Can't Stop Laughing During Therapy!

[Maxi]

Whenever I start speaking about things which make me uncomfortable, or things which are quite serious in therapy ie trauma, I laugh and if I don't laugh I smile! How do I stop myself from doing this! I used to only do it in therapy, but I've noticed that I've started to do it in other areas of my life as well now. what emotions am I meant to show when talking about things which are painful?

Help :(

 

[jaccat]

I smile too, usually when I'm talking about the most difficult things. My therapist understands it's just a coping mechanism as I can't handle the feelings that go with the memories, and I'm trying to downplay their seriousness. I'm not doing it as much as I did, now I'm beginning to access those feelings. I'm sure that'll happen for you too.

 

[Upside Down Eagle]

I used to do that too. It went away on its own, I think.

Now I am actually serious, distant and suspicious when people ask me about my background :p. So it shifts. But eventually the laughing (which for me was another way of being distant but in a polite way) will fade, and you already discovered it, on your own, so that's good. I had no idea of it until someone told me.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

I laugh at the wrong moments at times.... I think it is a way of coping as we don't necessarily want to feel certain things at certain times.

 

[seedling]

I do this too, especially in therapy. My last therapist said once "I've come to realize that when you laugh it's something serious."

I've noticed that I will try to joke about things to help out awkward situations. I've come to see that it's not always appropriate and I do it out of a certain feeling I get. Not sure what it is yet.

I laugh in therapy now mostly when I know I want to say something and I am actually going to be able to say it - but it always is prefaced with laugh/silence/laugh until it comes out. I try not to worry about it, it seems to me like an expression of emotion that is safe to come out that way so I let it be.

 

[sun seeker]

It depends. Yes, it can be how you distance yourself from what you are talking about, but also laughter is a way of releasing tension so not necessarily a bad thing even if it doesn't fit with the seriousness of the topic. If you feel relief after laughing, it's probably helping you and nothing to worry about.

 

[J_trustno1]

I laugh when I am nervous. I don't know, it's a coping mechanism. Maybe you are nervous or not very comfortable talking about your trauma.

 

[ghotiff]

I think it's emotional distancing as a coping mechanism. If doing it outside of therapy is a new think for you it indicates to me that you are going too fast in therapy and you should stabilize more. I would definitely discuss the newness of it happening outside therapy with your T as any additional coping mechanism being "needed" is a flag for me.

 

[Kas_Can_Fly]

It's actually quite a normal physical response, crying and laughing are both on the same spectrum of emotions and are linked. You might appreciate the following information about it:

Laughing and crying are similar psychological reactions. "Both occur during states of high emotional arousal, involve lingering effects, and don't cleanly turn on and off," says Robert R. Provine, PhD, a psychologistat the University of Maryland, Baltimore County, and author of Laughter: A Scientific Investigation.

We associate crying with sadness, but tearing up is an even more complex human response. Tears are triggered by a variety of emotions—"by pain, sadness, and in some cases even extreme mirth. It's just the way we've evolved," says Lee Duffner, MD, a professor of ophthalmology at the University of Miami's Bascom Palmer Eye Institute.

As it turns out, that's good, because both laughter and crying can ease a stressful experience, probably by counteracting the effects of cortisol and adrenaline.

(ref: http://www.prevention.com/health/healthy-living/causes-behind-13-odd-physical-body-quirks)

 

[Ronin]

Don't focus on that response, just acknowledge it, focus on what's behind it. You laugh somewhere where others cry, but it's understanding of those reactions as proper or improper that's an issue here, not those reactions themselves. That you laugh isn't an issue here. It doesn't make you a bad person in any way, it doesn't make you incapable of healing, etc. It's just a reaction. You don't need to get rid of it. You need to understand how it works in your life, what's it defense against, how *that* makes you feel & react.

You're not odd, either.
(On a personal note, I've got a scale of laughter in response to traumatic events. They're all different, the feeling under is different, that there's pain involved is a common theme. It has made therapy a bit awkward, yah. But figuring the differences in each was a starting point. So was shifting attention from the laughter itself. It's emoting. Emoting is good. It's better than nothing. Imo at least.)

 

[Maxi]

Thanks everyone! You've all been reassuringly lovely and I'm so glad to learn that I'm not as alone in this as I thought I was. I do hope that it just fades away slowly the more comfortable I become about talking about my feelings. My therapist has spoken about the laughing and is pretty able to read when I find something serious, or not, so there's not a lot of pressure from her to change this habit of mine. I am however, like suggested, going to try and explore why certain situations make me feel uncomfortable and feel the need to smile. Once again thank you everyone!

 

[shell]

When I first started talking I was so avoidant of my emotions that laughing and smiling while talking about the worst of my trauma was the only way I could talk about it, after a while I could feel myself doing it. My T would have me stop talking and just allow myself to feel what it was I was afraid of. I no longer rely on it, but it took a long time before I became more comfortable to stop being afraid of my emotions and expressing them.