Any input from sufferers on isolation?

[Abstract]

I deserve to be treated w/ more respect

You certainly do and I don't believe it does anyone any good if you accept a situation that harms you. For obvious reasons and in addition the relationship always ends up toxic for both as a result in my opinion.

I hope he is able to open up and that you can find a way of both of your needs and feelings being cared for. If that happens then think of the clearest words to express what you need and cant do without.

I am sorry that you are hurting. Maybe do something nice for yourself. Take care.

 

[Iamhere]

his level of respect and his actions show a completely different story. I deserve to be treated w/ more respect. At this point...I'll wait, but I can't reach out.

I understand, its hard but don't forget to take care of the most important person in the world and that's YOURSELF. We give and give and put our needs, wants, emotions, anything and everything for them, but we have to remember that we are no use to them or ourselves if we are down as well.

Good luck on your journey. Feel free to reach out.

 

[Meadowsweet]

I've just isolated myself from a friend. She wants to help, but her advice goes against what I've done in therapy and I feel there's a danger of undoing the therapeutic work I've done. So I'm taking responsibility for my recovery by removing myself and going over the things I've learned in therapy.

I've been courteous and polite and written an email that begins "I know you mean well...", and given a brief explanation that avoids any criticism of her help.

I accept that it is my mind that's broken, and I have no expectations of her to know whats going on inside my mind or to fix it. So although I need to take some time out from her, I don't feel or think anything negative about her.

However, despite my best efforts to reassure her, it may still be that she feels it's insulting or ungrateful of me to decline her help. She may feel rejected and she may take it personally and blame me for her feelings. Or, she may try to fix things even more, and that puts me in a position to have to go back into a situation that is damaging, or to have to reject her help again, which makes me the double bad guy.

What i need, is for her to accept that she's not responsible for fixing me, and to let me take that responsibility. I need her to trust that my courtesy is out of respect for her feelings. And I need her to respect my right to decline her help.

 

[MnchkinAz]

Thank you all Again!! I appreciate the kind words and the support. Meadowsweet, thank you for the perspective, I understand where you're coming from. I'm a little different I think in that, i've never offered advice, only support. I would never to assume to understand what he needs are. I only hope he will continue to get professional help and live a full life. I believe he will. He's motivated to learn hoe to manage his PTSD. On my end, I will take care of myself, and manage my heartache, it's not the first :)

Thank you all again for your support. It is so appreciated.

Have a great day all.

 

[desperatewife]

Hello Everyone! Quick update.. My ex husband still wants the divorce, we are going through the process. He still with his "new girlfriend" but I've been dealing with my girls and new life fine. I've been going to church & God is helping heal from this fatal nightmare. I hope and wish the best for him. About a month ago he told md his feelings "didnt matter" not sure exactly what he meant, not sure what's going through his head. A few days after that he reminded me again that he doesn't have feelings for me & basically made it clear to me to leave him alone because he will never come back. He seems happy now so that's all that matters, I guess. I am trying my best to stay healthy and stress free for my twins ! Hope everyone is doing better!