Never giving up, can anyone relate?

FMCA said:

@KA60 , I feel like I was taken advantage of last week by someone who had put their own boundary in place last year not to talk to me, which is fine. But then let me over the course of a couple of days disclose more information about myself to show why I wasn’t well and I was getting more frustrated. It then dawned on me and I asked if she did not want to be my friend then why was she reading all about me , that it did not make sense. I was upset I’d been nasty because I was getting frustrated when actually, it was an invasion of privacy. She violated her own boundary to read about me. Caused a lot of emotional harm.

I suppose not giving up can lead to situations where it causes emotional harm in more ways than I had realized.

My new mantra is changed from I never give up to I only give up when it harms me or starts hurting other people.

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Freemartin said:

Not giving up is so glorified in our western societies. As if it was a good idea in any given situation. Or a sign of strength of character. Or as if the Universe somehow rewarded people for trying and trying and trying and not adapting to reality.

If you refuse to give up, you can have your basic assumptions and beliefs intact. Someday I’ll perform like a person who hasn’t been traumatized for life. Someday my parents will love me. Someday I can make what’s done undone.

Giving up can open doors to a healthier mindset. And it can be a result of the mindset getting healthier. It’s painful as f*ck to admit that my dream can never come true because I never had the same opportunities (mental healt, for example). But I can stop flagellating myself for being a loser.

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FMCA said:

@KA60 , I feel like I was taken advantage of last week by someone who had put their own boundary in place last year not to talk to me, which is fine. But then let me over the course of a couple of days disclose more information about myself to show why I wasn’t well and I was getting more frustrated. It then dawned on me and I asked if she did not want to be my friend then why was she reading all about me , that it did not make sense. I was upset I’d been nasty because I was getting frustrated when actually, it was an invasion of privacy. She violated her own boundary to read about me. Caused a lot of emotional harm.

I suppose not giving up can lead to situations where it causes emotional harm in more ways than I had realized.

My new mantra is changed from I never give up to I only give up when it harms me or starts hurting other people.

Click to expand...

FMCA said:

KA60, you shouldn’t blame yourself. Now you know what red flags to watch out for and you watch out for them, just treat it is a learning experience.

I’ve come to the conclusion that All we can do in life is learn and that learning means progress. Even if it means like me you end up doing nothing because I’ve learned I need a rest x

But I’d has taken 43 years to work that one out x

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