Someone Called Me "i Am Good For Nothing And Of No Use"!!!

[Tanishq]

@J_trustno1 So glad you stopped swearing. See? You did it. :tup:

Good luck on working with therapist.

 

[J_trustno1]

@Tanishq : wow! that is brilliant. I have also done that writing for 10 mins when i was very angry at my mum's brother and what he had done to me. I was swearing at him so much while i was writing it down. Then I stabbed that paper with pen 100 times and then burned the paper and then stood on the ashes :P. As a result, i was laughing at his loss in the end :D :D

 

[Tanishq]

I stabbed that paper with pen 100 times

Jess, I think gently burning the paper is good enough to let go. You really have lot of anger in you.

 

[J_trustno1]

@Tanishq : Yes, a lot. Anything or anyone that reminds me of my mum's brother or similar comments he gave me, does really really frustrate me. I have so much anger for this man!

 

[Nicolette]

I have so much anger for this man!

You can look at this in a number of ways but one is, which I believe to be true, is that this anger and holding on to it consumes you and your energy, leaving you stuck in an unpleasant place. Sadly this man may feel guilty and remorse or he may be a poor excuse of a human being and have no conscious. Either way, your anger only keeps you stuck and does nothing to him. Having anger for a period in time is normal and healthy... it would be good for you if you could move forward into the next stage of healing and find acceptance/peace with what is now done and can never be changed. The longer you stay angry at this man, I believe the longer he still has power over you. Don't let it consume you and your life - you deserve to be free of it.

Good luck in finding your way out of the anger so that you can see others and life more clearly and without such a burden :)

 

[Tanishq]

Having anger for a period in time is normal and healthy... it would be good for you if you could move forward into the next stage of healing and find acceptance/peace with what is now done and can never be changed.

I like how you put it. I envisaged it in my mind and it's beautiful to be free from anger. :)

 

[digger]

This guy was saying these things to you based on his experiences of the culture he is living in. You can see that it was skewed because it was based only on that and he had no right projecting that onto you as well, yes? He and his daughter have clearly had some bad experience trying to find work and build the lives they want for themselves, and it is his belief that that is because of his race/skin colour/culture. That didn't give him the right to project that onto you as well and I understand your anger over that.

By that same token though, you are condemning an entire race and culture, including yourself(?) because of your experiences with a small number of people from that race and culture? Why is what you're doing okay, and what he was doing not okay? You are both massively generalising about people and race based on your own experiences.

I am sorry for what you went through at the hands of your family, but it was at the hands of your family, not at the hands of all Indians. You are Indian yourself yes? Do you think that you are the only one who has a different way of thinking?

It reminds me a bit of what you did with the cat. One cat bit you, so ALL cats were bad....

@Tanishq has been patiently helping you throughout this thread. Are you acknowledging the flag on his profile?

 

[digger]

,I see that the Front National has won in France, as well as UKIP in Britain.…/…… In the states, there is a feeling that some countries in Europe are quietly developing unrest with multiculturalism and Islam in particular - perhaps we are mistaken.

Apologies if this takes things off topic too much, I'll keep it short. @Dana1010 - while it's true that UKIP have some seats on European parliament, they don't actually have a seat in UK government. Most people I know would put them in the same category as 'distasteful jokes'. I live in the north of England in an area that is very richly multicultural and personally it's one of the things I like best about where I live. Please don't read too much into media hype. We're not all like that, honest :)

 

[J_trustno1]

@digger : I know that Tanishq is a very generous and sweet person. He is different from the ones I have met and it is very difficult to meet other Indians like him. I have nothing against him and I doubt I ever will. I am not attacking him.

 

[digger]

I wasn't suggesting you were attacking him. I was suggesting you look at that and at the millions of Indians you haven't met and maybe see that as many of them could be like him as you are presuming are like your family.

 

[J_trustno1]

@Nicolette @Ayesha and @joeylittle : Can you ladies please sort out Solara? I have had enough of her rubbish and trying to attack me! I have even put her on ignore so that we don't argue but she always jumps in to my threads to get attention. Can you please tell her NOT post on my threads? If she has issues within herself then it's best she sorts them here on her threads or visit a psychologist other than trying to pick fights with not only me but every other member on the forum?

Thank you for reading this!

 

[joeylittle]

@J_trustno1, Solara hasn't broken any rules by posting here. She is allowed to post where she would like, and her content does not qualify as attacking. You have made the choice to use the ignore function, which I think is wise.

It is incumbent on you to continue to ignore any opinions or statements that you do not like or are uncomfortable with. If rules are broken, we will take action. Until then, the choice is yours whether to get upset or to ignore and move on. I really respectfully suggest that you ignore and move on.

This is the last post in this thread on this subject. Thank you.