Sexual Assault Brother.

[aj95]

I accept your apology.

I had a very bad day today. I came home from school and cried. I feel like god is punishing me for something.

 

[bluebird]

You deserve no punishment, please, believe me! I guess you began to acknowledge your emotions and feelings, which is really overwhelming. Sometimes it brings a great relief to cry, don't be ashamed about your tears...

How are you doing now? :hug:

 

[aj95]

I've been feeling really bad. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to go through. I don't know if I blocked out what happened to me, or what, I remembered it happening to me but I never recognized it as abuse. It wasn't until this last new years that I realized I was abused.

 

[Lucycat]

I've been feeling really bad.

I am sorry that you are feeling bad

It wasn't until this last new years that I realized I was abused.

Now that you realise that you were abused, you have a reason for why you feel so bad. That is a good thing. Once you know why you can start to make changes.

You can never change what happened in the past, but you can change how it affects you and how you feel about it. You can stop the memories having control over you.

You may have read other threads about CBT or Cognitive Bahavioural Therapy that is all about changing automatic negative thoughts into more positive ones. It is certainly not easy and needs repeated practice but it can make big differences to the way you feel. It is always best to work with a therapist, but as an alternative there are some online CBT sites that could help.

 

[aj95]

This all makes sense now. I've been suicidal before. I've had problems with anorexia. I've been depressed for a long time and it all makes sense now. I wish I could go back to when I didn't know what was wrong with me.

 

[bluebird]

There is no point in thinking about "ifs" and "maybes" - you can start looking at the future...

I am sorry to hear you were struggling and I want to assure you that this is actually quite common among survivors... I always assumed I was losing my mind until last year when I was able to disclose to somebody. T

he moment you understand why do you feel the way you feel - I believe this moment is the moment when you can start recovering. You can go past this. You can live a full and happy life. You can find help... Take care of yourself and always, always remember, it was not your fault :hug: