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I am going out to eat with my family at a restaurant. Generally I oppose that sort of thing, because I think nobody should have to work on a holiday. But it will make it easier to deal with the PTSD triggers, so I am all for it. Afterwards I plan to come home and have a large glass of wine. And...

PH, a plan is a good idea! I usually write down what I will do, too. This year my therapist wrote down some coping mantras for me, too. It stinks that the holidays are hard for us, but we can be proud that we are finding ways to cope and taking care of ourselves despite the stress.

Yes, I also like the "we're not close" answer. It helps me to remember that just because others ask a question, I am not obligated to answer it. I have a right to keep my private life private (and I will do so until the other person proves themselves trustworthy). Still, it's hard to remember...

I keep a journal to help me keep track of things between sessions. I jot notes of whatever I can remember immediately following each session. The night before my next session, I review what happened in the last session and write down two or three things that are important for me to bring up the...

Auburngirl, that's beautiful. What a lovely way to take care of yourself.

Here are two articles that might be useful to you: Dissociation Explained and What is Dissociation It's a phenomena that can be different for each person. I've heard it describe so many ways--going away, disappearing, freezing, flying away, floating, spacing out, checking out, turning inside...

Auburngirl, I am so glad to read of how well things are going for you. It's a testimony to the hard work you have put into healing. Your perspective on things is positive and self-...uplifting? it's a made-up word, but you do sound like you are taking wonderful steps. Good for you!

I have been through a couple of rounds of prolonged exposure. I won't lie, it was tough. Really hard. And really, really worth it. Some of my reexperiencing and hypervigilance symptoms have almost completely disappeared. I used to sit, every night, for an hour or more, listening, terrified that...

I particularly love Jon G. Allen's "Coping with Trauma: Hope Through Understanding." Chief among his suggestions for healing is mentalizing, responding to your thoughts and feelings with compassion. My copy is tattered from repeated readings.

Everyone has their own path to healing. If what you are doing is working for you, then keep at it.

I am on two, a SSRI and Trazodone. I think the SSRI has been essentially useless and I'm going off it now after several years, with my psychiatrist's approval. I crack up every time I do a med check, because he asks me if I've been depressed. Finally I told him, "I haven't been depressed since I...

Ayesha, your first post--I can completely see how angry you are. You feel so unheard, like everyone is missing what you are screaming inside, so why speak at all. I am in that place often myself. Can you e-mail your T that? Learning to talk about things is hard and will come in fits and starts...

I know this feeling. Sometimes I don't realize how harrowing a session is until I've left it, and then it's frustrating and sad because there's no one to help me cope with the fallout of everything that got brought up. It helps me, in a small way, to turn around and go in the next session and...

Great idea to reconstruct the shards into art!

It was really brave of you to tell! Good for you. I'm sorry her first reaction was to call you a liar. That's painful. Maybe as she adjusts she will be able to come out of her denial to face the tragedy of what happened to you. She is probably spending a lot of energy avoiding the reality of...

I have had a hard time looking at my therapist from the beginning. It's fear and shame. I can look now, I look and look away and look back and look away. But it's so much easier to feel cared about and connected when I look. It's taken years and I'm beginning to understand that he's not judging...

I understand being scared about the diagnosis. It's good you are checking with the psychiatrist, too. The best thing about this, though, might be that your treatment plan can be changed and you will feel better overall. Getting a diagnosis is nothing more than naming a set of symptoms so that...

While I don't have advice for telling someone in a romantic relationship, I did tell a couple of very close friends. I waited until I had signs we were in a close friendship (they revealed things they didn't tell most people, for example). When I felt safe enough, and when I realized that that...

Oh, yes, this is exactly it, Sethe. Part why trauma stays with us is because it is stuck. When we work through it, and resolve it, its effect on us is diminished. This has been easier for me to understand when it comes to the fear and the horror, but it's just as true for the anger. Nora, I...

I am glad you found a psychologist who seems like a good fit. Hope is a wonderful thing.

I think my therapist had to actually train me to handle his compassion. When I first started talking about my trauma he would talk about the 'little girl in me' and I would roll my eyes and call it BS. He would, kindly, drop it, but he persisted in expressing his sadness about what happened to...

I was abused by a large man (tall and wide) and I am often completely panicked by big men. My therapist is a tall, thin man who is very...placid, soothing, innocuous. It has taken me YEARS to figure this out. But I am so glad that I took the chance of seeing someone who could be scary to me...

I don't think what you did was stupid. It sounds to me like you are trying desperately to regain a sense of mastery over the trauma. You say, "I don’t want to hurt anyone but I want to fight back." What you want is natural, and in fact it's a part of the healing process. The thing is, as you...

I think any time you put your hopes on "things being better," you are setting yourself up for disappointment, because with PTSD the key is doing things just slightly differently. It takes a loooong time for things to be better or different. Change is often miniscule. I've been trying to do the...

The numbness is so painful, I know. I think it's really good that you are pushing yourself to go out nonetheless. Staying in the world and making contact with people is a good thing. I hope tomorrow is better for you.