How To Stop Recalling Memory/dream?

[matrix]

As you guys probably read, I had my first "nightmare" experience a few nights ago. But I have a problem.

My first bad dream/nightmare was a few days ago, and the memory of the dream/nightmare no longer bothers me or scares me, but the problem is, I thought about the dream so much in the last 48 hours, that I think my brain has now made it a habit to recall the dream.

Whenever I'm doing something that distracts me, I don't think about the dream. But as soon as I am alone with my thoughts, my brain starts re-calling it and reminding me of the dream. I feel like, with memories, they often fade by themselves, and then you no longer recall them anymore because they aren't important to you, but this particular memory/dream, I feel like I'm trying to suppress it, more than I am trying to forget it.

Any idea how I can stop this newly-formed habit of recalling this dream and reminding myself of it? It was my first nightmare, like I said. It doesn't scare me to think about it anymore, or bother me. But I keep recalling the dream in my head as a habit and reminding myself of it. Any idea how can I move on and stop obsessively/compulsively bringing it up in my memory?

Basically I had this "nightmare" about 3 nights ago. And over these last 3 days, I find myself waking up, and immediately reminding myself of the dream. Like upon waking up, my brain goes, "hey remember this dream?" and then I have to push the memory to the back of my mind to try and avoid thinking about it. But I just want the memory to fade. I just want to stop giving it attention. Why am I so strung up on it? I don't care about it anymore. The dream happened.

It's over. It ended. It holds no significance to me. It's not important, and I don't fear it any longer. Yet, I've thought about it so much and I keep recalling it that I feel like I can't think normally anymore. What if I did like, some serious brain-damage to my mind or something? I feel that's a bit absurd to say, but I'm just wishing that I never had this dream in the first place. Now I can't forget the damn memory and move on from it. I want to feel like myself again. I just want to wake up and carry on with my day, and not have to bring this dream up time and time again. It's just unnecessary. I'm just stressing myself out by doing this. How do I just let go and stop caring? I just need to reminding myself of it.

 

[ms spock]

Distract yourself - reading, drawing, watching tv, exercising, dancing, seeing friends, walking.

 

[matrix]

Distract yourself

I do. Whenever I'm focused on doing something, I'm not thinking about it. As soon as I let go of my concentration, my mind begins to wander again and starts recalling the memory of the dream. Like I don't know if I'm recalling the dream on purpose, or if my brain is reminding me of it. I just don't know what's going on. This is bizarre.

 

[ms spock]

Well keep on distracting and redirecting yourself matrix. Keep doing things as much as you can.

 

[matrix]

Well keep on distracting and redirecting yourself matrix. Keep doing things as much as you can.

Sigh. Thanks. I am trying. I just, never heard of something like this happening before. Recalling a memory forcefully and always having it linger on your mind. It's just annoying. I feel like I'm forcing myself to bring it up in my head. Rather than just moving on and saying "I don't care anymore," I am just going in circles.

I hope I haven't done any permanent damage or something. Maybe I've just been overthinking it so much that now I accidentally made it a habit and I keep bringing it up, but it gives me no benefit. So why am I bringing it up at all?

See, I keep trying to rationalize it. Bringing up the memory of the dream doesn't benefit me in any way. Yet, why do I keep recalling it? What am I trying to gain? Nothing, but it's like just a bad habit. That's the only way I can explain it.

 

[zaniara]

I have been doing like that before, a lot. Had memories trying to surface somehow, but I really didn't want to look at them or handle them in anyway at all. So I ran. For years. But they did not go away. Sometimes our brain tries to help us in ways we don't like. And sometimes anxiety is a good thing: since it's a feeling that's there to tell us something is wrong. (Like the pain you feel when a bone is broken. - It's there to make you react and ask for help.) Do you have somebody professional you can talk to?

 

[ms spock]

Sigh.. Thanks.. I am trying.

Ease up on yourself. Don't give yourself a hard time.

If you focus on thinking about something you will think about it, like wise if you think about and focus on not thinking about something you will think about it as well.

The more you focus on something - to think or not to think - you will think about it.

Just be compassionate with yourself.

 

[ms spock]

Maybe I've just been overthinking it so much that now I accidentally made it a habit and I keep bringing it up

I have a tendency to over think things. So be kind to yourself. Do losts of things to distract yourself. If you can't stop thinking about it then don't judge yourself for it.

 

[matrix]

I have been doing like that before, a lot. Had memories trying to surface somehow, but I really didn't want to look at them or handle them in anyway at all. So I ran. For years. But they did not go away. Sometimes our brain tries to help us in ways we don't like. And sometimes anxiety is a good thing: since it's a feeling that's there to tell us something is wrong. (Like the pain you feel when a bone is broken. - It's there to make you react and ask for help.) Do you have somebody professional you can talk to?

Well, it's not that I don't want to handle this memory. It's just that it's not important to me any longer and thinking about it has become a waste of time. I don't want this memory to "go away". I just want to "move on" from it, because it's taking up the space in my mind and it's keeping me from thinking about more important matters. I just don't know why I'm recalling it so much. It holds no significance. It's not a memory I fear, or am trying to escape from. It's just becoming bothersome to bring it up at all. Yet for some reason I keep reminding myself of it. It's just more irritating than anything. I already spoke to a somewhat professional and she said these things fade with time, but it's just irritating.

I want to understand why this is happening and why my brain is recalling it. Perhaps I'm forcing myself to think about. Rather than letting go. You know when you hold onto something so much in life, it sticks with you, but when you let go, it drifts away and you forget and it no longer remains on your mind. This isn't something I would usually ever have a problem with, or need to over-think. It's just, experiencing a nightmare is a first for me, and maybe this is the "after effects" of the "shock" from the dream. I hope that within a few weeks I will be back to normal, thinking like normal and not bringing this memory up anymore. Because it's just interfering with my thinking and my ability to maintain concentration. It's just consuming too much of my thoughts. I don't know why I keep reminding myself of it.

 

[matrix]

I have a tendency to over think things. So be kind to yourself. Do losts of things to distract yourself. If you can't stop thinking about it then don't judge yourself for it.

I hear you. I'm not necessarily judging myself for it, so to speak, I'm just trying to determine what's causing me to have this type of reaction, and how I can remedy the problem. I just want to know if this is something that occurs naturally to people. When I'm relaxed, and doing something and I'm focused, I'm not thinking about this stupid memory/dream, but when I lose my concentration, my mind begins to wander and it comes back to the dream. It's been about 3 days since the dream so perhaps I'm still experiencing the after-effects of it and I'm still trying to move on from it and accept it happened. But yeah. I hope this is just a somewhat normal reaction and that I'll be fine after a while.

 

[zaniara]

EMDR might help? I've had some EMDR; and when we worked with one thing for some time(not more than two sessions up till now; for each memory) it goes totally uninteresting to think about somehow. It's really strange. - But I guess you want something you can do on your own. But I've got nothing to add to the good advices you have already got. Good luck! :)

 

[matrix]

EMDR might help? I've had some EMDR; and when we worked with one thing for some time(not more than two sessions up till now; for each memory) it goes totally uninteresting to think about somehow. It's really strange. - But I guess you want something you can do on your own. But I've got nothing to add to the good advices you have already got. Good luck! :)

I was thinking about doing EMDR to help with my Depersonalization. I'm not sure if you've heard of it, but let's say in the future if I still struggle with this, would EMDR actually help with ridding myself of the memory? How does it work? thanks!