Are We Acting Guilty?

[jeeps for now]

I hope this post will be ok with everyone. It is an issue that has bothered me for a long time, yet one I could only recently describe. Regarding us people with PTSD:

When I am acting anxious in a public setting, or perhaps dissociating due to PTSD triggering, people tend to react as though I am hiding something and not being honest with them. This has troubled me in the past, at the times when I was actually being quite honest. When I feel emotionally stable, this doesn't happen.

I'm wondering what others think about this, and whether you think this to be one of the reasons we isolate ourselves.

 

[redfox]

This seems to happen to me all the time, I get stopped in stores and other places where they think I am shoplifting. I don't know if it has anything to do with the PTSD although I am told I act kind of jumpy all the time. I think I start to feel guilty even when not doing anything wrong because I did shoplift a lot as a kid. I am also 1/2 Mexican and I get mistaken for a middle easterner sometimes so there might be a racial thing going on.

 

[boondockbabe]

This is one of the main reasons I don't like to leave the ranch. I have been treated poorly by people in my saddle club because they don't understand. They treat me like I'm some kind of bad person. They are Aggeressive people and I have serious eye-contact issues. I am just not comfortable looking into someones face.I also talk sporadicly when around people which makes me look like I have somthing to hide.(I do, I have always hidden so much of myself for protective purposes) I always wonder what they must be thinking of me. Obioulsy no good by the look on their face(or is it in my head?) If I take medication before I go they accuse me of being "high". I don't understand it. And it hurts so bad I just avoid it. I don't hardly ever leave the ranch unless someone comes and gets me. I've gotta be crazy to try going to college. It really sucks when normal people are the biggest source of my ptsd. It makes it really hard to be comfortable. I percieve everyone as a potential threat. Mabye somebody should write a paper on how and why having ptsd makes you a B.S. magnet.

 

[shadowchaser]

Well my method for dealing with the accusations (humor as a shield I guess) is to say in a loud voice "Oh thank you for keeping an eye out for me. That is so kind of store security to make sure the person on medication isn't getting themselves hurt in your store. Say would you be willing to push my cart for me. Also some of these things are kinda high up could you get them down for me. Thank you so much for being so kind!" I have a reputation in several stores now. I guess a variation for the saddle club would be "Wow! You are so observant to notice that I took my prescribed medications to try to make things easier so I can communicate with you. Thanks for noticing!"

 

[boondockbabe]

Last time it happened, they accused me of drinking! I don't touch alchol. I got kinda mad and shoved the foam cup in the ladys face and asked her if she could smell anything. I quit going. It's just too unhealthy. I need to learn how to trust people. Being around a bunch of insinsitive A-holes is not gonna make me better. I decided that I am not ready for that kind of interaction so now I go on group trail rides. The people are much nicer.

 

[Reclusive]

I think that the change in your social group is probably the best idea. Your saddle club kinda sounds like a bunch of jerks! I can't tell about the store thing - when I was a teen and in my twenties I was pretty gothy with green hair, so I'm kinda used to people thinking I'm stealing something or weird. But I think it's obvious I'm just having issues as I tend to full out stop in the middle of aisles and stare blankly ahead. But, again, I'm used to people thinking I'm weird, so I'm not too bothered by it.

But yeah - hang out around nice people instead of mean people until you feel comfortable in social situations. Then take a riding crop to your saddle club members!

 

[anni]

If you wish to have people sort of clear a path around you, it's amazing how well it works when one carries a riding crop around in public. I don't do it aggressively or with that intent- it's a security blanket but you do get some funny looks sometimes.

 

[Reclusive]

Anni, I love you and your riding crop! <3

 

[boondockbabe]

I used to say that I would love to be able to "round pen" some people. fifteen min. and they'd come out with a new attitude just like the horses do. Screw that crazy saddle club, I really like the trail riders much more and there is no stress because there's no compitition. Just riding horses and having fun. The awesome views are a bonus.

 

[BrazenBull]

People that try to be close to me (I prefer not to get emotionally attached with anyone, but I allow acquaintances) usually think that I don't seem to trust them. They only think I'm not being honest with them when I say nothing is wrong, but something has triggered me and something is obviously wrong with me.
People that don't really know me sometimes ask if I'm scared of them(?) Weird, I may have a reason to be terrified of the human race but that obviously not the case.

My reaction is like a study I read about dogs. Try this if you have one, drop a crumpled up piece of paper by the dog, and point at it and say "What is this?" in a stern voice, the dog will look guilty, confused or even shocked, but even if it had done nothing bad. Its just a fight or flight response I'm guessing :')
I'm just like a jumpy, hyper, submissive dog, that always has its tail between its legs.

 

[Reclusive]

I thought of this thread yesterday when I was at Walmart. I was feeling paranoid and kept looking over my shoulder and after awhile thought "gee, I'm acting suspicious". LOL Ah, well.

 

[Vee Lagrome]

Yeah, I have been accused of all kinds of things, one of the more popular things being that I'm having an affair or am otherwise being unfaithful to my husband. It's particularly because my alarms go off whenever someone starts asking me questions about particulars (what did you do yesterday, where were you earlier today, why didn't you answer your phone). Whenever someone asks me those kinds of things, I immediately bristle and refuse to answer anything. It never occurred to me what other people might interpret that as until my husband told me that my in-laws were somehow convinced that I was cheating on him and/or hiding something. My husband had bought into this for a while and even started snooping through my emails and stuff like that, which became a huge fight between us.

Granted, he knows now that I generally don't care for men and I've really only made an exception for my husband... :roflmao: I cannot think of anything more revolting than having a boyfriend. I mean, why spend time with some ...guy... when I would SO much rather be by myself and have the complete autonomy to just up and leave and go wherever I want to? My husband gets that now, which is really great. It takes a lot of pressure off of me. I think my in-laws sort of understand, but they think I'm just more of a "free-spirit" type or something. I do get the feeling though that they still think I'm hiding some huge secret from the world. :devilish: