Cannot Face Quitting My Job

[LikeCharlotte]

This is relatively simple but I often have trouble with conflict. I need to quit my job and I have already accepted another offer. The issue is that I am scared of my boss. I know that much of my fear has little to do with him and is related to my CPTSD but as you all well know rationalizing doesn't help.

He is an alcoholic and suffice to say work is often an awful trigger for me. I need to leave but facing him to give notice is becoming an impossible task. I fall apart every time I try. At this point I will be giving less than 2 weeks notice because I simply cannot face it.

I am not able to simple write a letter of resignation because it is just the two of us there.

Any suggestions on how I can do this without crumbling? Has anyone had to face a huge trigger situation and made it through?

 

[trapped]

Do you have to face him in person when you tell him, or could you perhaps write him an email or leave a note for him instead? Even if there are just the two of you there, you should still be able to write a letter of resignation and perhaps leave it on his desk for him, or someplace where he will get it but where you won't have to hand it to him? You'll have to talk to him after you give it to him, but I think maybe having the letter or email may help relieve a tiny bit of your anxiety, so that he already knows and you don't have to stress about how to bring it up.

 

[BethRSA]

I think the letter is a good idea. Even if you have to read it to him, for me reading the letter to him (no eye contact) would be easier than telling him.

I would make a plan to somehow be able to tell him and then go somewhere private--even if it's just the bathroom.

Or, if you can have someone (a supportive friend) there with you when you tell him, that can be a big help. When I had to tell my parents about the gang rape/pregnancy/miscarriage, I had 2 friends there who I had told. Their "job" was to protect me from any fallout, be able to handle Mom if/when she started freaking out, and to be someone that Dad could talk to about it (as if he ever would). It was one of the toughest things I ever had to do, but I'm still alive...4 years later.

:Hug_emoticon: Beth

 

[BethRSA]

Sorry. The previous message came up twice

 

[Deleted member 541]

I know this sounds awful.....But, I think you just need to face the fact that there is no way around this. Whether you do it face to face, through an email, or read it to him......If he is a jerk, he will respond like a jerk!!!!! You will get triggered either way. IF he responds like a REAL JERK, QUIT right then and there and walk out!!!!!!!! That's my advice!!!!!

 

[LikeCharlotte]

Okay. I did it and it didn't turn out well but I managed. I literally spent the rest of the day sweating and feeling disoriented. Hopefully I can get through the next week or so without conflict. Thanks for the advice!

 

[shiraz]

Well done Charlotte!

You have made steps to de-stress your life. Hang in there it is almost over.

**hugs**

 

[Irton Pike]

Well done! Must have been awful, but you did it. Jobs done! And its a good un!

 

[LikeCharlotte]

I love my new job. I just wanted to say thanks for the encouragement:thumbs-up.

 

[QuietNow]

Hi Charlotte,
What is your new job like? The environment? I'm curious because my work environment is getting more and more difficult, so I'm trying to figure out what things I like and what things are huge trigger areas for me.

The cubicle is a trigger, but I think I can make it work for me if I ever get to see what it really looks like.

And what are you doing? I'm wondering if it isn't time for a career change for me, so I'm looking for what kind of jobs other PTSD people have.

 

[Jinn]

Yay! Pretty soon you will never have to deal with that toxic man! Bravo!