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Horrible Phone Call At Work

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WillowMarie

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I work retail and had this customer call tonight that was a young boy. Probably junior high or high school maybe. It was the most horrible phone call I ever experienced... I am hoping it was some kind of sick joke... Please let it be.. Even though it makes me sick to think that someone would ever joke like that...

When the young boy was talking to me, I could hear what sounded like a man, he said it was his dad, screaming at him. The boy wanted to know if we had this certain game in stock and I asked him if it was for certain system or anything, and he was trying to ask his dad for what system. Even before this though, I could hear his dad yelling.

The boy kept apologizing saying, I'm sorry (for his dad's yelling). I told him, don't worry about it, that it reminded me of my dad, that my dad yelled like that. The boy said, yea, he gets really angry... especially when he drinks alchohol. I told him, I am very sorry.

He sounded almost too calm about it, and I couldn't tell if he was trying not to laugh a couple of times, or maybe crying, but it was hard to tell. It really would have been too perfect of a joke. Maybe I want to be in denial that it could have been real. It sounded real when I could hear his dad screaming, who are you on the phone with?? And he yelled back, a friend, just a friend. I was scared his dad was going to come by and rip the phone out of his hands so he could scream at me and ask who I am.

I guess the point that I really questioned it was near the end when he said that his dad was overly mad at him today because of a grade. He said a 92% and almost sounded like he giggled, but maybe it was a stifled cry. I told him that doesn't sound bad! If I wasn't so worked up, I might have been able to be clear headed enough to tell him he did a darn great job and I would be proud of him!

It was horrible during this phone conversation. My hear was racing and I started trembling. I was really really scared for me and for this boy, I was terrified that at any second his dad would come and hurt him or something and I'd be able to hear it. I had wanted to tell him to talk to someone at school, like a counselor, but it never came out of my mouth. I wanted to tell him that he didn't deserve his dad's anger and it wasn't something he did. I wanted to tell him he can reach out and find people who would care and help him. I wanted to tell him he wasn't alone.

After the call ended, I was feeling emotional and worked up. I was dissociated and still panicky. I felt like I just wanted to curl up somewhere and cry. And it was so weird, a little after the phone call, I started to freak out because I got this strange feeling I was going to get in trouble. I don't know why. I kept reminding myself I didn't do anything wrong to calm myself down.

And now I just tried to lay down to bed, but I started to have emotions come back from the phone call and am thinking about it. I am feeling panicky again and want to cry. I am feeling anxious and scared. I am feeling other emotions, but I just don't know what to call it.

It was just horrible.
 
Oh, I am so sorry. I hope you take really gentle care of yourself, maybe wrap up, have some nice hot tea, or whatever you find most comforting. You did well on the call, and if he needs help, he's likely to find it from many avenues. Teenagers are resourceful people, as are you for reaching out here.
 
It truly could have been just a prank. Let's hope so. I work 3rd shift retail 10-7. We get LOTS of prank calls. I do not have ptsd but I find some of these calls very upsetting. It is hard sometimes to tell if it is a prank or not. The obscene calls are better than the disturbing ones.
 
How awful. I'm so sorry. It sounds like it triggered you. It would have triggered me because I grew up with a drunk dad. I probably would have gone into a half freeze and dissociated.

You know what I think is beautiful. You told him your dad drank too. Just knowing it happened to someone else who made it to a grown up would have helped me if I were that kid. I often laughed when I should have cried when I was little. That's a common reaction. There is a term for that I can't remember.

I think you did great, and now need to take care of you. Do anything you can to create a sense of comfort and safety.
 
Prank or not, your reaction was real and just. Congratulate yourself for handling a tough spot with impressive grace. Please be extra gentle an kind with yourself. I treat aftermaths like this as the flu. Eat well, plenty of fluids and rest.

Just breathe.
 
The only thing would add to what everyone else has said is to cry if you need to. Feel whatever other emotions that come up as well. Feelings are natural and holding them in only makes things worse! Take deep breaths and be gentle with yourself; you did great! :)

Gentle hugs if you want them!
 
I've had something similar to this when I was in retail. It puts you in a really tough situation, especially with PTSD. I'm glad you were able to take care of yourself afterwards.
 
Thank you for all the support everyone, it means a lot to me.
and if he needs help, he's likely to find it from many avenues. Teenagers are resourceful people

Thank you for the comfort on this, I will remind myself this when I start thinking about the boy.

You know what I think is beautiful. You told him your dad drank too. Just knowing it happened to someone else who made it to a grown up would have helped me if I were that kid. I often laughed when I should have cried when I was little. That's a common reaction

I would never want someone to feel alone if they were going through that. My dad didn't drink though, at least that I can remember of. He just yelled a lot/got angry a lot at mainly little things. But I have had a lot of therapists slipped up saying, my alcoholic dad, or when my dad drank, and I'm just like, no.... I never said my dad was an alcoholic... I guess because of how his temper was they confuse it. But yea, I do feel good about letting him know I had a dad who screamed like that and that what I was hearing reminded me of my dad a lot. I hope he feels less alone or comforted by that.

I was also thinking along the same with what you mentioned, if he was indeed laughing and it was real, that it could be a coping skill type of thing, or a "normal" reaction to what he went through. I guess I was kind of hoping it would mean it was laughing because it was a joke.

The only thing would add to what everyone else has said is to cry if you need to. Feel whatever other emotions that come up as well. Feelings are natural and holding them in only makes things worse!

Thank you for the reminder. I am excellent at distracting and pushing away things. I need to remind myself this and be okay with feeling what was coming up. And remind myself that I will survive letting myself feel what comes up.
 
It truly could have been just a prank. Let's hope so. I work 3rd shift retail 10-7. We get LOTS of prank calls. I do not have ptsd but I find some of these calls very upsetting. It is hard sometimes to tell if it is a prank or not. The obscene calls are better than the disturbing ones.
I also work part-time, third shift for a retail call center (but am able to work from home). I hate the calls that you're pretty sure are a prank but it's more of a gut feeling than anything specific they've said and you have to go through the motions with the call until they've said something that clearly shows it is a prank (we have a specific line that we transfer offensive calls to; our company monitors it and if it becomes a repeated problem they'll block that phone number from coming through to sales reps). We do get the occasional vulgar, perverted sales call and I can't transfer them away fast enough. I feel shaky and sick to my stomach afterwards.

My customers are predominantly women. I have had calls from ladies who were whispering to place an order while their husband was in the background yelling. I've even had a customer who was whispering and said she was hiding in the closet and needed to place the order quickly before her husband found out. I feel bad for these ladies but there's nothing I can really do but help them place their order as quickly as possible.
 
You know, one of my strangest reactions to reality is what you described - this fear I'm about to witness something horrifying. I almost can't video call with my family or watch YouTube vlogs. I talk to generally decent people all the time on the help desk calls I handle for my job. You were really great to get through that and connect with the kid on the other end of the phone.
 
No I'm sure it was for real. I know what kids go through, I was a kid once. It's messed up to take a person that has to rely on a parent to live and kids don't even know what the hell to believe. I listened to my father yell . God ---------- . Maddy get your ass up and go pee. She was three. Now tell me something. How the hell does he know when she has to pee. And why yell she is a beautiful little girl. And why not let me put her in her own room? I just believed she needed her space. I would have washed her blankets but oh no he would not have that. He was trying to put me in but house.
 
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