and my Advocate who I trust. Its makes a big difference. Our next step is to find a good Therapist. I have never found a good therapist that I liked and trusted. But I had good group therapy sessions in California.

I was out there for many, many, many years with absolutely nobody. So I completely relate to so many of you.

 

[Loveneverfails]

I have my Therapist for support and this forum. It's enough. Sometimes it's hard to be alone, but I muscle through it. Being alone used to floor me, but now it's alright.

 

[Meadowsweet]

My wife. She had to sit with me through a flashback just this morning. Most of my life, it was just me and PTSD. It's amazing the difference one person can make.

I relate to this alot today. The past two days I've been floored with flashbacks. I've laid on the sofa unable to bring myself out and stay out of it for long. But when my son's home from school, I ask him what he's done today etc, and just having someone talking about today is something I find very grounding.

I work once a week, and similarly, being amongst people who have their minds on today keeps me in the here and now.

With a therapist, and certain subjects here are helpful to get to the stuff I need to deal with. But I think having a person who can shut the door and bring my focus back to today would be a help sometimes.

 

[Chincho]

My therapist, this forum which I just found this week, one great friend, and my husband. The problem is my husband is in the merchant navy and spends months away from home.

 

[mysihba]

Sorry about the previous post ; I try to avoid posting unless it's positive, neutral or helpful..

Flying Solo, are you getting that kind of help from CIL in the states ?? Didn't think they offered that kind of help, at least in OR.

 

[Britt.f7]

I answered my partner. I do have a therapist who tries to help. I have two friends that are willing to be there for me if I let them. Haven't talked to them much when I fell back into deep depression and anxiety this year, but, from time to time, they remind me that they are there. I feel like a horrible friend, especially this last year. Some of my family say they are here for me, but I do not feel comfortable. I always feel, if I share with them, that one day the floor will drop out under me.

I do have my pets. Do they count? :)

 

[raven123]

Honestly, my other (she's awesome but limited to what we know) and online. That's it. :( I can't afford a shrink.

 

[Pencil]

Thank heavens for the new T - the only support. I have friends who are supportive in other ways, but no-one knows about the 'real' stuff inside. PTSD is extremely alienating and isolating.

 

[Chrissyy]

I'm supported by a close friend. Right now I don't have much of a support system because of where I am, but back at home I would be supported by a close friend and a psychologist. I don't really tell my friend that much to be honest, but I could if I chose to and she's good just for company and chatting when I feel down.