Approach-avoidance

[Chava]

There are levels of freeze, not to get way off topic here, but the term "fold" was new to me too. But think of a baby bunny. A dog is near by. It freezes. This is an adaptive and protective response. When all is clear, it darts away...all that flight energy is ready to go. If the dog grabs it with its teeth, it freezes and goes limp (I've seen this). Looks dead, but it's not, and could still run off if let go. This is a deeper freeze. In the trapped and helpless state, the little body is flooded with chemicals that allow it to die with less pain. I wish I could cite this, but trust me this is real. So animals do it too. They just do it more naturally in real threat, where we can totally fold with tiny triggers after having been in the real trauma. That aspect would be incredibly maladaptive for surviving in the wild and its weird to me that we hang onto that as humans...the trigger stuff. I've seen traumatized shelter animals. They do respond differently to minor or even non-threats.

So I assume the major difference in all of this is the captivity aspect...child abuse or being a captured animal. In the wild they do get to flee.

 

[sun seeker]

But I'm interested in what others have to add...how strongly you recognize this in yourself

Very.

I agree with your interpretation of how this conflict is learned. I also do somatic therapy and my responses make it obvious that this is something I learned in infancy.

how therapy has or is helping you with some of this

It's helping. It takes lots of repetition, but I do see it translating into willingness to reach out for other kinds of help (making a phone call in crisis, let's say).

 

[oasis2003]

Yes I definitely fold and freeze

 

[oasis2003]

I def have this approach avoid response. My therapist even said it too. It happens when you are tiny hence implicit memories. I also get lots of body / somatic experiencing. Does any one know how to heal implicit memories?

 

[Chava]

Does any one know how to heal implicit memories?

Body psychotherapy methods work this way (like Somatic Experiencing). You have to create the space to get out of your cognitive mind. You can't "think" about it, and yet you need a sort of duel awareness...seeing or feeling the old pattern and being able to observe it from a present and more embodied place...and then change the response. Earliest memories are implicit, but trauma memories from any age (criterion A) are also stored in a procedural-brain-stem way (emergency response)...why you can "know" better but react horribly in some triggery circumstances. Levine's book I mentioned here ("Trauma and Memory") discusses the somatic process of working with implicit memories. My only issue with his writing is that he uses examples that make it sound like people are somehow healed in one session (it's not like that, or at least not in my experience!).

Others: Laurence Heller, in "Healing Developmental Trauma", discusses a somatic, neuro-affective approach (like Somatic Experiencing with also strong emphasis on the relational aspect, as well as cognitive processing...this is probably closest to what I'm doing with my therapist). For the really deep, seemingly intractable patterns created by early trauma Siebern Fisher uses a combination of therapy and neurofeedback. Neurofeedback isn't an option for me, but Somatic Experiencing and tuning into my body is probably as close as I can get...allowing myself to notice those really primitive responses and learning to respond differently, complete thwarted experiences, rewire some patterns, etc. Takes time but it seems to be helpful to me. No more panic attacks and far fewer total meltdowns.