How To Survive Riding In A Car?

[JEKBreatheandBelieve]

I absolutely hate riding in the car. I get really anxious and I have to focus only on the road and keeping myself calm. However, I have two young boys (2 and 5), so that isn't possible. We are taking a 10 hour car trip split up over 2 days and then doing it again after a 3 day break. Any suggestions on how to survive the car ride is appreciated- ideas for keeping the kids calm and myself calm.

 

[Friday]

Do it while they're mostly asleep.

I do this with small children to make good time.

- Morning: Sleep in. Breakfast. Swim in hotel pool. Goof off & play hard.
- Leave : Lunchtime. Either right before eating or right after. Point: After a physically active morning and full bellies? They pass out.
- Stop : When they wake up. Rest stop or fast food playground. Pee. Run around. Snack. Stay about 30-60 min or until they're runned out & need a break. Pee before leaving.
- Stop / "Dinner" often only about 4pm: About an hour later (Pee). At a McDonalds or similar with play place. Stay 1-2 hours. Right before leaving, scrub up & change into PJs.
- If they conk right out (probably) drive until you get to the hotel.

Lather rinse repeat.

I usually get a good 7+ hours after the "dinner" & PJs stop, then check in and get my normal sleep before the kids are up in the morning. But if you're doing 5 hours a day, 2 in the afternoon during naps, and 3 after "bedtime" (if your 5yo tells time, change your car clock) should give you peace & quiet.

 

[digger]

By 'riding' do you mean as a passenger, or does that mean you are the one driving?

 

[JEKBreatheandBelieve]

@FridayJones - my oldest doesn't sleep much in the car any more and I don't think I could handle traveling at night. We're also not staying at any hotels, but will hang out and play at the house we're staying at.

@digger - I will be a passenger. Although I like to be in control and be the driver, I get too anxious on long trips to be the driver.

 

[Friday]

Not arguing... People work out all kinds of different ways to do things, the above is just mine!

However, you may be surprised to find out how fast kids pass out during car rides lasting over an hour if you haven't done that in awhile. Even if you don't wear them out in the morning, then stick them in the comfy rocking swing of the car. Even older kids at 10-15 can usually be counted on to crash for several hours, but they're easy to ride with / don't need to stop every hour even when awake! :D

"Dinner" the way we do it for kids on the road is around 3 or 4pm. (At home it's 7 or 8pm for dinner. They never notice the difference. Riding in a car is exhausting, and they're used to eating, jammas, and bed. So it pavlovs them to bump thing early for a few days). Head smack! I forget how global is forum is. Up here it doesn't get dark until 9pm or 10pm right now. Later if we're heading up into Canada. If it's winter where you're at and getting dark at 4 early dinner trix won't helps at all. Whoops.

 

[digger]

Do you have one of those portable DVD players for the kids? They can be a life saver on long trips! Headphones for you maybe. Most small kids will end up sleeping on long trips whatever time of day you travel. What sort of things do you usually do on trips?[DOUBLEPOST=1403367726,1403367578][/DOUBLEPOST]Link Removed :) being distracted in keeping them distracted might help with some of your anxiety maybe?

 

[JEKBreatheandBelieve]

@digger - we are borrowing a portable DVD thing that has two screens. We're testing it out today to make sure it works and we know how to work it. When my oldest was 2 he cried for almost the entire trip during one leg of this journey. We sometimes play the alphabet game, listen to books or music CDs, they look at/read books. Things have changed though since I was in a car accident and I can't entertain as well as I used to. I am trying to be as prepared as I can with as many options as I can. I am super anxious because I get overwhelmed on 45 minute long trips let alone hours long and if I get overwhelmed and my older son gets bored or my younger son gets upset, I am likely to snap into anger mode and that's not good for anyone. I can't exactly run and hide when I am triggered when in the car so I'm trying to plan as many activities as I can.

@FridayJones - Thanks for sharing your strategies. It's helpful to know what other people do and is exactly what I am looking for even if some of it doesn't work for me.

 

[digger]

Are you able to schedule in lots of pits stops along the way. I find if I'm anxious I tend to tense up physically. Being confined to sitting in one position won't help that. I'm thinking regular short stops where you can literally get out of the car and shake some of it off and reframe? I don't know if that would work for you? I think for me breaking the journey into smaller chunks like that might help.

 

[cherryblossom]

We are taking a 10 hour car trip split up over 2 days

In reality, that's actually not a lot of driving time. It's only 5 hours each day. If you consider the average adult is awake for 16 hours per day, by my reckoning you could drive for half an hour, and stop for an hour, drive for half an hour, stop for an hour, etc and still get 5 hours driving done before bed time. And of course this could be adjusted, as suits. For example if the kids are asleep, drive for longer. Or make adjustments whereby sometimes, you only stop for 20-30 mins, if you don't want to drive in the dark.

I don't have children, but I would imagine if you got them up early (before they would normally get up), and literally set off straight away (just move them from bed to car), there is a very could chance with the gentle rocking motion of the car, that they could fall back to sleep for an hour or so at least, meaning you get a good distance travelled, while the roads are quiet, which might help your anxiety too, and will take the 'time pressure' off for the rest of the day. Honestly, I don't think travelling for 5 hours in one day is as daunting as you think it is, when you consider how many hours there are in a day. Good luck :)

 

[JEKBreatheandBelieve]

@cherryblossom - I used to think 5 hours was no big deal, but just getting in a car is a huge deal for me these days.

@digger - If I can convince my husband about little stops, I think that is a very good idea. And usually if it means I am calmer, he is willing to make it work.

 

[cherryblossom]

just getting in a car is a huge deal for me these days.

Which is why I suggested breaking it into 30 minute drives, with plenty of long stops in between. I'm not dismissing your anxiety. It was just a suggestion that might help.

 

[Hope4Now]

Aside from all the other good suggestions, try this. It saved me on a 10 hour train ride with my then 3 year old and I used it for a few long trips. Buy some little toy things and wrap them like presents...then give them to the kids at key moments on the ride.
I also found that (if you can handle it) cramming myself in between the car seats in the back for a while between pit stops helped...then I could read to them or play goofy hand games.[DOUBLEPOST=1403400838,1403400672][/DOUBLEPOST]Oh...and for keeping you calm...that's harder. Travel with children is brutal. Breathing exercises are key. I also found that singing with them helped me as much as entertained them. Raffi was indispensable. Crazy-making at any other time but a lifesaver in the car.