Call Into Tdoc..need Help Now

[Srain]

I put in a call ASAP...I know when I start looking at myself as "irreparably broken" and there is nothing that can help and maybe I'm too old and not worth the effort, it's "Danger Will Rogers!!", way past "Houston We've Got a Problem".
know
I am feeling really really bad about not having gotten further than I have. My husband needs my strength not my illness getting in his way. I can't lean on him right now.

My heart feels like it's crushing under the weight of all the years I've been looking, begging, pleading with people to PLEASE HELP ME!!

Logically I know I am not old, logically I know hope I'm not a lost case, but logic gets tiresome to one who is overwhelmed with emotional nightmares day and night. That's where I'm at right now, today. :cry:
:(

 

[Tinyflame]

(((((((((((((Rain))))))))))))) :(:cry:

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

((((Rain))))

Glad you know that you can reach out for help with your T. I think you reaching out is a positive thing.

Please take care of yourself.

 

[Tessa]

(((HUGS))) It is always darkest before the dawn. I pray you will find strength to see the light that is ahead and waiting to warm you.

 

[The Albatross]

(((Rain)))

During these times, for myself, I just try to create as little chaos as possible. Sounds like you're trying to do that too... glad you're here and experessing what your feeling and thinking, and that you called your T. Anything you can do for stress reduction?

 

[OKRADLAK]

(((((((((((SRAIN)))))))))))))))

I know how that feels. It feels awful and all for no reason. These things did not have to happen to us. But we CAN take the energy and work it. I know we can. We are in this together and we can really help each other. Feed off our energy if you can. YOU CAN!

Think of the things you are that make you special. You are kind and you care about people. The trauma has done terrible things to us all, but it has also put us in places we would never have been otherwise.

We are now in the thick of meaning, every one of us. Stupid things? Ha....we laugh at them. Meaningless dross? We walk away from it. It may not be "worth it" and I dare say most of us would much rather have had happy lives with two dogs, a spouse, a 401K, and a boat, but there may be some of us who would actually rather have meaning, truth, and importance over happiness.

Maybe eventually we will all have both?!

TIll then, try to lean on us and all the things you have learned. You are a wise soul and you can make it!!

 

[Nighthawk]

Oh (((Rain)))
I forced myself to the Dr this moning had to openthe can of worms and in shame as for help. Even though it is the right thing to do it still feels so bad.

Thinking of you, standing with you.
I am proud of you for taking the step.

NH

 

[Deaf Global Nomad]

Hi Rain,

I am sorry that you are struggling at the moment. Bright and I are thinking of you and are hoping that your T gets back to you soon. I'm glad that you were able to reach out for help when you needed it.

I like the Albatross's suggestion on stress reduction, especially while you are waiting for a return call from your T. Can you take a warm bath. Can you relax with your animals? Can draw or paint a picture in which you can try to express what you are feeling or a place where you feel calm?

If you need to can you contact a local crisis line just to talk to a live person while you wait?

Take care of yourself!!!

 

[Queen Boudica]

I'm so sorry Rain you are feeling so bad at the moment.

You have got very far, I have read the stuff that you have written and you are getting there, one breath at a time. And the stuff you have written on my posts has helped me. Just by being on this forum you have been helping others with your experience and compassion.

I don't know what to write to make you feel better. Feels like I am going through waves and waves of terrible downs and panics, but I know I come out of them and I know there is so much I need to do to get myself in a much better position, a lot of work. But I am determined to take it slow because that is all I can do at the moment, slow. Faster would be far to overwhelming and would just result in me going backwards. So slow is good as long as it is getting there. Slow is what your body needs. Things will speed up when you are in a better place.

Yes, try and do as much as possible that is not stressful and treats you. I find just sitting outside with a tea, staring at the trees and birds and breathing slowly helps me.

I hope it gets better very soon and you are worth the effort. (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Rain))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

 

[AngelaMarie]

I wish I could do more than give you a hug and tell you that I KNOW you are worth it!!!! Sending you positive energy your way!!!

The only other thing I can think of is send you candles burning for you!!

Hang in there, my friend!

 

[kimba]

Hi Rain
Hope by now you may be having an easier time. Please take care of yourself.

 

[intothelight]

(((Rain)))